What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

I always called them Mr. and Mrs. so and so and now that we're married i have no idea what to call them! I feel funny calling them by their first names and I REFUSE to call someone Mom and Dad that arent my real parents! Since the wedding, I havent called them anything. I addressed their TY's as Mom and Dad D! Help!!!!

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

i've always called them by their 1st names and that's what i call them now.

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

I call FH parents by their first name and I am not sure if I will call them mom and dad after the wedding. My FH calls my mom by her first name and my dad by his last name.

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

i call fh's mom by her first name, and i know she will want me to call her mom afterward but it will be weird, i guess i will just do it to not cause drama and because i don't see her that often but it will take some getting used to

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

I did the mr and mrs thing for a while, but then they both got remarried so for about 4 years I have not called his mom anything
I told dh I will start calling her something once the kiddies come and i can say nanny or something. Until then - I just wait for her to look at me before i say something! (I know this may sound horrible)
On another note my parents are OBSESSED with the idea of dh calling them mom and dad and he is SOOO not into that

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

I always called them Mr. & Mrs. M (for short) & lately DH is asking me why I'm still calling them Mr. & Mrs. (in front of them!!!!!!!!!)--I said I'm just in the habit....personally I don't feel right calling them mom & dad.....its tough...

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

Mom...sis and bro...not married yet and been calling them that for a yr!!!

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

Nothing. I wait til they look at me!

His mom tried to get me to call her by her first name for years, but I always go by Mr. and Mrs., but his parents are divorced and her new husband is just known by his first name. I get so confused that I just say nothing.

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

ive alwasys calle dby 1st name, but in cards i write mom and dad

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

i try HEY YOU!
or clear my throat until they look up



i will eventually call them mom and dad but when i try to get it out it gets stuck in my throat

i call his grandparents Nan and Pop though and all of his aunts and uncles I call Aunt XXXX or whatever. . . .

FH calls my parents: Mr. I....uuhh i mean Tony...uuhh heyyy over here! lol he gets so confused

ETA: when i write MOM and DAD in cards his mom always loves it so i think thats a hint that i should start calling them that!!

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

Ron and Liz dont let us post those words.

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

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Posted by debsey75

Ron and Liz dont let us post those words.

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OMG, that cracked me up!!

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

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Posted by kittythestray

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Posted by debsey75

Ron and Liz dont let us post those words.

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OMG, that cracked me up!!

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me, too.



It's a touchy subject....years ago, she would send me little gifts and send some for my little girl and I would promptly send her a thank you with her first name. Every mother of the guy I'd dated up to this point would say when I met them, 'Call me FIRSTNAME.' My mother did this to DH...he's never called her anything different. When I met her, there was no such conversation...thus I assumed first names were fine. Apparently she took great offense to this because I was her son's girlfriend [I was 22 at the time, he was 23...not high school!!] and thought that was inappropriate, well she didn't tell me this, she had DH tell me...it broke my heart because A-I'm sensitive and thought I was being nice all this time and B-why didn't she just tell me? So began an awkward battle of Mrs. M, HERFIRSTNAME, Mrs. Wholelastname, etc... on cards and emails she would send me. It frustrated me to no end. [side note, I felt that Mrs. LASTNAME was too formal and stuffy...like we weren't 'close']

[meanwhile there's a girl who is 20 (NOW making her 17 when I met her)...my SIL's best frieind...who calls her by her first name!!!!! so a 20 year old can, but a 22 year old [I'm 25 now] mother cannot??? made my complex over this worse]

So when we got engaged, they looked at me and said, 'Now you can just call us mom and dad.'

So I tell DH this, he tells me not to, he's not comfortable with that!

So still I avoid situations where I need to 'call them.' On the phone I use the 'mom and dad' bit....but it feels so wrong...all because of some comment DH made really.

They also had issues over what my daughter would call them so his mother decided that she would be 'nana' and collectively that his dad would be 'grandpa.' One day someone asked her something about being a grandmother and she had the nerve to say she can never be grandma b/c she's 'nana.' Some people don't realize how hurtful and dumb these comments are! SHE chose 'nana.'

disclaimer: I do think this is all comical NOW, but at the time it all happened, it all hurt my feelings. It's fun to look back and laugh at this stuff.

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

I'm horrible with this and we LIVE with them! They are really nice about it but I just feel like anything I choose sounds weird or wrong to me (mom/dad, first names, etc.)

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????

I forget to mention that my one SIL calls them 'mom and dad' and she will say this to me like 'mom and dad said__' It always confuses the heck out of me b/c I'm an only child and not used to hearing someone else refer to our 'mom and dad'

Re: What the heck do you guys call your new IL's????