Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

DonnaPWhite1124 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 04:29 PM

Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

Finally after a few months with all the drama going on with me and the church, I decided to go back to my old parish in Woodhaven.

The priest called me last night and FH and I have to meet him after Sunday morning mass (FH is gonna be but what ya gonna do)

Anyway, I dont know what to tell him about the living situation. We both live together, and I dont know if thats still a big deal because we're not celibate or whatev.

What did some of you guys say to the priest? Did he ask at all? Or should I tell him we co-habitate but we just dont do it (which to me seems wrong to lie yeah and like the priest is gonna believe me anyway)

MrsDtoBe09 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 04:31 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

He didnt ask but I put down my parents' address when I needed to write down my address. I figured I didnt lie... all of my mail goes there!

DonnaPWhite1124 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 04:34 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

I have no idea what to do. This bites.

Also I was worried they would ask this at Precana.

ttdiff11 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 04:34 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

Posted by MrsDtoBe09

He didnt ask but I put down my parents' address when I needed to write down my address. I figured I didnt lie... all of my mail goes there!

haha same here!!!!!!!!

rbjugdarro Posted: Mar 13, 2009 04:35 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

Im getting married in a catholic church and contrary to what most people think..the church has changed dramatically. Although we dont live together yet, my priest could care less. As long as you follow their procedures such as attend pre-cana (if it applies to you) or other classes and get the proper documents to them in time, my church could care less. Not sure if all catholic churches all the same though...

DonnaPWhite1124 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 04:37 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

I have no idea. He seemed really cool though but Im paranoid about it because the fr. is also the liturgy director of the Brooklyn Diocese...

angels914 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 04:52 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

Me and FH live together and have 4 kids ( we are both divorced ! ) The Church is not like it used to be years ago! I would not worry about a thing when meeting wtih the priest. If he does ask just be honest wtih him.

DonnaPWhite1124 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 04:53 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

Thanks Lisa. Youre right. Last thing I need is to lie to a priest.

kcreagh Posted: Mar 13, 2009 04:53 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

Posted by MrsDtoBe09

He didnt ask but I put down my parents' address when I needed to write down my address. I figured I didnt lie... all of my mail goes there!

That is what I plan on doing...have to meet with the priest next week

KYBride09 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:00 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

Hi there! I'm in Woodhaven too. What parish are you talking about?? FH and I live together and we had no problems with our priest. He's really nice!

DonnaPWhite1124 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:02 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

Posted by KYBride09

Hi there! I'm in Woodhaven too. What parish are you talking about?? FH and I live together and we had no problems with our priest. He's really nice!

HI! I am NOW getting married in St. Thomas the Apostle. How bout you?

I was originally supposed to have the ceremony at SMGH...but that changed.

ETA: you never know, churches might lurk here too.

KYBride09 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:04 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

OMG!!!! mee too!!!!!

I'm the weekend after yours

Do you live near?? We're starting precana next week.

krislee316 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:05 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

we didnt lie but they didnt give us a hard time he just raised his eyebrows at me and that was it

DonnaPWhite1124 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:06 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

FINALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY someone from WOODHAVEN!!!!!!!!!

I thought there would NEVER be anyone on here.

I live in Oz Pk now. But Im always in the WOO.

I have to jet send me FM maybe we know each other.

NikkiR515 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:07 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

We were honest.... We put down the same address and this was the basic conversation we had..

He said 'So... what do you think I am going to say about you two living together?'

Me 'Honestly I am afriad you wont marry us!'

Him: 'Are you kidding me?? I want to marry you guys as soon as possible so this wont continue!!'

Basically, I think honesty is your best policy but I could see some super strict priests being very preachy about it!

JennyAPH Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:10 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

I think it depends on how old fashioned they are... we told the deacon we met with we were living together and he said... 'cool..now don't tell anyone else that pretend you still live with your parents if anyone else asks'.. so I assume there could have been an issue. I don't know..

KYBride09 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:10 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

Posted by DonnaPWhite1124

FINALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY someone from WOODHAVEN!!!!!!!!!

I thought there would NEVER be anyone on here.

I live in Oz Pk now. But Im always in the WOO.

I have to jet send me FM maybe we know each other.

FutureMrsD09 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:11 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

We had no issues. When we first met with the priest, we gave him our home address where we live. He didn't ask us about it...it was pretty obvious! There's a section on FOCCUS for cohabitating couples, and in terms of pre cana, of the other 2 couples, one also lived together, and the other lived together and had a 10 month old son.

Don't worry! And honestly, if they hadn't accepted us, we would have gone elsewhere.

KYBride09 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:15 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

Tell him the truth... you'll be fine.

Sweetdee000 Posted: Mar 13, 2009 05:18 PM

Re: Women Getting Married in Catholic Church AND who live with their FH-I need your help please

I am getting married in a Catholic Church and I live with my future husband. We were nervous as well about what to say but we figured out it was better to tell the truth. Our deacon was very understanding and he actually seemed to notice the hesitation in our voice when we answered yes. He said right there that he wasnt here to judge us and he wants us to be open with him. He is actually very cool. Don't be worried. Just be open. It is better to tell the truth.