What is your arguing style?

Are you the type to state your feelings to dh/fh about a topic leave it at that and keep it movin ?

or


Do you repeat your point ad nauseam over and over again until YOU get closure or until you feel he totally understands you?

I will admit that I can be a bit repetitive, but I am working on it.

I totally am :
Do you repeat your point ad nauseam over and over again until YOU get closure or until you feel he totally understands you?


It stinks, but i dont think i will ever be able to change.

Unfortunatlly i tend to beat the dead horse
I wish i could change this & i have tried but like Suzanne said i dont think i really will.
This only happens with certain things not everything

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Posted by nrvbrd

Do you repeat your point ad nauseam over and over again until YOU get closure or until you feel he totally understands you?

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Yep, that's me. Then I feel bad about bugging him so much and apologize.

Alot of repetitive women out there- we gotta stop driving our men crazy ladies

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Posted by nrvbrd

Are you the type to state your feelings to dh/fh about a topic leave it at that and keep it movin ?

or


Do you repeat your point ad nauseam over and over again until YOU get closure or until you feel he totally understands you?

I will admit that I can be a bit repetitive, but I am working on it.

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Ugh .. I HATE to admit this (hope FH is not reading!) but I am definitely:

Do you repeat your point ad nauseam over and over again until YOU get closure or until
you feel he totally understands you?

This is mostly b/c he is the complete opposite and this usually starts to irk me...

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Posted by nrvbrd

Alot of repetitive women out there- we gotta stop driving our men crazy ladies

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Mine drives me crazy - he does this chronically, arguing or not. And even worse then that - the bringing up past arguments. I get so frustrated being forced to re-argue everything all the time.

Ugh .. I HATE to admit this (hope FH is not reading!) but I am definitely:

Do you repeat your point ad nauseam over and over again until YOU get closure or until
you feel he totally understands you?

This is mostly b/c he is the complete opposite and this usually starts to irk me...

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my hubby is like this too, so passe, nothing bothers him- drives me crazy.

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Posted by nrvbrd

Do you repeat your point ad nauseam over and over again until YOU get closure or until you feel he totally understands you?

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that's me, in a nutshell. FH tends to tune me out when I get started which only makes me repeat myself more and more and eventually I forget my point. Its not fun.

I can admit I fall into number 2, but I only repeat myself over and over because he is too dopey to get it the first time

I am trying SO hard to revise my communication style...DH is a retreater, he does not like to argue so he just shuts down and sits there saying nothing. Often, that leads me to ramble on, trying to help him 'get my point'. After 8 years w. the man, I am finally learning to give him space to let him figure out what I mean, instead of beating him over the head with it. Sometimes he needs time to realize how right I am

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Posted by hmichick

I can admit I fall into number 2, but I only repeat myself over and over because he is too dopey to get it the first time

I am trying SO hard to revise my communication style...DH is a retreater, he does not like to argue so he just shuts down and sits there saying nothing. Often, that leads me to ramble on, trying to help him 'get my point'. After 8 years w. the man, I am finally learning to give him space to let him figure out what I mean, instead of beating him over the head with it. Sometimes he needs time to realize how right I am

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You hit it right on the nail. We need to give them space and let them figure it out on their own instead of trying to beat them in the head with it.

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Posted by hmichick

I can admit I fall into number 2, but I only repeat myself over and over because he is too dopey to get it the first time

I am trying SO hard to revise my communication style...DH is a retreater, he does not like to argue so he just shuts down and sits there saying nothing. Often, that leads me to ramble on, trying to help him 'get my point'. After 8 years w. the man, I am finally learning to give him space to let him figure out what I mean, instead of beating him over the head with it. Sometimes he needs time to realize how right I am

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My thoughts exactly. FH is incredibly smart, but for some reason he can never understand why certain OBVIOUS things upset me. Then I'll turn around and tell my best friend my story and she knows EXACTLY what I mean.
So I repeat and repeat until he finally gets it! I hate that but without closure I feel like crap.

I was the type to say it over and over again.
But now I just Ask DH to repeat EXACTLY what I said in my words, you'be be suprised how many times what he says has no resemblence what so ever to what I said.
Once we clear that up I ask him give me an example of what I mean, so he has a visual, and the prob seems to go away, and no more repeating myself over and over!!
Of course It helps that I have learned to pick my battles!!

ETA: After we go through all the above I ask DH to explain it in his own words, that way I know we both understand eachother.

Do you repeat your point ad nauseam over and over again until YOU get closure or until you feel he totally understands you?


This would be more to a point, however in my case it is because DH listens only to the first two words of whatever I say, the first 2 times I say it. He could be looking directly at me when we are talking and have no idea what I said to him. This wonderful habit of his is driving me to insanity.

I used to be able to just tell him stuff and leave it, but now that he has joined the selective hearing club I can't do that anymore.

Do you repeat your point ad nauseam over and over again until YOU get closure or until you feel he totally understands you?


I am this way also and FI is the exact opposite. He will just ignore me til I stop taking about it. Oh well, at least I try to get my point across.