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Will you be changing your name?

Danielle41209 Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?

I'll be changing my name, but there goes my rhyming name...

However, if I ever decided to get my doctorate, my FH said he wouldn't mind if I kept it as Dr. [maiden name]. But that's in the future....
Danielle41209 Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?


Posted by haitianbeautie

I particular want to hyphen my name....i like th sound of Dr. Raoul opposed to Dr. Louis>>>it sounds fake becuase i worked hard to be a Dr. as a Raoul not a Louis...Im weird.. I know....





So weird but my father's name is Raoul....spelled the same way.
haitianbeautie Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?


Posted by Danielle41209


Posted by haitianbeautie

I particular want to hyphen my name....i like th sound of Dr. Raoul opposed to Dr. Louis>>>it sounds fake becuase i worked hard to be a Dr. as a Raoul not a Louis...Im weird.. I know....





So weird but my father's name is Raoul....spelled the same way.



HMMMMM. interesting....are you haitian...what is 'your father's first name?????
AugustBridein09 Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?

I hyphenated.
belvedere Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?

My FH would be 'insulted' if I didn't take his last name. I'm not a fan of my middle name, so I am going to make my maiden name -> my middle name.
jenn_eric Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?

I think I'll change it. When I was little I said I would change it (since that's what my mom did), then as I got older I started to think about keeping my name. I still don't know what I want (or prefer) but FH REALLY wants me to change my name, and since I have no real preference either way I figure I'll change it.

So now the laughing part...going from a trunkated word for a last name to a full blown sentence

Edit: for some strange reason he didn't want to take my name
chreesta Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?

I'm taking his.

july2011bride Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?

I will not be changing my name. My name is who I am. I love my name. Everything I have accomplished in my life I have done so as myself and with the last name I was born with. I cannot imagine myself with any other last name. As much as I love FH I am not doing it. Why do women have to change their last names? The only way any names will be changing is if we are both hypenating our last names. He takes mine and I take his and we will Mr. and Mrs. Brown-Turner. I imagine if women suggested that to FH many men would be a lot less open to it. I know it might sound crazy to some people but in my opinion that is the only way it signifies a union. Two equals becoming one name. As opposed to going from my father's daughter to my husband's wife.

AngnShaun Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?


Posted by FutureReinhart

I have to admit the feminist in me is screaming right now. Why should women have to give up their identity when entering into marriage and men don't.

Legally it will only be an issue when, if you have children, you try and take them out of the country. You will have to have their birth certificate with you. Other than that I don't really see any legal issues in keeping your maiden name.

Although I have heard that you can contact your old schools and have them reissue diplomas in your married name. Does anyone know if that is true?



I am curious how your identity is lost by changing your name... other than the name nothing about you is really changing... JMO

ETA: i mean its one thing to make the argument that its sexist... and why its women that have to give up their last name... but i just dont get how a name change means you lost your identity
july2011bride Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?


Posted by AngnShaun


Posted by FutureReinhart

I have to admit the feminist in me is screaming right now. Why should women have to give up their identity when entering into marriage and men don't.

Legally it will only be an issue when, if you have children, you try and take them out of the country. You will have to have their birth certificate with you. Other than that I don't really see any legal issues in keeping your maiden name.

Although I have heard that you can contact your old schools and have them reissue diplomas in your married name. Does anyone know if that is true?



I am curious how your identity is lost by changing your name... other than the name nothing about you is really changing... JMO

ETA: i mean its one thing to make the argument that its sexist... and why its women that have to give up their last name... but i just dont get how a name change means you lost your identity




I would say you dont lose your identity in the sense that your personality or the person that you are changes. But your name is a big part of how you identify yourself. Up until you get married all of the things that shaped who you have become are accomplished as your maiden name. For me there is a deep down attachment to my name, and a connection I have to my own name that is really hard for me to let go of. I hope I am explaining this well. Its not just a name it is who I am. It is a reflection of me, my family, where I come from, my culture, all of these things are important to me. And unless it can be a true blending of the two of us. I will not be changing my name. In a sense I am replacing a part of me with him and he is not doing the same.
AngnShaun Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?


