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Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

kptoys Posted: Nov 06, 2004 04:03 PM+

kptoys MEMBER SINCE: 11/02 TOTAL POSTS : 7696 WEDDING DATE: May 22, 2004

Posted: Nov 06, 2004 04:03 PM

Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

I have 3 people that came to the wedding but didnt give a gift. I want to send them a thank you but how do I word it?? A one liner? Thanks for coming to the wedding cheapskate???

J/K what should I say?

Marcie Posted: Nov 06, 2004 04:11 PM+

Marcie MEMBER SINCE: 3/04 TOTAL POSTS : 1911 WEDDING DATE: Oct 22, 2004

Posted: Nov 06, 2004 04:11 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

Heeheehee! I had someone that did the same thing and have been wondering the same thing. I was thinking of writing what you said minus the cheapsake thing - heehee!

btrflygrl Posted: Nov 06, 2004 06:11 PM+

btrflygrl MEMBER SINCE: 7/03 TOTAL POSTS : 11114 WEDDING DATE: Mar 06, 2004

Posted: Nov 06, 2004 06:11 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

we said thank you for making our day special , sharing in our special day, blah blah blah

9.17.04bride Posted: Nov 06, 2004 06:15 PM+

9.17.04bride MEMBER SINCE: 8/03 TOTAL POSTS : 536 WEDDING DATE: Sep 17, 2004

Posted: Nov 06, 2004 06:15 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

this maybe rude, but we didn't send one.

Monkeybride Posted: Nov 06, 2004 06:38 PM+

Monkeybride MEMBER SINCE: 10/03 TOTAL POSTS : 1790 WEDDING DATE: Sep 17, 2004

Posted: Nov 06, 2004 06:38 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

I think I am going to say
Thank you so much for making the trip to NY to share our wedding day with us.
It meant so much to both of us to have you there.

Short and sweet

skew Posted: Nov 07, 2004 08:25 AM+

skew MEMBER SINCE: 10/03 TOTAL POSTS : 2414 WEDDING DATE: Oct 23, 2004

Posted: Nov 07, 2004 08:25 AM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

PERFECT

B2BMay04 Posted: Nov 07, 2004 09:41 AM+

B2BMay04 MEMBER SINCE: 10/03 TOTAL POSTS : 750 WEDDING DATE: May 21, 2004

Posted: Nov 07, 2004 09:41 AM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

I had this situation as well with two couples.

The couple that came in from California I wrote a note saying thank you for making the journey to NY to celebrate our wedding day. It meant a lot to us that you were there. Blah blah blah

The other who was from New York I didn't send one to. My step cousin came with his girlfriend and didn't even give a card. Even had the awkward situation of having to ask the girlfriend to get up and out of my family photo when we specified family only.

janwinterbridejoy Posted: Nov 07, 2004 09:55 AM+

janwinterbridejoy MEMBER SINCE: 12/03 TOTAL POSTS : 6843 WEDDING DATE: Jan 09, 2004

Posted: Nov 07, 2004 09:55 AM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

i would also thank them for spending your special day with you and leave it at that

nferrandi Posted: Nov 07, 2004 12:31 PM+

nferrandi MEMBER SINCE: 12/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5367 WEDDING DATE: Oct 09, 2004

Posted: Nov 07, 2004 12:31 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

I was planning on sending a 'than you for sharing in our special day...' but my friend who got married yesterday said not to send one at all. That way in case people gave/sent a gift they will figure out you didn't rfecieve it. I haven't decided for sure how we'll handle it. Right now we only have two of those that I can think of. One is my friend and one is DH's cousin and he boyfriend.

september2004 Posted: Nov 07, 2004 01:19 PM+

september2004 MEMBER SINCE: 9/03 TOTAL POSTS : 3381 WEDDING DATE: Sep 18, 2004

Posted: Nov 07, 2004 01:19 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

Posted by nferrandi

I was planning on sending a 'than you for sharing in our special day...' but my friend who got married yesterday said not to send one at all. That way in case people gave/sent a gift they will figure out you didn't rfecieve it. I haven't decided for sure how we'll handle it. Right now we only have two of those that I can think of. One is my friend and one is DH's cousin and he boyfriend.

we have 3 people that aren't the 'non gift giving' type so we are unclear if we misread them or just lost their gift. we are going to send thank yous with no mention of gift, maybe they will put two and two together, maybe not...

we had DH's sister call us to ask us if we got her gift as the check had yet to be cashed. we said we never got one from her and assumed the large amount from DH's parent that was signed 'and family' covered her as well. turns out the check was hidden in the back flap of the card she gave and we missed it! from now on i will never condsider giving cash as it is too easy to lose and there is no way the other person will know if we received it or not without asking.

we will send thank yous just because i don't feel comfortable not doing so...

christy Posted: Nov 07, 2004 01:24 PM+

christy MEMBER SINCE: 1/02 TOTAL POSTS : 6763 WEDDING DATE: Apr 18, 2003

Posted: Nov 07, 2004 01:24 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

Ok, I guess I am the mean one here, but we had many relatives that did not even give us a card congratulating us...so I sent nothing.

kptoys Posted: Nov 07, 2004 01:52 PM+

kptoys MEMBER SINCE: 11/02 TOTAL POSTS : 7696 WEDDING DATE: May 22, 2004

Posted: Nov 07, 2004 01:52 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

Posted by september2004

we have 3 people that aren't the 'non gift giving' type so we are unclear if we misread them or just lost their gift. we are going to send thank yous with no mention of gift, maybe they will put two and two together, maybe not...

