Who ever knew that the question 'Are you taking his last name?' would make your stomach drop and tears form. Well FH and I went and got our Marriage liscense today. Very easy and quickly done. Almost to easy...lol nothing in the wedding process has been this easy. So yes when this question was asked i got very quiet..( i never doubted not taking his name just to hear it asked officially though). I truly do feel like i lost a largeof me. Im sure this is normal. What does the groom have to give up? lol. I was in desperate need of that paper bag. I better start carrying one around to all these wedding errands. LOL BUt yes another thing accomplished.
afrodyt2000
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Re: Who ever knew?
LOL wait till you start filling out the name change paperwork. I started doing some of it now and geez it's a lot of paperwork!
sugar4spc
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I thought we couldnt do change paperwork untill we recieve the actual certificate in the mail
Jennifer907
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OMG I know how you feel. I am actually really distraught over the whole name change thing. FH is adamant I take his name. His parents are, as well as my own father. My BMs are the only ones who think I should keep my last name. But FH and I made a deal that I would take his last name if he stops bugging me to name our first son after him (I hate the whole Junior thing). Sooo, it looks like I'll be changing my name to his but I really feel like I'm losing a part of me.
ruzi777
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This is a Battle for me also. I feel like my last name is Who I am
KRISTYRUSSELL
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How long before the wedding do you get your marriage license?? 60 or 30 days???help
ruzi777
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I never thought I would react like this. I really Do not want to give up my name. FH gets upset when I talk about keeping my name. I told him I would hyphenate it. But he is not so Thrilled!! I haven't gone yet for the license we have to do that soon!!! I have to figure out what I am doing by then.
KRISTYRUSSELL
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I feel the same way, and I always wanted to keep my last name, but now, its not even an issue, I will accept his last name as a gift and as a new life with the love of my life...But it will take lots of getting used too Im sure.
ruzi777
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Posted by KRISTYRUSSELL
How long before the wedding do you get your marriage license?? 60 or 30 days???help
the license expires after 60 days. So you have that time frame
afrodyt2000
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Posted by sugar4spc
I thought we couldnt do change paperwork untill we recieve the actual certificate in the mail
You can fill it out but can't send it in or go to like DMV or Social Security. I'm filling them out now because I need to have everything changed ASAP.
HamptonsBride
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awwww...i can understand feeling like that...i am keeping my name, but if i was changing it i'd be upset, especially since many of my guy friends refer to me by my last name.. people always look at me like i am evil when they ask & i say i am keeping it...
KRISTYRUSSELL
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Your not evil, you are you and thats what makes you happy, is your FH ok with it?
I don't want his name. Never did. I'm nothing like him or his family. I'm me and i'm like me and my family. I hate his last name and want to keep mine. He has a hissy everytime we talk about it. I'm 38 and for 38 years I have been who I am. Is it not enough that i'm spending the rest of my life with him? I'm tired and cranky and getting married in 2 weeks. I'm going to bed!
portjeffbride
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Posted by HamptonsBride
awwww...i can understand feeling like that...i am keeping my name, but if i was changing it i'd be upset, especially since many of my guy friends refer to me by my last name.. people always look at me like i am evil when they ask & i say i am keeping it...
yeah, my aunt was acting as if keeping my name is an act of defiance.... she was stunned that FH doesn't mind.
FMIL also doesn't mind, but FBIL (a total a-hole) is treating it like it's a scandal
GwynethBride
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Posted by HamptonsBride
awwww...i can understand feeling like that...i am keeping my name, but if i was changing it i'd be upset, especially since many of my guy friends refer to me by my last name.. people always look at me like i am evil when they ask & i say i am keeping it...
I'm keeping my name and I have felt this way at times too - but some of the times, I think, it is more the result of guilty paranoia on my part. I do feel a little bad...but so much else in my life is changing, it is something I need to hold on to
milana
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i am not keeping my name but i think its awesome that girls keep their own last names. Its a free country we can do what we want
PegaLega
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At least you got it done. I am actually VERY excited to change my name
ostrichhh
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i am a bit freaked out by the whole thing too. for awhile i thought i was cool with it but the other day i had this thought: im going to be a 'HIS LAST NAME' and not a 'MY LAST NAME' anymore. it is SCARY because it feels like so much of your identity is wrapped up in your last name. (esp when youre a teacher) but then i have days when im excited to do it. i guess what i have to remember is that you dont change when your last name does. still the same old me.
BunnyBride
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Posted by portjeffbride
Posted by HamptonsBride
awwww...i can understand feeling like that...i am keeping my name, but if i was changing it i'd be upset, especially since many of my guy friends refer to me by my last name.. people always look at me like i am evil when they ask & i say i am keeping it...
yeah, my aunt was acting as if keeping my name is an act of defiance.... she was stunned that FH doesn't mind.
FMIL also doesn't mind, but FBIL (a total a-hole) is treating it like it's a scandal
MY FH doesn't care that I'm not taking his name either. What ever makes me happy is fine with him. I feel bad for you ladies who feel like you have to even though it's not your first choice
Bride4Mike07
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I know what you mean. I have this question all the time. I feel like I'm giving up my identity to take on a new one....and although that is what marriage is, what does that say for me? I come from a culture where we honor both parent's names....I have both my parent's last names....now I have to give up both! I love FH dearly, and this is something he and I agreed to before we got married, but it bothers me.
