Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
Misty
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Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
Someone in my family has made sport of sending out a mass email to the whole family every holiday season, containing lists made up by their children, of items they picked from the Toys R Us Holiday Big book. They send the lists out, with prices, asking that they be notified when someone purchases something off the list so that they can avoid duplicates.
Thoughts?
Shamma's Secret Santa
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
it doesn't seem any different then a bridal registry to me. I guess it takes the surprise out, but you're not obligated to buy off the list. And at least kids get what they want, rather then endless returns.
Making a list for 'santa' is an age-old tradition.
ChristineC68
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
While it is very thoughtful of the parents to provide this information to you, I am sure the recipients of this wish list are quite capable of picking appropriate gifts.
This is actually I pet peeve I have.
The first year DH & I were together he asked his brother for a list of some things that his niece & nephew may like. They sat these two kids down with that toy cataloge and presented the whole catalogue to DH. DH being super generous to people he loves BOUGHT EVERY DAM THING THEY WANTED. I was floored!! We are talking 6 dolls, 5 trucks, etc. I was like, can we get them a book or a puzzle?
It wasn't the money but what kid NEEDS to have several hundreds of dollars worth of toys for Christmas? What kind of message is being sent when they get every thing they asked for?? Wouldn't putting $500 in a bank account for them serve them better in the future? (This would still leave money left over for toys!)
Misty
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
What kind of message is being sent when they get every thing they asked for??
This is exactly my issue Christine. I know that lists for Santa is an age old tradition, but I think it's become 'expected' that kids will get everything they want on these lists. I guess I just wish for a little humility in the requests, like a phone call saying 'hey Sally and Bobby really want such and such for Christmas..', instead of an email saying 'let me know what you buy because I don't really want to spend the time at the store returning stuff. IMO, too bad ya know?
One glaring incident that stands out in my mind is when one child in my family threw a gift I gave him on the floor and said 'well, this wasn't on my list so it's going back', and started tearing into the next present. It just seems like evidence of a really spoiled generation rearing it's ugly head in my family.
wacky
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
I call my cousin and ask what do the kids want, but is she sent me a list Id tell her to go scratch
Kids are so freaking spoiled these days
KathleenG
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
That sort of thing annoys me. My parents taught me never to expect a gift, even though 99% of the time children will always receive them. I think adults are more than capable of making their own decisions regarding what to get children. I don't need anyone telling me what to buy their kids unless I specifically ask them. JMO
jenny11.9
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
thoughts? is that this is RIDICULOUS. FIRST of all - do these presents get put under the tree as if santa has brought them? In my opinion, that is the only way this is even halfway acceptable and I still hate the idea. I know my sister has 4 kids and Christmas can get really pricey. She has shared the Santa list with my mom and her sisters and we have all purchased a small item off that to help her out a little and it goes under the tree from Santa. But in no way did the kids think they wrote a list that 'Aunt Jenny' picks from.
I think it's an awful habit for children to expect gifts from family members based on their 'wish list'. That is not what the holiday is about. They should be writing a list of little items THEY can give to OTHERS like a chocolate bar or a little hand made ornament - and save their 'wish list' for Santa, and Santa will bring what he can each year. When I was little, I got to put down 5 things I wanted from Santa and that was it. And we weren't permitted to ask other people for stuff for Christmas.
JMO - sorry that got me kind of worked up. I just hate that some people totally lose the meaning from so early on with their children. I always admire my sister's kids - that they give out their gifts before they open ONE thing. They honestly believe that to give is to receive. She did a great job.
Misty
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
My parents taught me never to expect a gift, even though 99% of the time children will always receive them.
Agreed!
I don't need anyone telling me what to buy their kids unless I specifically ask them.
Agreed again!
Misty
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
When I was little, I got to put down 5 things I wanted from Santa and that was it. And we weren't permitted to ask other people for stuff for Christmas.
Jenny, this is exactly what I plan on telling my kids!!!
LisaT
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
I think the way its being distributed in your family is rather tacky, but I don't have issues with the idea of wish lists (as long as they are 'wishes' not EXPECTATIONS).
From your examples Misty, it definitely seems like the lists are giving the wrong idea to the kids, and thats sad.
For those that are against lists, is it lists/registries in general or christmas lists or children's lists?
ChristineC68
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
I was against DH's brother giving us a ridiculous list and DH's insistance that his niece and nephew get everything that was on this ridiculous list.
