My grandmother just found out that I had one two years ago and she is horrified. I feel that it was the right decision for my family. We have tried every kind of birth control with all different side effects. After three children, I feel like I am done with that part of my life. College alone is going to cost us well over 500k at this point. I can't understand why she is horrified. Birth Control is a 'Sin' whether it is the form of a tubal, pills or a condom.
Any thoughts???
alina
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
I wouldn't due to the permanence of the procedure.
michele31
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
Scott and I have discussed this. Since I will be giving birth and tubal ligation is major surgery we both feel that a snip-snip vacotomy that is done as an in-office procedure is the best thing for us to do when the time comes.
Maybe if I was having a scheduled c-section then I would have a tubal ligation since I was already opened. But I would never undergo major surgery when Scott can walk into a doctor's office and have a very easy procedure to produce the same results.
With that said I don't think you were crazy to do what you did. If you and your husband were happy with 3 children and made a decison to stop having children you deserve to make that decision.
Melissa427
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
Michele, DH and I feel exactly the same way.
allure
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
I agree 100% w/Michelle
Claud2001
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
Michele and I actually had this conversation the other day! I was considering it (after more kids, tho!), but then Michele informed me it is considered *major* surgery (which I was not aware). So, I would be in favor of DH getting a 'snip, snip' but we have not discussed any of these options just yet...we are not ready for 'permanent' BC.
mlp924
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
Thanks for all your thoughts. Michelle, everything you said made perfect sense. The reason I had the tubal is because my husband has been through major surgery several times due to diverticulitis complications. The tubal was an outpatient procedure done with a laser through the belly button. To be honest, I was sore in my shoulders because they pump some type of gas into your abdomen (sp?) and it settles in your shoulders. My belly button was fine.
Thanks for the responses ladies
Claud2001
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
They did your tubal as an outpatient, through your belly button??? Well, I guess that's not considered 'major' then, is it? Wow...maybe I need to look into this more when the time comes and see if it's an option for us.
mlp924
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
Yup. It was done under general anesthesia but I was in and out in 4 hours. The procedure takes under half an hour. My OB sliced 4 times in each tube and then cauterized each ending so they couldn't fuse back together somehow. He said that it is very unlikely I could have it reversed. Should Matt and I change our mind in the future, I would have to go IVF.
I used to work with a woman who had it after she had 2 children and they were killed in an accident...it was too sad...but she was still so young...
jlf41
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
Most tubals are done laparoscopically now - one small insicion in the belly button for the camera, two small incisions closer to the pelvis for the instruments. It takes about 1 hour to do the surgery. It is general anesthesia, which makes it major, but you usually go home same day. The gas they pump into your belly helps to see inside, and it does make you feel bloated (had lasparoscopy a while ago for another reason). You are sore for about a week- all of this is general, best case scenario of course.
Personally, I wouldn't do it only because of the what if factor. I also don't think my DH would have a vasectomy, although we never spoke about it. I think I will probably go with an IUD when I am ready to stop having babies.
It is the perfect choice for other people - absolutely no more worries. That is the beauty of having so many choices, something for everyone that works for them and their family.
kmcwed
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
I would definitely consider it. But I also think a vasectomy for DH sounds better! LOL. Honestly, though, vasectomies come with risks, too.
If I was 100% certain that I completed my family, I would consider some form of permanent sterilization.
kptoys
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
I would wait until I am done having babies. Even if I had it done at 40 that would be fine so I wouldnt have to worry about getting pregnant when I was 48.
I dont know if I could ever do it though. The thought of making a decision never to have any more kids is incomprehensible to me at this point.
BriarRose
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
I was origanally, but the more I thinnk about it,I decided against it.
After we have a second child DH will get his plumbing shut off.
I figure it's only fair that If I have to shoulder the burden of pregnancy, labor and delivery, the least he can do is get shut off.
Wendy
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
Not only would I, but I have. I had one at the age of 27 the same day that I had my son.
For me it was the right decision. I had originally planned on only 1 child, and had just gone back to college when I found out I was pregnant again. I knew that there was no way I wanted more than 2 kids and decided that a tubal was the way to go. Believe me my doctors tried to talk me out of it, especially because I was only 27. They too gave me the what if? question and my feeling is and still remains that you cannot replace one child with another. If, God forbid, something had happened to one of my children, having another would not lessen the pain nor make me feel any better. Also I really know myself. I know that I am not a 'baby person'. I love babies.... as long as they go home with someone else. That is why I originally only wanted 1 child. After much discussion they finally agreed to let me have the procedure.
I have never, not even for one moment, had a single regret about that decision. In fact I often say that it was the best decision I ever made. I never had to worry or feel any resentment over a pregnancy that I didn't want. I didn't have to wait every month with my fingers crossed hoping that I would get AF.
When I got divorced and starting dating again, I was very honest about the fact that I could have no more children. If that was a problem for anyone then they moved on. The man I did marry knew there were no kids in our future and he was fine with that,
I think it is a wonderful option for women to have available. I do think that you must consider it very carefully though and do what is right for you in your heart. It is not for everyone. By the way I also have 2 younger sisters who have done it also and they are both quite happy as well.
chmlengr
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
Posted by kptoys
I dont know if I could ever do it though. The thought of making a decision never to have any more kids is incomprehensible to me at this point.
I feel the same way. I don't think I am ready to make such a decision now, but when my time comes, I am still not sure I could go through with it, due to its permanency.
michele31
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Re: Would you consider having a tubal ligation?
29 years ago when my mom had it done- men didn't often have vacastomies then- the doctor tried for 2 months to talk her out of it. She was having her 3rd child in 5 years and was only 26 years old He actually refused to do it siting 'religious reasons' so his partner had to do it. The day after my sister was born, the nurses also tried to tell my mother what a HUGE mistake the operation was and on her way into surgery the doctor had the nurses pass the nursery and say 'do you realize you will never have another one?' etc... Her doctor also said, 'What if all of your children die in a fire or car accident? Then you will not be able to have more children' My mother looked at him and said, 'I will kill myself if that happens so that is not an issue anyway'.....
Of course, that was 29 years ago..but it is sad to think that doctors still use the same lines on women.