Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

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Posted by failurebydsign

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Posted by carolinep24

I have only spanked my son on the tush a handful of times... but rest assured he has REMEMBERED each time I gave him a spank.

I do not think there is anything wrong with it..though I will try everything in my power to avoid that.

I would never smack him..

To be honest I was about to come online and ask if anything of the other mother's ever have moments where they fantasize about beating the living cr@p out of their kid..

because I'm having one of those moments tonight...

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but kids drive you nuts and when anything drives you crazy you want to kick scream and punch..it just so happens to be a kid in your case

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I dont think Caroline said she beats her kid, she mentioned she spanked him only a few times, just wanted to clarify Caroline is not a violent person

ETA: I might be reading your post wrong though.

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

I was spanked as a child and I never talked back because of them! But I just cant do it. When my niece gets out os hand, Ill slap her hand. But I feel really bad afterwards. I dont know what Im gonna do when I have my own.

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

Not slapping....but yes to spanking. DH and I are both products of spanking and we're fine! I actually used to get spanked one time for EVERY point I got away from 100 on every test I took. So while my classmates, were getting taken to the movies for their B's....I was a mess if I saw that I got anything lower than a 95. But that quickly made me an A student!

I think it's partly cultural though....my parents told me that back in Asia, corporal punishment is encouraged and teachers in school are allowed to spank the kids. but those are some well - disciplined kids!

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

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Posted by jenlen

Not slapping....but yes to spanking. DH and I are both products of spanking and we're fine! I actually used to get spanked one time for EVERY point I got away from 100 on every test I took. So while my classmates, were getting taken to the movies for their B's....I was a mess if I saw that I got anything lower than a 95. But that quickly made me an A student!

I think it's partly cultural though....my parents told me that back in Asia, corporal punishment is encouraged and teachers in school are allowed to spank the kids. but those are some well - disciplined kids!

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i got hit once bc i was proud of a 90! LOL i came home all excited and my grandmother was like that is NOT something to be proud of and spanked me!

guess what? i got 100 after that

i believe that spanking is a great form of discipline when used properly

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

Recently on TV there was a special and they said spanking children affects their sex lives as adults....Dont know how accurate that is...

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

honestly nothing wrong with spanking but you should always try to discuss things prior if the child can't handle having you telling them right from wrong then a spanking should take place.

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

if after warning them and giving them all the other options, yes, spanking is on the table as far as being a deterrent/tactic. As a kid, I was spanked, got the wooden spoon and even got the bar of Dial soap in the mouth a few times. None of that harmed me, and it taught me to behave and not act up or out. DH and I luckily agree on this.

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

i think a spank on the hiney is perfectly fine..

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

I feel torn, only because I see different sides.

I was spanked (bompba, if you will) a handul of times and never wanted it to happen again. My dad onced bompba'd me up the stairs when I was like 4 because I threw a tantrum and my mom said it was hysterical (picture a little kid get bumped on the tush each and every step )

My SIL gets angry very easily and really spanks my nephew when he gets 'slightly' out of hand, which I think is sometimes a bit unnecessary. My niece, OTOH, was practically scarred for DAYS when FH wanted her to go inside while he smoked a cig and lightly pushed her by the tush to go through the door...she said, in a very sad tone, 'Uncle Timmy HIT me...' Not the case at all!

So...I think ligh spanking are definitely an OK form of discipline, when used correctly and not abused in terms of forgoing other conventional methods of child rearing/discipline, but I was certainly concerned when I saw my nieces reaction (and she has probably never ONCE been truly spanked as a consequence of bad behavior).

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

A spank in the Hiney I agree with

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

Personally I don't agree with any form of hitting or spanking. I was spanked as a child when I got out of hand...and I don't know I just don't agree with it.

I think there's other tactics you could take such as having a stern talk with them or giving them a time out. I don't have children yet, so i'm not sure how effective those tactics are....but i'll be sure to try those first before I even think about spanking.

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

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Posted by AeroJenn

DH and I do not agree on this topic.

I believe in spanking. Growing up, i was spanked, slapped, and hit with wooden spoons. I turned out fine. Now, I wouldnt slap my child across the face (that was very devestating to me as a kid) and I'm not sure I'd use a wooden spoon either (although I joke about it all the time), but I believe that spanking on the bottom is a lesson learned. worked for me.

DH on the other hand never got spanked ever. And he doesnt believe in it.

