Please help me with this difficult situation. Do I invite these people to my wedding or not? In our circle of friends I have a problem with two people.
#1. A male friend who has become close friends with my fiance but does not like me very much and makes that blatantly clear. He is rude to me when we are in our group, does not talk to me, and is hesitate to say hello. Just last night I tapped him on the back, said hello and he just ignored me, didn't even look at me. My fiancé and I fight about it all the time, I just don't get how FH doesn't say anything to him. Do I invite him to my wedding? He is such a miserable person always complaining about everyone, and I am one of them.
#2. My old roommate that I no longer talk to. She had a mouth full to say about me behind my back to everyone when we were roommates. We are now cordial with each other, but everyone is telling me that if I don't invite her, there will be drama. She doesn't like me as much as I don't like her. Since we have the same group of friends we just put up with it when we are together. Things have gotten better, but honestly I feel uncomfortable around her and I really would not want her there. But everyone is insisting I invite her.
Do I suck it up and invite these two? Or not invite them and deal with the consequences of the drama aftermath?
Thank you!
cavvento
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
Well, I guess it depends on what that 'drama' would entail. If your old roommate is not invited and throws a hissy fit with your group of friends, will they all just roll their eyes and move on, or could she cause serious damage with your group of friends? If it's a matter of her mouthing off about you and your friends letting it go in one ear and out the other, then I say don't have her there if you don't want her there. Your friendship is already over and so if it's just bad words coming from her, it should really have no impact on you. If you think that she'd actually jeopardize your current friendships somehow, then I'd invite her.
WinterBride10
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
Thanks...no I don't think she would jeopardize my other friendships...everyone kind of stays out of each other's problems (I'm not the only one she had a problem with) it will probably just make things that more uncomfortable when we are around each other. Everyone knows our relationship and that we really are no longer friends.
People tell me to invite her anyway and she probably won't come. Leave it up to her to decide.
Soon_to_be_Stanek
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
absolutely not, to both. This is YOUR special day...a day when you dont need to be P.C. or worry about feelings...
ttdiff11
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
Posted by Soon_to_be_Stanek
absolutely not, to both. This is YOUR special day...a day when you dont need to be P.C. or worry about feelings...
i agree
AdriandSteve
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
Posted by WinterBride10
Hi All- Sorry..this is a bit long.
Please help me with this difficult situation. Do I invite these people to my wedding or not? In our circle of friends I have a problem with two people.
#1. A male friend who has become close friends with my fiance but does not like me very much and makes that blatantly clear. He is rude to me when we are in our group, does not talk to me, and is hesitate to say hello. Just last night I tapped him on the back, said hello and he just ignored me, didn't even look at me. My fiancé and I fight about it all the time, I just don't get how FH doesn't say anything to him. Do I invite him to my wedding? He is such a miserable person always complaining about everyone, and I am one of them.
#2. My old roommate that I no longer talk to. She had a mouth full to say about me behind my back to everyone when we were roommates. We are now cordial with each other, but everyone is telling me that if I don't invite her, there will be drama. She doesn't like me as much as I don't like her. Since we have the same group of friends we just put up with it when we are together. Things have gotten better, but honestly I feel uncomfortable around her and I really would not want her there. But everyone is insisting I invite her.
Do I suck it up and invite these two? Or not invite them and deal with the consequences of the drama aftermath?
Thank you!
FH must must talk to his friend he he wants him to be invited to your wedding.
I wouldn't bother with your former roommate.
MarjorieFrank
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
I would invite the second person and cut ties with her after the wedding. I feel not inviting her is exactly what she wants. If she and you have a bunch of mutual friends, hopefully you won't even see her at the wedding because she'll be too busy with her friends. HOWEVER If it is a small wedding and her presence will be felt/known, then I wouldn't invite her.
The first person sounds like a total d0uchebag. I wouldn't invite him, but I think you may need to check with your FH. If your FH really wants him there I think you will have to make that sacrifice for FH.
