Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
Original post by Summer07Bride
The other day I was talking to my girlfriend and she was commenting on how only one of her bf's friends had 'cut the cord' and moved out of his parents' house. Her bf is 25. I then replied with 'well if I didn't get married, I would probably still be at home as well' She was obviously appalled by this response. She replied with 'Well then when would you move out? Eventually you have to move on and get your own place. If not now, when? 30, 35, 40?' While this is a good question, I just always had a decent home life and for me the best decision really was to live at home and save money so that when I did eventually move out I would have money saved and I would not have to struggle every month to make sure I could pay rent or perhaps just put on down payment on a home..
I thought this was an interesting conversation - so any thoughts?
joan_db
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
Posted by ant n tilde
There is an italian saying that your daughter leaves the house in a white dress or in a coffin - its kind of vulgar but no one in my family moved out ( except for college ) until they were married
We're not Italian but we do/believe the SAME thing. Even now that I'm married, both our parents wouldn't mind us living with them but we choose not to.
znycgirl
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
OK, OK, OK.... I agree...there are personal circumstances, ect.
But... in my experience GUYS get a little strange if they don't move out at least for a while when they get to their 30s. They need to learn how to do their own underwear/cooking at some point in their life. GIRLS are a little different. They tend to live with family...but do their own laundry/cooking/ect.
Daisy Bride
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
it depends on how much your parents annoy you no - i loved my parents & it was good living at home but i got out at 22, I just wanted to be independent (and poor)
vintagegirl
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
Long Island is expensive.. thats one factor.. I moved out when I got a stable job.. so it all depends.. I was 27 when I moved out of my moms house.. so 2.5 years ago. Dh was 30 when he moved out..
BoxOfRocks
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
Posted by PeteysBride
Posted by AeroJenn
This is a good question. OKay, for me, I moved out and into my own apartment at 19. I moved back in with my parents at 20. Reason being was money -- it was just too expensive for me to live on my own and go to school at the same time.
However, if DH and I hadnt gotten married right out of college and I had gotten a full-time job right away....I wouldve been in my own place again as soon as I could afford it. I love my parents and dont mind living with them....its just that I believe once a child can afford to live on their own, they should do so. Otherwise, you're just prolonging the act of growing up. Its a natural step in life.
I look at all of our friends who arent married yet -- they're all living at home with parents still....at 23. I mean, c'mon. They have full-time, good paying jobs. They could easily own apartments and live on their own. Instead they're mooching off their parents by not paying for rent or food, having their parents do their laundry.....i mean....grow up. It creates a dependancy for both the parents and the children.
Same here.
I agree. I'm OOT and there are few people in my area who live with their parents after college. I was one of the few and moved out at 24, later than I would have liked and against my parents' wishes.
As far as cost, I'm interested in hearing more about this as I'm OOT. I can understand someone in the five boroughs having to live at home due to exhorbitant cost, but in the suburbs? How much is a typical 1 BR apartment per month in LI?
bluegreen08
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
Posted by BoxOfRocks
I agree. I'm OOT and there are few people in my area who live with their parents after college. I was one of the few and moved out at 24, later than I would have liked and against my parents' wishes.
As far as cost, I'm interested in hearing more about this as I'm OOT. I can understand someone in the five boroughs having to live at home due to exhorbitant cost, but in the suburbs? How much is a typical 1 BR apartment per month in LI?
I currently live OOT and the cost of living is way lower than on LI, and there are many more apartment options. One of my friends (still on Long Island) really wants to move out of her parents house but there are very few apartments. There are condos that are very expensive, and a few apartments here and there (also expensive) but most 'apartments' are really the basement or upper level of someone's house. A few of my friends are doing that, but I would feel uncomfortable doing so. Other cities have many more 'real' apartments.
BoxOfRocks
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
Posted by bluegreen08
I currently live OOT and the cost of living is way lower than on LI, and there are many more apartment options. One of my friends (still on Long Island) really wants to move out of her parents house but there are very few apartments. There are condos that are very expensive, and a few apartments here and there (also expensive) but most 'apartments' are really the basement or upper level of someone's house. A few of my friends are doing that, but I would feel uncomfortable doing so. Other cities have many more 'real' apartments.
Interesting. Thanks for your reply. So, would a 1 BR rented condo be in the neighborhood of $2K per month? Is the group house setup common?
micknjohn
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Member since
Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
Posted by PeteysBride
Posted by AeroJenn
This is a good question. OKay, for me, I moved out and into my own apartment at 19. I moved back in with my parents at 20. Reason being was money -- it was just too expensive for me to live on my own and go to school at the same time.
However, if DH and I hadnt gotten married right out of college and I had gotten a full-time job right away....I wouldve been in my own place again as soon as I could afford it. I love my parents and dont mind living with them....its just that I believe once a child can afford to live on their own, they should do so. Otherwise, you're just prolonging the act of growing up. Its a natural step in life.
I look at all of our friends who arent married yet -- they're all living at home with parents still....at 23. I mean, c'mon. They have full-time, good paying jobs. They could easily own apartments and live on their own. Instead they're mooching off their parents by not paying for rent or food, having their parents do their laundry.....i mean....grow up. It creates a dependancy for both the parents and the children.
Same here.
Agree with this 100% !!!
SylvieB
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
I agree it's a personal decision depending on family life, etc. BUT- with that said, I have a very firm belief that every woman should experience living alone before getting married. I just think it's invaluable life experience, that you will NOT get living at home.
ant n tilde
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
Posted by SylvieB
I agree it's a personal decision depending on family life, etc. BUT- with that said, I have a very firm belief that every woman should experience living alone before getting married. I just think it's invaluable life experience, that you will NOT get living at home.
this made me think - i dont know a single woman who moved out on her own in my family we wait until marriage but i have a few friends that moved in with boyfriends/fiances but i dont know anyone who just moved out on their own or even with a roommate. . . interesting, lol
imas98
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
bluegreen08
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
Posted by ant n tilde
Posted by SylvieB
I agree it's a personal decision depending on family life, etc. BUT- with that said, I have a very firm belief that every woman should experience living alone before getting married. I just think it's invaluable life experience, that you will NOT get living at home.
this made me think - i dont know a single woman who moved out on her own in my family we wait until marriage but i have a few friends that moved in with boyfriends/fiances but i dont know anyone who just moved out on their own or even with a roommate. . . interesting, lol
I know a lot of people who moved out but got apartments in the city, but none of my female friends moved out and got apartments on LI. One moved in with her boyfriend when her family moved to Florida and then out of necessity got her own 'apartment' basement of a random family's house when they broke up. Even my male HS friends who still live on LI live at home.
I love my freedom and my apartment, but if I was still on LI right now I'd probably be living at home too.
Brian and Marie
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Re: Appropraite age to move out of your parents' house
Posted by SylvieB
I agree it's a personal decision depending on family life, etc. BUT- with that said, I have a very firm belief that every woman should experience living alone before getting married. I just think it's invaluable life experience, that you will NOT get living at home.
This is very true! Although in my Italian upbringing MOST women stay home until marriage BUT I had the opportunity of moving out and to another state with my sister (she went away to college and I couldn't get a teaching job on LI- so it was NC for me). For two years it was JUST US and it was one of the BEST experiences of my life!! Not only did it bring my sister and I closer, it helped me grow as a person!!
