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Would you be upset if??
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Re: Would you be upset if??
don't stress it...ur wedding will be better bc u had time to think of the lil details.
thats what would make me feel better![]()
thats what would make me feel better
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Re: Would you be upset if??
I wouldn't be upset. Two months is a long time and it even slides into another season. I can see them wanting to get married this year without getting too close to the holidays.
Your wedding will continue to get the proper attention, especially since it's first![]()
Try to let it go![]()
Your wedding will continue to get the proper attention, especially since it's first
Try to let it go
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Re: Would you be upset if??
I hear you! I wouldn't let it get to you though. Your wedding is your wedding and in all honesty, no one really knows why they chose when they did...maybe it had no malicious intentions at all. We are going through the same thing with a couple right now but it sure isn't worth getting stressed over it. I am just working hard to make sure, my wedding is individualized...you know, just what WE want...not like we copied off of them in any way. And we are keeping things to ourselves.
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Re: Would you be upset if??
I understand how you feel...but actually, you can be thankful that they didn't try to squeeze their wedding in BEFORE yours. Take comfort in the fact that people have had more time to plan and prepare for your wedding and so, hopefully, it will mean that you will have the better turnout, and uh, everything else, if you know what I mean.
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Re: Would you be upset if??
I'm in the same boat, sort of. My FH brother got engaged around the same time as us and his wedding is a month before mine.
I think it's great though. All four of us get together and talk about our planning and the hell that is the RSVP deadline. So it's been great having someone go through it at the same time.
I think it's great though. All four of us get together and talk about our planning and the hell that is the RSVP deadline. So it's been great having someone go through it at the same time.
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Re: Would you be upset if??
I have been with my FH for almost 5 years. My lil sis met a guy and got engaged after being together for 10 months. She got married
this past February... I am getting married this September. She is still mad at me for getting married 7 months after her. She will not discuss my wedding with anyone! I don't understand?
Funny thing that happened... my FH husbands sister got engaged during this time and got married this past May.
I don't know.... It's def. not worth ruining a relationship over.
this past February... I am getting married this September. She is still mad at me for getting married 7 months after her. She will not discuss my wedding with anyone! I don't understand?
Funny thing that happened... my FH husbands sister got engaged during this time and got married this past May.
I don't know.... It's def. not worth ruining a relationship over.
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Re: Would you be upset if??
I don't think this is anything to get upset over at all. In your post most of the reasons you mentioned for why it upset you had to do with his family, and the burden on them. Don't worry about them, just worry about you! Your day will be your day regardless of who is married before or after, and who knows, maybe they were nice in giving you the two months in between, and not doing theirs earlier!
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Re: Would you be upset if??
Posted by JRG71
I have been with my FH for almost 5 years. My lil sis met a guy and got engaged after being together for 10 months. She got married
this past February... I am getting married this September. She is still mad at me for getting married 7 months after her. She will not discuss my wedding with anyone! I don't understand?
Same thing happened with my little sister. She got married in March. I am getting married in Sept. We will have been together for 7 1/2 years by the time the wedding comes. My sister was with him for 2 (engaged after 9 months!) She is not mad at me though,and I am not mad at her. I am paying for everything myself so my mom desont have to worry either.
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Re: Would you be upset if??
I don't think you should be upset....
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Re: Would you be upset if??
Posted by suven
I can understand why you're upset. I had a 2 year engagement. My dh's cousin proposed in Feb and they're getting married in November, on my MIL's birthday.
Even better than that, since we were having our wedding and a bunch of dh's Italian relatives flew in for our wedding. Well, his other cousin decided to baptise his son 7 days after our wedding, while we were away on our honeymoon, so that the Italian's could be there.
We got our invitation on June 4th. The RSVP date was June 1 (the postmark on the invite was June 2) and the baptism was June 6th.
I don't understand why them getting married on your MIL's birthday 6 months after your wedding would bother you?
The thing people don't get is you can't plan your wedding around everyone else. You have to do what is right for you. JMHO
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Re: Would you be upset if??
I honestly don't see what the big deal is. It's your wedding day not year. You don't know the reasoning behind why someone chose the date they chose, I wouldn't conclude that they're out to ruin anyone else's happiness.
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Re: Would you be upset if??
My brother and I were engaged 3 weeks apart. He's getting married this weekend and I'm getting married in October. I was upset at first too, but he;s getting married upstate and we're getting married on LI and we're having very different weddings. Any stress my parents are feeling is because FSIL is a Bridezilla not because the weddings are so close. Well, maybe they're also stressed that they're marrying off their only 2 within 3 months of each other ![]()
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Re: Would you be upset if??
I would not let it get to you!
That is nothing compared to my family!
DH and I got engaged and started a waterfall effect! As soon as we set our date, my sister got engaged, and my brother got engaged. My step brother was already engaged, but put his wedding off until we decided on a date.
Well our wedding was in May
Brother's wedding is in July
Step-Brother's wedding is in July
Sister's wedding is in September
Now that is stress on parents! and family!
But we are all going through with it and not letting it bother any of us. It is a happy time!!!!!!g
That is nothing compared to my family!
DH and I got engaged and started a waterfall effect! As soon as we set our date, my sister got engaged, and my brother got engaged. My step brother was already engaged, but put his wedding off until we decided on a date.
Well our wedding was in May
Brother's wedding is in July
Step-Brother's wedding is in July
Sister's wedding is in September
Now that is stress on parents! and family!
