If the bride had the time to accept and open your gift, then she has to make tine to write a 'Thank You.'
I feel bad because I have terrible handwriting no matter how hard I try, but I think that my bad handwriting will be welcome if I write a nice personal note. I can make it legible, but it's not very pretty.
AnniesSS
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
Posted by Ang&Rich
I have to ask you all a question...what do you think about the following:
You go to a party and with the favor is a generic thank you card...same thing where it just says thanks and signed by the person. No card mailed after the gift is open...no personalized message.
Maybe a note attached to the favor - and then an additional personalized thank you card mailed after the shower. That would be ok.
Posted by halfpintny
I went to a shower where the BMs wrote out duplicate envelopes when sending out the invitations (one for the invite and one for the TY). And then put a stamp on it. When the shower was over all the bride had to do was write out the thank yous put them in their appropriate envelopes and pop them in the mail. I actually thought it was a really thoughtful touch on the part of the BMs to do this for a stressed out bride
That's not a bad idea at all!
KimberlyBride
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
I agree that is so tacky.
melijane
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
Not to piss anyone off but who cares'? If she sat and wrote a heartfelt message in each one would you save it, scrapbook it, show it to your grandchildren?? I keep reading on here about tackiness and it's getting kind of annoying. Why don't we all just do what we think is right and not judge other people who are 'supposedly' friends of ours(if you were invited top a wedding or shower you are probably friends) I plan on writing individual thank yous to all after my wedding but I don't care if some other bride doesn't!
AJsMommy122
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
Posted by melijane
Not to piss anyone off but who cares'? If she sat and wrote a heartfelt message in each one would you save it, scrapbook it, show it to your grandchildren?? I keep reading on here about tackiness and it's getting kind of annoying. Why don't we all just do what we think is right and not judge other people who are 'supposedly' friends of ours(if you were invited top a wedding or shower you are probably friends) I plan on writing individual thank yous to all after my wedding but I don't care if some other bride doesn't!
Actually we aren't even friends. She has a minimum to meet at her hall and since I am her mothers best friends daughter in law I luckily ( ) get to be invited. No I wouldn't scrapbook it or save it but you know what?? I spent $$$ on a gift. Took time out of my own life to pick it, wrap it, pick out a card, fill it out even if this was my best friend I would say it was tacky!!!!!
melijane
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
Hey to each his own.
isuser
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
i agree with melijane..
it's the right etiquette to send a gift when you are invited to a wedding or shower, and it is the right etiquette to personally write a thank you card to your guests.
but if someone don't give me a gift, it wouldn't bother me. the mere presence of the person at my wedding should be enough, no? you invite the guest so that s/he would be there to celebrate the special day with you and not for the gift.
and on the other side, now that i think back after seeing this post, i have been to quite a few weddings and showers that i never got a thank you card. i never even noticed it. as mentioned above, as a guest, i was there to celebrate the wonderful event, i don't need the thank you to make me feel better.
let's all be a bit more understanding and know that not everyone knows the etiquette for all things.
diamondgrlie
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
Uh oh... I only wrote a 'special' note to the people I am really close to.
simbacat
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
No, no, no. As much as they are a pain to write, you have to. It's just the polite thing to do. I'm in the middle of writing mine. So far I'm writing a few day. I'm trying to make them as personal as I can.
halfpintny
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
So what does this mean? As brides after the wedding we can all dispense with etiquitte and not do Thank You's? Well that doesn't make any sense! If someone sends you a gift you send a card thanking them.
Katherine121
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
Posted by isuser
i agree with melijane..
it's the right etiquette to send a gift when you are invited to a wedding or shower, and it is the right etiquette to personally write a thank you card to your guests.
but if someone don't give me a gift, it wouldn't bother me. the mere presence of the person at my wedding should be enough, no? you invite the guest so that s/he would be there to celebrate the special day with you and not for the gift.
and on the other side, now that i think back after seeing this post, i have been to quite a few weddings and showers that i never got a thank you card. i never even noticed it. as mentioned above, as a guest, i was there to celebrate the wonderful event, i don't need the thank you to make me feel better.
let's all be a bit more understanding and know that not everyone knows the etiquette for all things.
I agree. Well put.
isuser
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
nope, i don't mean anyone can or should 'dispense with etiquette and not do Thank You's', but i don't think people should be so sensitive or take it so personally either.
this, in my opinion is on the same level as you've helped someone and complain about it when the person does not thank you afterwards.
would it be nice to get a heartfelt thank you? oh most definitely, it's a very nice gesture! but let's think about WHY you give a gift!! not for the thank you, i hope.
also, please keep in mind that not EVERYONE knows what the proper etiquette is. i, for one, never knew that people would be so bothered by not getting a thank you card.
Edited for spelling...
dita531
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
I think that was rude! Any minute I get I've been writing my thank you cards! I would be so offended if someone sent me that.
curliegirl
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
Even if it takes longer to get them out, write the damn cards yourself!
Some people even give out the envelope for the guests to fill out themselves...a little tacky too, but not as much as that!!! EW!
Angel2006
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
That is terrible... If I were that busy I would still write someting personal even if it took me a little longer.
melijane
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
Just for the record, I wasn't really even talking about the 'right' thing to do just that I see at least 3 tacky posts a day. The world would be a better place if averyone wasn't such tighta@#!!!
eric'sbride
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
For those who do not like the word 'tacky', I have another: inconsiderate! If someone took their precious time and money and thought enough of me to get me a gift, it would be very inconsiderate for me not to thank them personally and specifically for the gift that they gave. I will be addressing the envelopes myself also. This is not about etiquette. It is about being truly grateful and expressing that gratitude. It is a sad world we live in when people are too busy to be truly thankful for what they have in their lives and have no time to express gratitude to the people that are a part of their lives.
naps627
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
I do not have good handwriting what so ever. So I have been typing them up on my computer and printing them out for my FH to hand write so that they look good. I also work 6 days a week but I am making a good effort to get them out before may 2nd because the shower was april 2nd and every thank you says something different. I think it is very nice to personalize a thank you. I do not complain about not having enough time that is a poor excuse and is very tacky to not somewhat personalize a thank you. shame on that bride.
Ang&Rich
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Re: How TACKY!!! I am disgusted!!!!!!!
Posted by melijane
Just for the record, I wasn't really even talking about the 'right' thing to do just that I see at least 3 tacky posts a day. The world would be a better place if averyone wasn't such tighta@#!!!
Where is all this anger coming from? We most certainly don't want you to feel slighted or angered by the things written here but of course all things must be taken with a grain of salt. If the 'tacky' posts bother you then it might be a good idea for you to ignore them.
We are all entitled to our opinions and I appreciate reading your however this seems to be going in a bad direction.
As I have said, I appreciate your opinion and have read your responses. Yes, people don't always know what the right thing to do is but in MY OPINION ignorance (or lazyiness) is not an acceptable excuse. People should find out what is required. You get a gift you say thank you in my honest opinion. Let me, the gift giver, know that you received it and that you appreciate it. I would and have done it in the past. So no, I do not think I am being a tight a$$ by expecting a thank you. And I'm not looking for the person to right a book but a simple thank you for the gift in their own handwritting mailed to me would be appreciated. It tells me that no matter how busy you may be you appreciated the gift and you took the time to say so. JMO
