Now that you're married--

Do you find it hard to hang out with your single friends?

My BFF is on her quest for 'the one'. When she meets a guy she tends to obsess over him, and asks me for my advice, yet never takes it.

Last week, after we went out for drinks, she made me come with her as she did a 'drive by' at 2:30 in the morning and then obsessed over whose car was in front of the guys house.

I just feel like now that I'm married, my tolerance for this is so much lower.

Not only that, when she does ask me for advice, I feel like its been SO long since I've been dating I have no idea what to say. I usually just tell her to stop obsessing and worrying about every little detail.

I'd honestly rather hang out with couples than my single friends, and I feel bad about. I was wondering if anyone else felt like this.

Re: Now that you're married--

So funny i make sure to have a mix of singles & married friendsout all together. So much better

Re: Now that you're married--

I kind of feel the same way....I dont have too many single friends though.
...........I do have one friend who obsesses over jerk heads that treat her like crap and she puts up with it and cries all the time....i keep telling her to leave and take care of herself first then a guy will 'fall' into place, shes also a lil obsessive with guys as well....i have NO tolerance for this garbage...i just let her be and when she calls me she calls

Re: Now that you're married--

For me it is a bit different....I have a lot of single friends who are my age and younger, and DH & I have married friends who are mainly older than us.....

Most of my friends really enjoy getting together for dinner and drinks and it is more of a group atmosphere, guys and girls.

Sooo since DH works two jobs, you will most likely see me hanging out with our single friends. And even when he is off from work that is who we tend to hang out more with our single friends.

I just find that our married friends are not as available to hang out. We probably hang out with them like once a month.

Re: Now that you're married--

Everyone in our circle of friends pretty much has a sig other, or is engaged or married so we dont really have the single friends issue... thank god, bc i too do not have the tolerance for the 'oh i went out with this guy... he said this... what could it mean.. do you think we should continue dating etc etc... and i agree with you... the advice is hardly ever taken

Re: Now that you're married--

really none of my friends are single but I find it hard to stay out partying like I use to....that could be because I am getting older not because I am married but whatev!

Re: Now that you're married--

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Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

Everyone in our circle of friends pretty much has a sig other, or is engaged or married so we dont really have the single friends issue... thank god, bc i too do not have the tolerance for the 'oh i went out with this guy... he said this... what could it mean.. do you think we should continue dating etc etc... and i agree with you... the advice is hardly ever taken

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exactly what i would have written (thanks )

Re: Now that you're married--

DH & I have A LOT of single friends...they will have a boyfriend or girlfriend here or there and we have some engaged or married friends


BUT



its weird sometimes DH & I feel closer and have more in common with our single friends than our married ones. We just aren't in the same place as a lot of the married couples we know.

Re: Now that you're married--

For the most part our friends are all mixed. We have more friends who are single I think. I think its harder on them then me because they want to find someone to settle with. It does make it hard to fathom having kids because I know that will change the dynamic of our friendships, but I found my guy, I don't want to wait while they find theirs.

What's harder for us is the people who own houses verse those who don't. We have to budget our money a lot more, especially on one steady income and that makes it tough.

Re: Now that you're married--

So glad you posted this, I feel the same way.
I totally relate to the 'tolerance' thing too.

Re: Now that you're married--

not really...we have a lot of single friends as well as a lot of friends in relationships or engaged. only a few of our friends are actually married. i dont feel any differently towards the single friends now that I am married.

Re: Now that you're married--

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Posted by MrsC2010

not really...we have a lot of single friends as well as a lot of friends in relationships or engaged. only a few of our friends are actually married. i dont feel any differently towards the single friends now that I am married.

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Same here on all accounts. My friends were there for me while I was dating and stuff; if they're still single, I'm totally there for them during that part of life.

Re: Now that you're married--

Most of my friends & our friends are married & a lot of them have children already. (Friends with kids it a whole other topic.) DH friends (the guys) are the single ones.
We don't find it hard to hang out with them because we are so use to them being single. We do find it hard not having another young newly married couple to do things with.

Re: Now that you're married--

I have a friend like that. She tries to pull me into all her drama. Making phone calls for her, facebook stalking, doing drive bys, etc. But I don't think it's because she's single, but mostly because she's a little loony. God knows I never went to that extent when I was single. And none of my other single friends do that! But I get what you mean. It's hard to dole out advice when she won't even help herself. I've just stopped giving advice and just being there to listen when she needs to b!tch!

Re: Now that you're married--

nothing about our hanging out habits have changed since we got married... so no

Re: Now that you're married--

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Posted by AngnShaun

nothing about our hanging out habits have changed since we got married... so no

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same for us!

Re: Now that you're married--

I wouldn't have tolerated 2:30am drive-bys and obsessing BEFORE I was married...so I definitely don't now lol.

I have a mix of friends and I love them all...their marital/dating status doesn't affect our friendships.

Re: Now that you're married--

I have this same exact problem. I want to stay in more or hang out in a totally different place than 3 of my single friends...I dont want to go out and be drunk/crazy...there's no point and I can't handle the unneccesary calories!

Re: Now that you're married--

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Posted by MikesBride2B

I wouldn't have tolerated 2:30am drive-bys and obsessing BEFORE I was married...so I definitely don't now lol.

I have a mix of friends and I love them all...their marital/dating status doesn't affect our friendships.

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yeah!!!

what she said

Re: Now that you're married--

All of our friends are single..when I go out with gfs they always talk to guys and when I am with them I feel weird..I mean ill talk to them but they soo see my ring and even ask questions but the grls are there to flirt..also guys like to by girls drinks and I think they only buy me a drink bc they cnt buy them without buying the married girls..

I also changed a lot since I got married..I like to go out but once I'm not I am almost ready to go home...I try not to get to drunk bc I dnt want to feel like sh it next morning and also I dnt have a lot of money to blow..

Dh friends are alllll single and they always trying to get girls...he deff doesn't have great time when I'm not withj him