But we are all going through with it and not letting it bother any of us. It is a happy time!!!!!!g
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Re: Would you be upset if??
OH boy do I have alot to contribute!!!
I have been with FI for 2 years. We are getting married next june.
My older sister, after 4 months of dating her BF, announces her engagement right after my engagement party, and then plans a wedding to happen 6 months BEFORE mine. YES, it is upsetting!! (Not to mention a ridiculous burden on my father)
Granted, some of the people who replied 'Why should this upset you?' most likely have healthy relationships with their siblings and in-laws....or not, I don't know. But your reaction is bourne out of how you feel about the person planning the other wedding. I have heard of sisters who have double weddings and share their actual day of happiness...(you couldn't pay me!)
My older sister has been competitive with me from the day I was born. Who is taller, skinnier, faster, prettier, etc. When she found out I was getting married before her, she was extremley unsupportive and jealous, and now, will 'win' by getting married first. It's her decision to live her life on such petty terms, and I choose not to stoop to her level. I have had to learn to be the bigger person my whole life, this episode being the most challenging.
Most of my wedding planning is on hold while we plan hers... (I am being fitted for her BM's dress before I try on my wedding dress!) And yes, I am hurt, but there is nothing I can do...I chose a long enough engagement for her to squeeze a wedding in!
Of course I still love her, she is still my sister, and I am not holding this against her. BOTTOM LINE?: IT'S OKAY TO BE UPSET! But, IT IS NOT OKAY TO PUNISH THEM FOR THEIR BEHAVIOR! I don't think anyone is being selfish when they say it is hurtful to have to share wedding bliss...it is one of the only times we are meant to be in the center of attention, and having to share that is difficult.
Sorry about the BOOK I just wrote...this is something I feel passionately about, and understand that people who have not been through this have no idea how it can hurt!
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I have been with FI for 2 years. We are getting married next june.
My older sister, after 4 months of dating her BF, announces her engagement right after my engagement party, and then plans a wedding to happen 6 months BEFORE mine. YES, it is upsetting!! (Not to mention a ridiculous burden on my father)
Granted, some of the people who replied 'Why should this upset you?' most likely have healthy relationships with their siblings and in-laws....or not, I don't know. But your reaction is bourne out of how you feel about the person planning the other wedding. I have heard of sisters who have double weddings and share their actual day of happiness...(you couldn't pay me!)
My older sister has been competitive with me from the day I was born. Who is taller, skinnier, faster, prettier, etc. When she found out I was getting married before her, she was extremley unsupportive and jealous, and now, will 'win' by getting married first. It's her decision to live her life on such petty terms, and I choose not to stoop to her level. I have had to learn to be the bigger person my whole life, this episode being the most challenging.
Most of my wedding planning is on hold while we plan hers... (I am being fitted for her BM's dress before I try on my wedding dress!) And yes, I am hurt, but there is nothing I can do...I chose a long enough engagement for her to squeeze a wedding in!
Of course I still love her, she is still my sister, and I am not holding this against her. BOTTOM LINE?: IT'S OKAY TO BE UPSET! But, IT IS NOT OKAY TO PUNISH THEM FOR THEIR BEHAVIOR! I don't think anyone is being selfish when they say it is hurtful to have to share wedding bliss...it is one of the only times we are meant to be in the center of attention, and having to share that is difficult.
Sorry about the BOOK I just wrote...this is something I feel passionately about, and understand that people who have not been through this have no idea how it can hurt!
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Re: Would you be upset if??
Posted by ChristineC68
I wouldn't be upset. Two months is a long time and it even slides into another season. I can see them wanting to get married this year without getting too close to the holidays.
Your wedding will continue to get the proper attention, especially since it's first![]()
Try to let it go![]()
I agree... and give you some more of these......
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Re: Would you be upset if??
I put my wedding off for 6 months because my brother got engaged first and he waited a long time. It actually is upsetting to me as well. I think that because they are in different places you should not worry and understand that everyone has to live their own life. ![]()
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Re: Would you be upset if??
No matter what there is always going to be something that takes some of the spotlite off of you. Friends of ours got married in April and we got engaged in December... Instead of being excited for us I felt they thought we stole their thunder... in reality, we have been together a LOT longer, and had been participating in all of their wedding planning. Once we started our own, I felt like everything was a competition with them. Another friend of mine is getting engaged soon and I can't wait! I am looking forward to having someone else to talk about it with, I don't feel that she would be taking the spotlite away from me in any way!
I think everyone should just be happy that other people are finding happiness as well, and not worry so much about being the center of attention...
Good luck
I think everyone should just be happy that other people are finding happiness as well, and not worry so much about being the center of attention...
Good luck
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Re: Would you be upset if??
If his family doesn't care about the travel and such then you should not. I went thru similar to this. My brother got married in August and I got married in October...when my brother wasn't happy about me going first I waited til after his and they wound up being 2 months apart. My family was ok with 2 weddings, travel, showers, etc.
They were 2 separate wedding events and both very special. It was a matter of coincidence that my brother and I got married around the same time...it happens and really you should be happy. This is not about attention or taking away attention - it is about celebrating you love and commitment to each other in you own ways!
They were 2 separate wedding events and both very special. It was a matter of coincidence that my brother and I got married around the same time...it happens and really you should be happy. This is not about attention or taking away attention - it is about celebrating you love and commitment to each other in you own ways!