Posted by july2011bride


Posted by AngnShaun


Posted by FutureReinhart

I have to admit the feminist in me is screaming right now. Why should women have to give up their identity when entering into marriage and men don't.

Legally it will only be an issue when, if you have children, you try and take them out of the country. You will have to have their birth certificate with you. Other than that I don't really see any legal issues in keeping your maiden name.

Although I have heard that you can contact your old schools and have them reissue diplomas in your married name. Does anyone know if that is true?



I am curious how your identity is lost by changing your name... other than the name nothing about you is really changing... JMO

ETA: i mean its one thing to make the argument that its sexist... and why its women that have to give up their last name... but i just dont get how a name change means you lost your identity




I would say you dont lose your identity in the sense that your personality or the person that you are changes. But your name is a big part of how you identify yourself. Up until you get married all of the things that shaped who you have become are accomplished as your maiden name. For me there is a deep down attachment to my name, and a connection I have to my own name that is really hard for me to let go of. I hope I am explaining this well. Its not just a name it is who I am. It is a reflection of me, my family, where I come from, my culture, all of these things are important to me. And unless it can be a true blending of the two of us. I will not be changing my name. In a sense I am replacing a part of me with him and he is not doing the same.



having an attachment to your name is a perfectly acceptable reason... im not arguing for or against the keeping or not keeping of a name... i just truly done understand how that name changing is loss of identity... maybe its different because i have no attachment to my last name whatsoever... i would never associate my identity as a person having anything to do with my name... regardless of what my name is im still the same person
harts2976 Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?

Not in a mean way but I like my irish name. His is Jewish and it sounds funny. Buttt i am taking his, I want my whole family like when we have kids to have the same name

JuneBride14 Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?


Posted by haitianbeautie

I particular want to hyphen my name....i like th sound of Dr. Raoul opposed to Dr. Louis>>>it sounds fake becuase i worked hard to be a Dr. as a Raoul not a Louis...Im weird.. I know....



ITA .. that is part of the reason my parents don't want me to change my name- they said I worked too hard for my doctorate with my current last name and will get my degree a month and a half before the wedding
SimHawk8 Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?


Posted by FutureReinhart

I have to admit the feminist in me is screaming right now. Why should women have to give up their identity when entering into marriage and men don't.

Legally it will only be an issue when, if you have children, you try and take them out of the country. You will have to have their birth certificate with you. Other than that I don't really see any legal issues in keeping your maiden name.

Although I have heard that you can contact your old schools and have them reissue diplomas in your married name. Does anyone know if that is true?



That is true, I just already am 10 years into my career and I am known in my field by my current last name, I don't know what I will do. I thin k professionally I want to stay me.
leesah85 Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?

YES. I am thrilled to be changing my name. Going from V to A is a HUGE jump in alphabet status lol.

Also, someone asked me if I was going to hyphenate. ARE THEY CRAZY?! My name is already 10 letters, what the heck do I need another 6 for?! I'm taking the 6 letter A last name and RUNNING with it.

I agree, the feminist in me wants to keep it, but at least all my degrees have my maiden name on them :) And for those legal buffs out there, a degree only becomes marital property if it was received AFTER the marriage, not before! oh i'm such a nerd...

Edited for spelling errors!
Danielle41209 Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?


Posted by haitianbeautie


Posted by Danielle41209


Posted by haitianbeautie

I particular want to hyphen my name....i like th sound of Dr. Raoul opposed to Dr. Louis>>>it sounds fake becuase i worked hard to be a Dr. as a Raoul not a Louis...Im weird.. I know....





So weird but my father's name is Raoul....spelled the same way.



HMMMMM. interesting....are you haitian...what is 'your father's first name?????



His first name is Raoul and his father (my grandfather) was of haitian descent
adelya21 Posted:

Re: Will you be changing your name?

I completely get what you are saying!!


Posted by JuneBride14


Posted by haitianbeautie

I particular want to hyphen my name....i like th sound of Dr. Raoul opposed to Dr. Louis>>>it sounds fake becuase i worked hard to be a Dr. as a Raoul not a Louis...Im weird.. I know....



ITA .. that is part of the reason my parents don't want me to change my name- they said I worked too hard for my doctorate with my current last name and will get my degree a month and a half before the wedding

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