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I have the fever. Badly.

Original post by MrsDrinkh20

Thread views: 4,182

Ok so seeing my sister and her baby has officially pushed me over to team 'I want a baby.' I just do. Something clicked and I just want one. Unfortunately, we are not ready financially or in a house yet so we cant have one. I feel so sad that we both work SO hard and just can't seem to make enough money to get a house. Darn school loans! Ugh. ANyone else feel that way?


ETA: DH wants one too. lol
MirabellaNYC

Re: I have the fever. Badly.

DH being a planner isn't always a bad thing-

It's great you guys are on the same page with it-devise a budget/savings plan..

We're not in a house yet-we still are sitting on 2 mortgages which thankfully we can afford-

Once both places sell we'll have the downpayment for a house.

If you guys keep talking about it he might come around

Is your condo a 2 bedroom? That's fine for a baby!

We live in a 2 bedroom apartment-sure we'll be crammed with all the baby stuff when it comes, but it's ok with us.
RitasEngaged

Re: I have the fever. Badly.


Posted by MirabellaNYC



Is your condo a 2 bedroom? That's fine for a baby!

We live in a 2 bedroom apartment-sure we'll be crammed with all the baby stuff when it comes, but it's ok with us.



ITA - this is what we have and we are ttc - it is big enough for us 2 and a baby but no more lol
fiore76

Re: I have the fever. Badly.

Definitely in the same boat as you

MrsDrinkh20

Re: I have the fever. Badly.

we only have a 1 br.
RitasEngaged

Re: I have the fever. Badly.


Posted by MrsDrinkh20

we only have a 1 br.



oh poo
pandafish519

Re: I have the fever. Badly.


Posted by MrsDrinkh20

we only have a 1 br.



trust me. you can totally make it work. totally not pressuring you to have a baby HA. just saying. the first few months maddy was in the bassinet and didn't sleep in the crib for a while.

do what's best for you. but there really is no way to be fully prepared. i ended up not breast feeding even though i wanted to, i found specific diapers i like, etc.

its always going to be a little harder than just taking care of you and DH and those amazing pups, but SO beyond worth it.
alli3131

Re: I have the fever. Badly.


Posted by MrsDrinkh20

we only have a 1 br.



I have friends who are in a one bed with 2 kids so it can be done.....its just a matter of if both of you want it to work. If you both want it bad enough you will find a way to make it work in your current situation.
MrsDrinkh20

Re: I have the fever. Badly.


Posted by alli3131


Posted by MrsDrinkh20

we only have a 1 br.



I have friends who are in a one bed with 2 kids so it can be done.....its just a matter of if both of you want it to work. If you both want it bad enough you will find a way to make it work in your current situation.



Then by going by this, I guess he doesnt have it as bad as I do.
LadyDuda81509

Re: I have the fever. Badly.


Posted by pandafish519


my dad said this to me when i said how badly we want a house and to make more money:

'You can always make more money, somehow, someway. You can never replace what that little girl is.'




I love this!!! even tho we have a house already we are still pretty broke...ive been telling DH for a while now that for me a baby is worth more to me than all the money in the world and we will some how manage so lets have one now!!!!! lol
alli3131

Re: I have the fever. Badly.


Posted by MrsDrinkh20


Posted by alli3131


Posted by MrsDrinkh20

we only have a 1 br.



I have friends who are in a one bed with 2 kids so it can be done.....its just a matter of if both of you want it to work. If you both want it bad enough you will find a way to make it work in your current situation.



Then by going by this, I guess he doesnt have it as bad as I do.



and maybe he doesnt. DH and I had a talk way before we were even engaged about when each of us wanted kids....he wanted to wait but because I am much older than him I didnt feel like I could wait til when he wanted. So we met in the middle.

It doent have to be on his or your schedule......come to a middle ground and he has to realize...life will never be a perfect time....just try to put yourselves in the best position possible.
pandafish519

Re: I have the fever. Badly.


Posted by LadyDuda81509


Posted by pandafish519


my dad said this to me when i said how badly we want a house and to make more money:

'You can always make more money, somehow, someway. You can never replace what that little girl is.'




I love this!!! even tho we have a house already we are still pretty broke...ive been telling DH for a while now that for me a baby is worth more to me than all the money in the world and we will some how manage so lets have one now!!!!! lol




its very true!!!!!! Dh and i don't have a house, and we both don't really make great money, but maddy is worth every bit of struggle.