Thats my feeling!!

brideinapril Posted: Nov 07, 2004 03:21 PM+

brideinapril MEMBER SINCE: 11/03 TOTAL POSTS : 4443 WEDDING DATE: Apr 17, 2004

Posted: Nov 07, 2004 03:21 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

I wrote 'Thank you for sharing in our special day, we hope you had a woderful time'

jessnyc711 Posted: Nov 08, 2004 11:09 AM+

jessnyc711 MEMBER SINCE: 10/03 TOTAL POSTS : 1262 WEDDING DATE: Aug 29, 2004

Posted: Nov 08, 2004 11:09 AM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

I would just thank them for attending...but that would be funny if you could really write...thank you for coming cheapskate! LOL, or Thanks for nothing, ha ha...!!

palebride Posted: Nov 08, 2004 11:52 AM+

palebride MEMBER SINCE: 6/03 TOTAL POSTS : 12372 WEDDING DATE: Apr 03, 2004

Posted: Nov 08, 2004 11:52 AM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

I would say send a thank you thanking them for coming.....that's what we did

1017Bride Posted: Nov 08, 2004 11:12 PM+

1017Bride MEMBER SINCE: 8/03 TOTAL POSTS : 7572 WEDDING DATE: Oct 17, 2004

Posted: Nov 08, 2004 11:12 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

LOL on the cheapskate comment. I have 2 people who did the same thing and I am wondering what I am going to write too!

LADYLUV69 Posted: Nov 09, 2004 01:54 PM+

LADYLUV69 MEMBER SINCE: 10/03 TOTAL POSTS : 1062 WEDDING DATE: Aug 21, 2004

Posted: Nov 09, 2004 01:54 PM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

We had a couple of people come empty handed; therefore, we've decided not to send them anything at all.

tourist Posted: Nov 10, 2004 09:42 AM+

tourist MEMBER SINCE: 12/03 TOTAL POSTS : 9094 WEDDING DATE: Oct 09, 2004

Posted: Nov 10, 2004 09:42 AM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

I have just 1, a co-worker, who said her gift 'is coming'
So do I wait? When other coworkers get their thank yous, will she say 'where is mine'?

And if I send a 'thank you for coming' one will she
think it is a hint that I want ehr to give me the gift she mentioned?

FeliciaDA Posted: Nov 10, 2004 09:55 AM+

FeliciaDA MEMBER SINCE: 12/03 TOTAL POSTS : 11583 WEDDING DATE: Jul 25, 2004

Posted: Nov 10, 2004 09:55 AM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

Posted by tourist

I have just 1, a co-worker, who said her gift 'is coming'
So do I wait? When other coworkers get their thank yous, will she say 'where is mine'?

And if I send a 'thank you for coming' one will she
think it is a hint that I want ehr to give me the gift she mentioned?

Wow - I am in the exact same predicament, Tourist and am glad you brought up this question....

I have 2 people -- one is my boss&wife, the other a close friend --who have assured me that our 'gift is coming.' And I do believe they will send the gift, that is not my issue per se.

Meanwhile I've sent out all my thank yous to everyone, but held off on theirs because I also thought it would sound 'pushy' if I sent a 'thank you for coming to the wedding' card (though I seriously intend for it to be that way! I do want to just thank them for coming to the wedding!)

But now I have a feeling they will compare notes with my other friends and think I am purposely NOT sending a thank you because of the lack of a gift thus far!

Damned if I do, damned if I don't

SHould you send the 'thank you for coming ' card (photo thank you) and then another note after I receive the gift??

ETA: I also had 9 stiffers (7 are close relatives of DH's, 2 are 'friends' of mine) that I know will NOT be sending us a gift. Heck they didn't even have the decency of giving us a card! And I'm very torn on sending them a thank you at all. Yes, I know its the 'right thing' to do, but honestly it slighly bothers me that they couldn't even give us a card (not to mention we have been generous with them, and they are LOADED so that is not the issue!)

I mean even people in my office and people who didn't come sent a card!!!!! Its only a few dollars, geez!!!

OK vent over

1017Bride Posted: Nov 10, 2004 10:15 AM+

1017Bride MEMBER SINCE: 8/03 TOTAL POSTS : 7572 WEDDING DATE: Oct 17, 2004

Posted: Nov 10, 2004 10:15 AM

Re: Came to wedding but no gift... what to write in TY??

We got an update on the two people who did not give gifts.

One of them is a friend of ours. He is a nice guy but not very reliable. He says he will give us a check soon but I am not sure to trust him.

The other couple said that they will be sending a gift soon. We will see and hopefully they will before I send out the Thank yous.