In Misty's case, I find the distribution of this list a bit over the top.
I am not against lists or registries in general, of course the reason to buy a gift in the first place is for the recipients enjoyment.
For kids we usually ask for an idea of what they like (if we don't know the child so well) and go from there.
reallybehind!
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
what are the kids told when they make up the list though? is it just make a list of some stuff you'd like for christmas or are they led to believe they will get everything they want? kids always make lists and i don't think they necessarily expect everything to be bought, they'd just like it. same as a bridal registry imo.
i don't know i just don't really see anything wrong with it. i hate shopping and i really appreciate it when people make a list for me. for instance this year my family all did amazon wish lists. i don't see anything wrong with it. i don't expect to get everything, or even anything on the list, but at least it gives people ideas. then again whenever you ask my niece and nephew what they want they can't think of anything so.... maybe they're a bit different than the kids you mentioned.
and i can see the mother's point about not wanting to buy duplicates, she's already got enough to deal with having several children, who wants to waste time returning stuff when there's such an easy solution? i always email my sil when i buy the kids things so that she doesn't buy it also.
Jordan
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
Hmmmm...it seems very organized and possibly slightly presumptuous - it sounds like a bridal registry.
Personally, I appreciate lists. I don't have kids and don't always know what to buy our nieces & nephew's.
eroxgirl
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
We got a message from one of FH's little sisters (she's 11) asking us for a set a books for christmas and the ONLY reason it didn't bother me is because at least she wants to read. I was also taught not to ask for anything and certainly not to expect anything. IMO, for a child to give a list to their parents is one thing, but I don't think its right to give it out like that. When I don't know what to buy someone's child I usually just call their mother and ask, otherwise I'll give what I want to give.
Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
I think it depends on the relationship...
I can see my sister and I doing this for our kids...I know my mom and her siblings would get together with the 'Christmas lists'
but I welcome the idea of people telling me what to get them...
jenny11.9
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
For those that are against lists, is it lists/registries in general or christmas lists or children's lists?
Just this childrens Christmas list thing makes me nuts. Registries should be for weddings, showers and that type of thing.
I also do think that the relationships matter though - I got the impression that this was kind of random e-mail to family in a broad sense. I totally don't think it's problematic if a sister sends another sister a short list of things the kids want to make it easier- that's a lot different.
IrishTracy
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
I think if you asked for an idea on what they would like it's fine. but to just send it out....kinda rude!
Being a Mom I only tell them what my son doesn't need! In other words 'NO MORE STUFFED ANIMALS!!' & 'If it doesn't have a volume control I don't want to see it! '
Julybaby
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
I think a mass email to everyone in the family is a bit over-the-top. It sounds like a Christmas registry. Since I was a teen, everyone in my family has created Christmas lists, more so my parents can get an idea what we wanted. As a teenager, we were very picky about clothes and they wanted to get us something that we would wear. But these lists served as a guideline and we certainly didn't expect to receive everything on the list. Even today, at the age of 32, we exchange lists for Xmas. They help give my parents ideas. I also ask for lists from my parents, so I have ideas on what to get them. My DH's family don't use lists at all, and I'm constantly racking my brain trying to figure out what to get them for Hannukah.
It's one thing if a Xmas list serves as a guideline, but another if it becomes like a registry. I also think that to notify the parents when you buy a gift is tacky. Duplicates are not the worst thing in the world. And how will the kids respond if they receive a gift that was not on their list?
Wendy
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Re: Your thoughts on childrens gift lists and parents proliferation of them? lol.
I used to buy for all my neices and nephews and my sisters and brother bought for my kids, but we never ever sent out a list! We asked each other what the kids wanted, but a lot of times we bought something else instead. We did let one another know though so that if there was something a child really, really wanted someone got it for them.We kept a price limit of $20-25 dollars because with so many children spending more than that would bankrupt us all. Even at that it got just too expensive to buy for everyone.
Last year we started a new tradition. We pick a name or names out of a hat (how ever many children you have is the amount you have to buy for) and we buy only for that child or children. The limit is $50.00 per child. You can either buy one gift or more, but no exceeding that amount. The kids were a little surprised that they didn't get as many gifts, but they seemed to really appreciate what they did get.
I think kids get way too much and begin to expect it every year and from everyone. A little moderation is a wonderful thing!!!
