x

Ok so my fh and I just set our date so we haven't figured out all of the details yet but we don't want to include children in our reception. I have a very big family and a lot of my cousins have children so we decided that it would be best not to invite young children to our reception. I have a younger brother and sister who are 8 and 5 and they will be in our wedding party. We also want to include our best friend's son in our wedding party but that is it. My fh's aunt sent me a message today expressing how excited they are for us and our wedding and that their 6 year old daughter cannot wait to attend and dance the night away. I do not want to be rude or offend anyone. How do I go about this without upsetting anyone?

x

My cousin asked me if her daughter, who will be 3 years old when I get married, is invited. I told her that we decided not to have any kids at our wedding because we want all the adults to have a good time and a carefree day. She understood. And it's not like you can invite your aunt's daughter can be invited and not invite any other kids. Maybe have your FH speak to his mom and ask his mom to mention to the aunt that you're not inviting any kids?

x

I too decided not to have kids. My FSIL has two little girls but she will be in my bridal party and I want her and her husband to enjoy the day, have some drinks, eat and dance. I don't think you have to necessarily
say anything now but make sure it's clear about no kids when the time comes and deal with each situation as it comes. I am putting 'adult reception' on our invites and when people RSVP if anyone adds children I will call and explain that there are too many to have and because of cost we decided to let the adults enjoy alone. You could also advise a family member to 'spread the word' good luck! I think all no-children brides will need it.

x

There will be 3 kids at our wedding and its immediate family's children only. And that's how we are explaining it.. Don't worry that your friends kid isn't family, I would say it anyway

x

I am doing the same thing.. The only children under 17 years old invited to the wedding are the 3 little boys in the wedding party. There are tons of kids in our families and a lot of his friends are married with multiple children. The parents of these children are even in our wedding party and they aren't invited. One of my cousins is a single dad and the only people he has available to babysit are invited to the wedding, also. He missed the engagement party due to this... Same with a long time family friend. He came to the eparty solo because his wife had to stay home with the children. When you make a decision like this, it's hard. You have to stick to it, though, and make no exceptions because you will offend more people that way. We are writing the invitations out specifically to 'Mr. & Mrs. Smith', or if Mr. & Mrs. 'Smith' has a six year old and an eighteen year old (let's name her Julie) we'd address it to 'Mr. & Mrs. Smith & Julie' or 'Mr. & Mrs. Smith Ms. Julie Smith' to make it clear. We aren't afraid to outright tell people (politely, of course) because we know the rule stands for everyone except for the children who are part of the wedding.
HTH =D

x

I'm not inviting kids to our wedding, but I my cousins twin boys (6 y/o) will be included at the church, but they are going to stay home with a babysitter during the reception. Trust me, nobody should get too upset about it. If anything, my cousin was so relieved that she could enjoy herself and not have to watch her kids all night!

x

We are doing a 21+ reception. The ONLY exceptions are our niece and nephew, who will be 1 1/2 and 3 1/2 by then. We feel that we don't have to explain why they will be invited and not anybody else under 21.

x

I think most people should understand the adult only thing. We are also only having immediate family children at the wedding, and we really don't even want to do that. I just wouldn't feel right not inviting some of my cousins to my own wedding. Address the invite to her and her husband, and if a question comes up, explain your reasoning. This can be difficult, but on the other hand some people don't want the burden of bringing a child and having to leave earlier than expected!

x

we arent having any children..not even a ring bearer or flower girl. i was thinking of putting on the invitation 'adult reception' but i dont know if that sounds rude

x

I'm not having any kids from my end because I don't have the space but FH does and will have children from his side. On the invite, I plan yo write (# seats have been reserved in your honor) that way they decide which two from their family they want to invite. Our guest list would jump to 300 if I included all the kiddies from my side :(

x

I'm inviting all the kids from my side however Fmil doesn't want us to invite the kids free her side. I told Fh it's up to him.
I don't think it's rude to write adult reception on the invitation
It will probably save you aggravation.

Re: ?

---

Posted by brads girl

we arent having any children..not even a ring bearer or flower girl. i was thinking of putting on the invitation 'adult reception' but i dont know if that sounds rude

---

same thing with us! I will not be a happy bride if children start showing up. I also read on a website that you could call your guests with children and say 'A bunch of people have been asking if children are invited because the invite wasn't clear so we just wanted to make sure everyone knows that we won't be having children at the reception.' and you could have MOH or your mom do this if it's family/friends

x

Thanks everyone!! I like the idea of writing adult reception on the invitation, as well as having my FMIL explain to her sister that we decided against having children at our recpetion

x

I am doing only my ring bearer and flower girl they will be 2 and 4!! It's my niece and nephew the ONLY kids invited and then me and my FH have a few teen cousins but only first cousins under 21

x

I am not inviting any children besides my niece who will be my flower girl and a few of FH's teenage cousins. Honestly, the little kids that we know are so out of control. I feel like they would totally ruin the wedding.

I haven't thought about what I'm going to write on the invitation yet but I think writing adult reception is totally fine.

x

I looked at past wedding invitations that I have. Most of them say 'Join us for an adults only reception'. That seems adequate to me. That is what I will be putting on mine.

x

I'm also having an adults only reception. Like some of the other girls mentioned, the only children are the children of immediate family and I don't feel like I should have to explain myself to distant relatives or friends with children. I don't think they would require one anyway. I feel like adults only receptions are fairly common.

I saw a good wedding invitation template. For the RSVP card, you can write 'Number of Adults attending _____ ' It leaves no room for confusion.