If any of these two people will cause a scene at your wedding, then definitely don't invite them. But, I think that you won't even realize that they are there when the day is blurring by.
bklynbride09
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
honestly, i would say absolutely not for both of them. it is not worth it to have people that make you uncomfortable at your wedding. you should be happy and celebrating with the people you love and not worrying about these two.
if anyone has a problem with the guest list or has the audacity to comment on why you chose not to invite them, you can just say that when they are planning their own wedding they are more than welcome to invite those two, but you do not feel comfortable doing so, end of story.
good luck with whatever you choose!
jcreilly
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
If there will be drama if you dont invite then just have them there ( maybe they will not come) I would not invite ur old roomate-jmo, now the other person if is friends with ur Fh then maybe does fh want him there? then just invite him1
WinterBride10
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
Posted by MarjorieFrank
I would invite the second person and cut ties with her after the wedding. I feel not inviting her is exactly what she wants. If she and you have a bunch of mutual friends, hopefully you won't even see her at the wedding because she'll be too busy with her friends. HOWEVER If it is a small wedding and her presence will be felt/known, then I wouldn't invite her.
The first person sounds like a total d0uchebag. I wouldn't invite him, but I think you may need to check with your FH. If your FH really wants him there I think you will have to make that sacrifice for FH.
If any of these two people will cause a scene at your wedding, then definitely don't invite them. But, I think that you won't even realize that they are there when the day is blurring by.
My room only holds 180 and I had actually had a fight with my mother about inviting family I don't know because the room is so small.
The male is also a miserable drunk and I'm afraid he might say some words about me or others at the wedding. He has embarrassed himself before at other weddings.
The only scene my ex-roommate might make is with my other friend who she doesn't like. My ex-roommate's fiance cheated on her with this girl who will be at my wedding. I wish her wedidng was first so I wouldn't have to make this decision!
FutureLW
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
#1 - absolutely not! From what you are saying there is no reason he should be invited
#2 - no. It doesn't matter what other people think; it's your day.
allsmiles830
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
I say No. It's your wedding! You are NOT obligated to invite anyone that you don't want....If there's drama surrounding it, it isn't meant to be!
mokie74m
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
I don't think you should invite either of them. From what you have said, they already don't like you and cause you drama so what's the difference if you don't invite them. You don't need negative people in your life and you especially don't need them at your wedding. It's your day and you want to be surrounded by people who love and care about you.
Just the fact that you have to ask if you should invite them and that you feel all this confusion and aggrevation then that should be a sign that you shouldn't invite them. JMO
WinterBride10
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
Thank you all so much! I greatly appreciate your responses. This keeps me up at night. I have so many other things to worry about, I hate worrying about this.
I think you are all right that I shouldn't invite them, I don't want them there, but my FH is always trying to avoid the drama and thinks we should be the 'bigger people' and just invite them.
Sarahgetsmarried
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
Honestly, dont invite either one.
Drama with roomate? WhatEVER. She talks about you behind your back? She is the drama queen. Dont get involved, dont invite her, dont feed the drams *IF* she causes any.
The FH friend? NO friggin way. Eith FH talks to him and find out *** or you dont invite him....tell FH he treats you like garbage and you dont want someone at the wedding who treats you liek garbage.
BriansWifey
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
i personally wouldnt invite either one of them. just because u know them doesnt mean they have to be invited, especially since they sound like miserable people. it's your day, enjoy it!! (w/o them, hahah)
Its2Snappy
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
I have to be honest and say that I would NOT invite either of them. Weddings can be dramatic enough without adding other people's drama. LOL. I just wouldn't want to deal with the headache.
soontobecruz
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
NO WAY IN HELL WOULD I INVITE EITHER!!! I can't believe it is even a question they both seem toxic and I would not have them at my wedding.
MrsGRod09
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
I wouldn't invite any of these people.
futuremrsjc2010
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Re: What would you do? Guest List Drama!
Im sorry but i wouldnt invite neither, you dont want those kind of ppl around you on your wedding day, especially since they dont like you and they are clearly not supportive. Its your day so dont let everyone else make your decision for you, go with your gut.
