XOXO

She isn't being nice.

I kinda had the same problem, EXCEPT FH wanted his parents name on it. I said they weren't hosting, but it was very important to himso we did:

Mr. & Mrs Brad Pitt
invite you to share in the marriage of ther daughter

Eleanor Susan

to

Matthew Peter

Son of

Mr. and Mrs. Nothelpingatall.


I mean the wording is different. This way their names are on it and it's not saying their hosting.

I agree with you. I am in a similar situation . I feel like she had no interest at all in the planning and she is not hosting the party. I will go as far as saying 'along with their parents' but no names will be on the invite.

How does your fi feel about it?

I totally understand how you feel.. believe me. I wouldn't want their names on my invites either Unfortunately in my family, it is considered 'disrespectful' if the parent names are not on the invites regardless of who is paying for the wedding. I know... these stupid 'traditional' rules are insane. I agree with you.

I hope you find a happy medium to settle this conflict. MILs could be PITAs!!!

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Posted by esb980

She isn't being nice.

I kinda had the same problem, EXCEPT FH wanted his parents name on it. I said they weren't hosting, but it was very important to himso we did:

Mr. & Mrs Brad Pitt
invite you to share in the marriage of ther daughter

Eleanor Susan

to

Matthew Peter

Son of

Mr. and Mrs. Nothelpingatall.


I mean the wording is different. This way their names are on it and it's not saying their hosting.

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If you do it like this it will not appear that they are hosting or paying and it might save some hard feelings-you will have to deal with her for the rest of of your life.

It was childish of her to make that statement - it would have been much nicer if she just asked.

Neither parents are hosting our wedding b/c they are not paying for it. So just FH and my name are on the invite. Noone complained about it though because they understood. And if they didnt oh well too bad. U are going to find that a lot of people are going to threaten to not come to your wedding. U know what I say. Screw em

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Posted by esb980

She isn't being nice.

I kinda had the same problem, EXCEPT FH wanted his parents name on it. I said they weren't hosting, but it was very important to himso we did:

Mr. & Mrs Brad Pitt
invite you to share in the marriage of ther daughter

Eleanor Susan

to

Matthew Peter

Son of

Mr. and Mrs. Nothelpingatall.


I mean the wording is different. This way their names are on it and it's not saying their hosting.

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Yea, this is what we are doing/

Our parents did not host the reception, but we had both their names on it as a show of respect to them.

Sorry to disagree, but some of the ettiquette rules are meant to be flexible. I wanted both parents names as a representation of their blessing of us getting married.

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Posted by MayBride06

I am sure that i am in the minority here, but I'll tell you what I think anyway. I think both parents names should be on the invite. It may not be 'etiquette' but you are marrying their son, therefore, his parents names should be on the invite. I think it's just courtesy and should have nothing to do with finances. i think that you will have plenty of other fights with your IL's why start the marriage off with this one? JMHO

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You're not the minority - I agree completely.

I didn't put either names- even though my Dad paid- ( He didn't want just his name b/c my Mom passed away)

so we did - together with their familes

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Posted by ChrissynRicky

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Posted by MayBride06

I am sure that i am in the minority here, but I'll tell you what I think anyway. I think both parents names should be on the invite. It may not be 'etiquette' but you are marrying their son, therefore, his parents names should be on the invite. I think it's just courtesy and should have nothing to do with finances. i think that you will have plenty of other fights with your IL's why start the marriage off with this one? JMHO

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You're not the minority - I agree completely.

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I so agree.

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Posted by Mrs. Powell

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Posted by ChrissynRicky

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Posted by MayBride06

I am sure that i am in the minority here, but I'll tell you what I think anyway. I think both parents names should be on the invite. It may not be 'etiquette' but you are marrying their son, therefore, his parents names should be on the invite. I think it's just courtesy and should have nothing to do with finances. i think that you will have plenty of other fights with your IL's why start the marriage off with this one? JMHO

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You're not the minority - I agree completely.

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I so agree.

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I was going to say this earlier - but I didn't want to get flamed. No one is helping us with $$, but my invitation reads 'together with their families'....why not pay homage to them - they put us here??

Just my opinion. I know my FIL's will be flattered by the respect.

JMO - My parents are footing the whole bill, there the ones that deserve the credit ....if my FIL's were helping in ANYWAY I would be more then happy to put there names on them

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Posted by carlsbride

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Posted by esb980

She isn't being nice.

I kinda had the same problem, EXCEPT FH wanted his parents name on it. I said they weren't hosting, but it was very important to himso we did:

Mr. & Mrs Brad Pitt
invite you to share in the marriage of ther daughter

Eleanor Susan

to

Matthew Peter

Son of

Mr. and Mrs. Nothelpingatall.


I mean the wording is different. This way their names are on it and it's not saying their hosting.

---

If you do it like this it will not appear that they are hosting or paying and it might save some hard feelings-you will have to deal with her for the rest of of your life.

It was childish of her to make that statement - it would have been much nicer if she just asked.

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That is exactly how we are wording our invitations and FI's parents aren't paying for anything either.

I agree that it was childish as well. Maybe had she asked instead of demanding you wouldn't be so angry.

I understand what you're saying about why they should not be on the invite when they are not contributing or helping.

But, even though we are paying for it ourselves, we put both parents names out of respect to both families. It's not a matter of a financial issue for us, it's a matter of we want to show that it is the joining of both families. My FMIL saw the invitation and was honored that we thought to have their names on it.

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Posted by Mrs. Powell

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Posted by ChrissynRicky

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Posted by MayBride06

I am sure that i am in the minority here, but I'll tell you what I think anyway. I think both parents names should be on the invite. It may not be 'etiquette' but you are marrying their son, therefore, his parents names should be on the invite. I think it's just courtesy and should have nothing to do with finances. i think that you will have plenty of other fights with your IL's why start the marriage off with this one? JMHO

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You're not the minority - I agree completely.

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I so agree.

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Ditto - my FH's parents arent paying but I would never not include them on the invitation because they raised a wonderful son and they deserve some recognition. In this situation, I dont think its a battle worth fighting but if you do than you have the right to do whatever you want. If you dont want your future in laws to be on the invitation then dont have them. However, you cant blame them for being upset about it.