If our kids take after ME...we'll be spanking them. I was a terrible child.

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We got the wooden spoon too!!! Why do I crack up when I find out others have been through the same?

Granted I don't remember ever getting hit by the wooden spoon- but my mom sure would threaten it. Later my sisters and I would just make fun of her in her high pitched nasally voice, thick Long Island accent - 'I'M GONNA GET YA WITH THE WOODEN SPOON!'

Ugh I'm so messed up on the issue. Being a teacher, I deal with disciplining children all day long- and of course its not the same as having your own but it makes me really examine how we talk to children. I sometimes feel spanking/hitting a child is just too humiliating for them and there must be a better solution...though yes, there will be times when it is necessary. I know the one time my sister spanked her daughter, I think my sister took it harder than her daughter did!!

DH is certain the kids are gonna need it...simply because he was backhanded if he did anything bad. I personally don't remember being hit but I remember being TERRIFIED of my dad. And I hate that it put a real distance between us. I hope if DH chooses to put the fear in the kid that it won't affect their relationship. Well the good thing is he's super close with his dad....

I love how he talks as if he knows how to raise kids already. He watches my sisters/husbands and their kids and says 'If my kids did that, I'd give them a.....' He always talks as if he knows exactly how he'd be. I keep telling him- you don't know how you'd really react until you're in that situation!!! He's the idiot that says 'We never drove around in car seats at that age!' 'We didn't wear helmets when we rode our bikes!' And I keep telling him, once you have a kid you will do ANYTHING to protect them. Oy, he kills me sometimes.

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

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Posted by MJDoc12

never in the face---it leaves marks!

honestly--i was spanked as a child. i survived. controversial as it sounds--i'm sure i will spank my kids when they get crazy out of hand like my mom did to me. judge if you will---but i don't think a spanking destroys a kid.

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I totally agree. I got spanked and I turned out just fine!

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

I actually DO believe a little spank on the booty can be very effective - only because my parents SO RARELY did it that I remember just about each and every spanking I got to this day.

But I think its the 'punishment of last resort' you know? Its just not effective as a tantrum stopper or mood stabilizer. BUT I would spank my kid if he was doing something dangerous or potentially dangerous (i.e. running away from me at a street crossing, harming another child, or something like that.) That's my only criteria....

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

I spank the hand, not the hinny. I even did it with my 9 year old, and it seems to be working for my almost 2 year old as well. 2 1/2 he'll know right from wrong.

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

When they are little a slap on the tush with just the hand is fine. Absolutely no face hit what-so-ever! No spoons, no paddles, no switches, etc... The reason hitting got out of hand was because people were hitting their kids in anger or even for some twisted sadistic purposes. One thing that was suggested is, if your kid does something that really really makes you angry. Send them to their room. No matter how horrible a thing they may have done, send them to their room and cool off before you decide how to handle the problem. Thats what I choose to do.

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

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Posted by twinkletoes807

I absolutely believe in spankings!! My dad has spanked me several times when I was being a brat. My mom used to hit me with a wooden spoon until she broke it on my brother! Too many kids grow up without getting any discipline and I saw the results of it on the streets when they were in trouble and in my handcuffs. Kids need the 'fear of God' put into them sometimes!

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I agree

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

I have never spanked my kids and the know when enough is enough . They do get punished not physically though. There is a very bad history of child abuse in my family...both of my parents had it god awful...my mom got a bit out of hand so I dont use any physical actions because Im afraid to for my own reasons....I dont think its wrong for other people just not for me

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

I absolutely agree with spanking. I was spanked as a kid and I think I turned out pretty damn good, plus I am a teacher and I see all the spoiled brats that need a good spanking. They think it's child abuse if you say you were spanked as a kid!

Re: do you believe in slapping or spanking a child as a form of discipline?

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Posted by MrsQ-in2007

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Posted by hunnybunnyxoxo

I believe in spanking only if they got completely out of hand, after counting to 3, and the 'look' didnt work

i dont think i would ever slap the face though!

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i agree! no slapping, but a spank is ok after all other options.. and not like BEAT them, lol.

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I also agree- I work with children ages 6-12 and when the parents come to pick them up I had seen a few things that I didn't like- I was spanked as a child but NEVER slapped. I saw one mom slap her 7 year old daughter twice because she didn't do her homework and was disrespectful of the staff.