Re: why are people so cheap???
One of my best friends, and a member of the bridal party I'm no longer having, asked me when we were talking about the wedding and other things, including my current financial situation, asked if it would be helpful if she sent us our gift before the wedding or if we wanted it at the wedding. This friend is in grad school getting her doctorate and has loans up the wazoo, similar to my own. I told her that I did not want her giving us money for our wedding and that I would feel incredibly guilty if she gave us money, because I know her financial situation all too well. I proceeded to tell her that we're registered at Macy's and BB&B if that helped her out any. She seemed somewhat relieved, although not overtly because she has enough class not to make *me* feel bad, but I don't know if she's still going to give us a monetary gift and I worry that she will.
My point is that it is more important for us to have her there than to have her gift. I happen to know her financial situation. I don't know the finances of every other person coming to my wedding. If, for one second, I thought they felt they had to give us an expected amount or more for our gift, I would crawl into a hole and die. Does the cash in your bank account make things a little easier? Of course it does. Would I rather someone else shell out the cash to purchase something off my registry that I wouldn't buy myself, even if it's less than the cost of their meal? Actually, yeah. I would prefer that. It also means that they took the time to pick something for us that they thought we could use and put some thought into it. Somehow, that means more to me than someone writing a check in the car on the way to our wedding and sticking it in a card. If they gave us nothing but a card, I'd be equally OK with it.
Bleh. This whole topic always gets me upset. I don't know why I read these threads, but dm24angel, I am so with you on this!
My point is that it is more important for us to have her there than to have her gift. I happen to know her financial situation. I don't know the finances of every other person coming to my wedding. If, for one second, I thought they felt they had to give us an expected amount or more for our gift, I would crawl into a hole and die. Does the cash in your bank account make things a little easier? Of course it does. Would I rather someone else shell out the cash to purchase something off my registry that I wouldn't buy myself, even if it's less than the cost of their meal? Actually, yeah. I would prefer that. It also means that they took the time to pick something for us that they thought we could use and put some thought into it. Somehow, that means more to me than someone writing a check in the car on the way to our wedding and sticking it in a card. If they gave us nothing but a card, I'd be equally OK with it.
Bleh. This whole topic always gets me upset. I don't know why I read these threads, but dm24angel, I am so with you on this!
