Feeling Down/Vent

I just spoke to my mother and she asked what I was doing this weekend. I told her I was going to see Dad and Uncle Mike (my parents are divorced and my dad lives in VA, he's going to be in NY visiting his brother) and she got all pissy. My dad and sisters are not close, this has been going on since we were all kids, there is a very long story behind that, but basically both of my sisters and my dad are too sturburn to change things. My dad has been a wonderful loving father to me, I moved in with him when I was 16 and because of his love and guidance I am the person I am today. Not to say my mom isn't a good parent, she's wonderful too, but I was always a 'daddy's girl'. Anyway, she feels it's unfair for me to see him when my sisters don't. We are all adults now, 30, 28 and 26. We have different personalities and because of that we have different relationships. I love my sisters, but we are not clones and because they are not close to my father doesn't mean that I shouldn't be. My parents split up when I was 3 and for the last 25 years I've had to listen to stupid comments from both sides, but it seems that since my dad remarried and had kids with my stepmom, my mother has gotten worse. My dad has been married for 15 years and my mom was annoyed that my stepfamily was at the wedding. I spent more time with my stepgrandmother than I ever did with my real one. It's so stupid!!! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

LOL - if for no other reason, I swear not to get divorced so I don't drive my kids crazy with this nonsense.

Kelly

Re: Feeling Down/Vent

I'm sorry you have to deal with this... many hugs to you!

Re: Feeling Down/Vent

So sorry to hear that Kelly! Things with family can be soo tough at times! Sounds like you are dealing with it the best you can. I think stuff with parents can be hard (at least for me) since I used to think they were perfect or always right and then I finally realized and admiited to myself they are not and sometimes I deal with things in a more mature way and a way that is better for me!!!

Re: Feeling Down/Vent

Sorry to hear things are so tough
I would continue what you are doing in a consistent pattern. Now that you are married, u r going to have to develop strong skills and ways of establishing a relationship between you and your mother and you and your father. Dont let people make decisions for you. You are on the right track and have a clearer mind that most people in your situation. Keep your head up!

Re: Feeling Down/Vent

Thats a tough one. It doesn't sound like it has nothing to do with you directly - but your mothers own problems with your father. Its unfair of her to put you in this position...

I would talk to her - tell her how it makes you feel when she acts pissy when he comes up. She may not listen and may get defensive, but getting it off your chest will help, and you never know...she may 'hear' some of it and tone it down.

Good Luck