We got engaged almost a month ago. His family knows we are looking for places and they readily offer their opinion. When would they maybe offer some help?? (Even just like paying for band or something)... When did it happen for you? Did any of you not get any money from FH's fam?
coxmandi
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
Consider yourself lucky if they do....
FH's parents are doing the rehersal dinner, and his mom has mentioned a shower, but beyond that it was up to my parents and FH and I to pay for everything.
finallygotthering
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
I almost have everything booked and they still have not said a word
LisaJill
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
He is a Westie named Shane. Little fluff ball! You guys are making me v. depressed about in-laws. I mean, my parents are paying for it, and i think it would be nice if she just offered like even a token amount. I am sure she can scrap up like 3k!!! We are having a v. small wedding!
Beth1210
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
Posted by jilmadison
They didnt. My FI asked them if they could pay for the RD. Which they said they could
that's all my FIL are paying for
LisaJill
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
Also... if my FMIL pays for our RD, then how am I assured that it is not going to be a total yicky affair. Like some big RD at a pizza place or something.
halfpintny
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
DH's parents never offered a dime and refused to help when we asked if they would cover the DJ and the Photographer...in the end they paid for the RD but that was only after it was made clear that they HAD to. My parents paid for the majority of our wedding.
july06bride
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
it happened right away for us... they told us before we were engaged they would help out, i didnt know what they meant till they spoke to FH and told him exactly what helping would be and it is VERY generous!
mka06
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
FH asked if they were planning to contribute a few months after we got engaged. Tried to do it in a way that was not pressuring ... just we are trying to set our budget and are trying to factor everything in. Then he told them to take time to think/talk about it. His conversation went well, and though obviously it depends on the personalities of the people, you or FH could consider this. You would know rather than wondering and while you might not be planning to spend what you won't be able to afford if they don't help -- you might be able to afford more and be bummed if you lock into contracts and then find you could have done something differently.
In the end FMIL and her husband are giving us 1K and FFIL said he has to get back to us bc he's going through a divorce and needs to see how things shake out financially. While I will be disappointed if he doesn't, I will certainly understand. I found for us that it was better to get it out there and ask instead of wonder!
nylisa
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
In our case, never. Actually, they only gave us a gift but did not help us with the wedding in anyway.
Aga
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
they gave us some money about 3 months before the wedding, when we had to make another payment to the hall....
prncssrachel
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
I'm STILL waiting and the wedding was TWO MONTHS AGO!
Seriously, do not assume they will offer, or even help out. I would have FH discuss this with them.
Marcie
Posted:
Member since
Re: When does the groom's family offer to help out???
My parents paid for our reception, DH's parents paid for the rehearsal dinner. We paid for the rest.
We would never assumed DH's parents would pay for anything. It was our our decision to get married, we never would have thought about asking his parents to contribute to the wedding and were very happy that my parents could contribute to the wedding (it was something that my parents had planned on for a very long time).
I am sure if we wanted to ask his parents for a loan, they would have given us a loan in a heartbeat, but like I said it was our decision to get married and didn't see why anyone should help us pay for it.
