How do you feel about .....

whooooooooooooooooooa Nelly. You do not want me in this thread.

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Posted by carolinebr

whooooooooooooooooooa Nelly. You do not want me in this thread.

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don't worry caroline---kelly had a few kids before marriage---she isn't preaching at all!


honestly -- for me-- no i didn't want kids before marriage. however, if it happened, what can ya do? my parents weren't married yet when they had my brother and i.

my mom always said that as long as you are faithful to the man you're with, keep a home together, and share your lives....you're his 'wife'. the piece of paper is nice--but the committment is the real deal

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Posted by MJDoc12

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Posted by carolinebr

whooooooooooooooooooa Nelly. You do not want me in this thread.

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don't worry caroline---kelly had a few kids before marriage---she isn't preaching at all!


honestly -- for me-- no i didn't want kids before marriage. however, if it happened, what can ya do? my parents weren't married yet when they had my brother and i.

my mom always said that as long as you are faithful to the man you're with, keep a home together, and share your lives....you're his 'wife'. the piece of paper is nice--but the committment is the real deal

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sounds like a wise woman!

I'm obviously touchy on the subject
<----- see avatar

I know there will be people who bash those of us who were pregnant before we got married. That's why I was thinking of bowing out of the topic

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Posted by olechka1911

I feel that everybody has to decide for herself. I have never judged anybody for being pregnant before marriage.

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I agree! Everyone lives there own lives and its not our place to decide whats right for them!

I am going to be honest here.

Before talking to some of the ladies on this board I have had NO positive examples of women who got pregnant before marriage.

I am not talking about celebrities, I am talking about the people I come in contact with in my real life. I have had some NOT so positive examples of it though. ((Those who know me, and feel like I am missing someone - let me know))

So, I will admit I had some preconceived notions of the whole subject. But now that I have some 'friends' who are AWESOME examples of motherhood.period. I have definitely changed my beliefs.

Yes a message board changed my mind, it CAN happen

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Posted by MJDoc12

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Posted by carolinebr

whooooooooooooooooooa Nelly. You do not want me in this thread.

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don't worry caroline---kelly had a few kids before marriage---she isn't preaching at all!


honestly -- for me-- no i didn't want kids before marriage. however, if it happened, what can ya do? my parents weren't married yet when they had my brother and i.

my mom always said that as long as you are faithful to the man you're with, keep a home together, and share your lives....you're his 'wife'. the piece of paper is nice--but the committment is the real deal

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I did have two kids before DH but I was married before ...I was a virgin when I got married the first time lmao...However Melissa you are absolutely I am by no means judging DH and I have been trying since we got engaged

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Posted by ant n tilde

I am going to be honest here.

Before talking to some of the ladies on this board I have had NO positive examples of women who got pregnant before marriage.

I am not talking about celebrities, I am talking about the people I come in contact with in my real life. I have had some NOT so positive examples of it though. ((Those who know me, and feel like I am missing someone - let me know))

So, I will admit I had some preconceived notions of the whole subject. But now that I have some 'friends' who are AWESOME examples of motherhood.period. I have definitely changed my beliefs.

Yes a message board changed my mind, it CAN happen

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miracles on boards DO happen!

well i'm sure (from things you've posted) you have certainly had a conservative & religious upbringing with your family.....so obviously kids before marriage had to be very frowned upon!

heck i have TERRIBLE examples of people around me who had children either before marriage--or just never married and had more kids with different people. examples like that---i think are the times when people bash and such. i mean DH works as a cop and the GHETTO stories he comes home with -- visiting apartments with 3,4,5, 6+ kids all born to different fathers is what brings on the judgement for me.

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Posted by MJDoc12

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Posted by ant n tilde

I am going to be honest here.

Before talking to some of the ladies on this board I have had NO positive examples of women who got pregnant before marriage.

I am not talking about celebrities, I am talking about the people I come in contact with in my real life. I have had some NOT so positive examples of it though. ((Those who know me, and feel like I am missing someone - let me know))

So, I will admit I had some preconceived notions of the whole subject. But now that I have some 'friends' who are AWESOME examples of motherhood.period. I have definitely changed my beliefs.

Yes a message board changed my mind, it CAN happen

---

miracles on boards DO happen!

well i'm sure (from things you've posted) you have certainly had a conservative & religious upbringing with your family.....so obviously kids before marriage had to be very frowned upon!

heck i have TERRIBLE examples of people around me who had children either before marriage--or just never married and had more kids with different people. examples like that---i think are the times when people bash and such. i mean DH works as a cop and the GHETTO stories he comes home with -- visiting apartments with 3,4,5, 6+ kids all born to different fathers is what brings on the judgement for me.

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Yes, these are the examples that I was more familiar with unfortunately. Or having multiple abortions, miscarriages and then STILL being shocked when they got pregnant again. Women getting pregnant on purpose to keep 'her man' garbage like that. So, I was pretty horrified at some circumstances. . .

I had no one that was 'normal' really!

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Posted by carolinebr

I'm obviously touchy on the subject
<----- see avatar

I know there will be people who bash those of us who were pregnant before we got married. That's why I was thinking of bowing out of the topic

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hah, caroline at least you married your baby daddy.

I'm on level 2 of baby before marriage... daddy go bye bye

I had DD 6 years before DH and I got married. She was a 'surprise' and I chnaged my entire life to be what I think is the defintion of a good mom (for me)
I also thought that I would have had another by myself, so she would not be an only child, but then DH came along and I figured I could wait a bit more.
I don't judge people who have kids before, during or after marriage.

I do however judge some people's reasons for having kids. IE: to 'save' a marriage, to 'keep' a man/woman, etc

This topic brings so many different feelings for me. Normally I would never post on a topic this 'controversial'. I don't really have any reaction to pregnancy without being married.

ETA - How I feel about 1 specific person really has nothing to do with what the OP meant so I deleted some of my response.

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Posted by ant n tilde

Yes, these are the examples that I was more familiar with unfortunately. Or having multiple abortions, miscarriages and then STILL being shocked when they got pregnant again.

I had no one that was 'normal' really!

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These were the kind of things I was referring to in the other post the other day...when someone blatantly knows they can get pregnant, takes no precautions and winds up pregnant and 'surprised'...but i think the way i wrote it offended some of you wonderful moms on here...and for that i am truly sorry!!!!!!

Hi guys.

I never posted our engagement pictures but as long as you guys are all cool with this, here you go! Thanks!












(um, that's not us)

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Posted by carolinebr

Hi guys.

I never posted out engagement pictures but as long as you guys are all cool with this, here you go! Thanks!












(um, that's not us)

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OMG I was like...r u serious? Talk about tacky & man is that guy ugly