ETA: MAKE A BABY!
MrsC2010

Re: I have the fever. Badly.

dooooooooo it!

lol. no but seriously. I dont think there is ever 'the perfect time'. If you and DH are emotionally ready I think you should at least start trying. Everything else will fall into place.
meara

Re: I have the fever. Badly.


Posted by RitasEngaged


Posted by MrsDrinkh20

we only have a 1 br.



oh poo



well you know (I think) that DH and I are preggers and we had a lot of those same concerns. .we only have a 1 BR and rent it, at the time we started trying DH was actually out of work but we thought we have enough money to do things well (medical care, good food, necessities,) if not as well as we would like and just decided to go for it.. .also thinking that it might be a LONG time until we were really in a good place financially. .

I had talked to my mom about it and she said. . don't let the $ part stop you bc it might never be the right time and you have one life. . of course we are a little older than you guys so if it makes sense for you to wait a few years i DO totally get that too. . I just would try not to get too caught up in waiting for everything to b $$$$ perfect. .

or that's what I keep telling myself!
miamimerger

Re: I have the fever. Badly.

I go away for a few days and I miss this post?! I had to comment .

First of all, I am not trying to encourage or discourage you from having a ; I just want to say that I've been in your shoes not too long ago! DH and I have WELL OVER 100k in student loans (you and Brad have us beat though ), and the thought of adding additional expenses was/still is terrifying. We look at our degrees as an investment though, and realize that if we are going to wait to have kids until we pay them off, we'll have to wait 20 years. Out of all things, don't let your student loans get in your way--they will be there for a long, long time!
christine2010

Re: I have the fever. Badly.

On occassion, I will say to DH lets have baby. But then I remember how small our apartment is & how many things we want to do prior to having a baby.
It makes me a little sad because so many people I know are preggos & I would of liked to have kids around the same ago so they had automatic friends.

I know its best for us to wait a while. I have some health issues going on & my doctor already told me that once I do get pregnant its going to be a very hard 9 months. DH & I are not prepared for that yet.
FuTuRe MrS MaZz

Re: I have the fever. Badly.

Ive felt that way, but really, if you're like me, your mind will change again in another month... DH & I have now appreciated the time we have together... now.. to just be a married couple... doing spontaneous things whenever we want... without having to worry about another person...

There will never feel like theres a right time... but at least you can get more of your ducks in a row... take a couple yrs to get a bigger place, pay down some debt, put more into savings, travel etc...Fertility issues should be the last thing we're worried about in our 20's KWIM?... Look at us, we have 2 extra bedrooms and are happy to leave them empty right now... we want to 'live' first before dropping everything and having a child... thats so much harder to do when you have a little one... As a FT nanny right now, I spend pretty much all daylight hrs with a child (i consider myself her 2nd mother), and see just how demanding it can be... there are no breaks (now that nap time has ceased to exist)... its exhausting to be honest... im done and in bed before DH is

Learn to treasure the time you and DH have right now to yourselves... enjoy that bc we are only 'young' once

Hope this helps you to see a diff perspective on it...
AugustBridein09

Re: I have the fever. Badly.


Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

DH & I have now appreciated the time we have together... now.. to just be a married couple... doing spontaneous things whenever we want... without having to worry about another person...

There will never feel like theres a right time... but at least you can get more of your ducks in a row... take a couple yrs to get a bigger place, pay down some debt, put more into savings, travel etc...Fertility issues should be the last thing we're worried about in our 20's KWIM?... Look at us, we have 2 extra bedrooms and are happy to leave them empty right now... we want to 'live' first before dropping everything and having a child... thats so much harder to do when you have a little one... As a FT nanny right now, I spend pretty much all daylight hrs with a child (i consider myself her 2nd mother), and see just how demanding it can be... there are no breaks (now that nap time has ceased to exist)... its exhausting to be honest... im done and in bed before DH is

Learn to treasure the time you and DH have right now to yourselves... enjoy that bc we are only 'young' once

Hope this helps you to see a diff perspective on it...






ALL OF THIS.


ITA!
JenBill61210

Re: I have the fever. Badly.

I think if you two agree that you both want kids then go for it, you have to both be in the same place though. DH and I will probably wait a year or so, just to enjoy being married and each others company before having kids. we also just bought a house so we want to settle into that and make sure we can handle it financially (although i know they say you are never financially ready to have a kid!)

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