I will be married in 5 months, however Fh and I have been together for 10 years. I feel like we have been through so much and have grown tremendously throughout our relationship.
In all honesty I feel as though we are ahead of the game. However those already married tell me to be prepared because it is going to really be hard the first year of marriage.
Can you please share your thoughts.
NIHA
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
Hmmm... that's a good question. I honestly never thought about it before. I really don't know, but I'm sure I'll find something!!
NovemberSue
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
We lived together before we were married. I have heard people say that the first year is the most difficult. Honestly we don't know what they are talking about.Nothing has changed with us since the wedding. I am guessing that perhaps the people that have a hard time are people who never lived with each other prior and then had to adjust to living together.
Sonicstef
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
Have been living together for 10 years? If so, the first year of marriage really should be no different than before. I cant say with certainty as I have only been married 6 months, but we lived together for years before and not a thing has changed.
I think when people say the first year is hard, they mean the first year of living together. No matter how close you are - adjusting to living everyday together is something that requires adjustment on both sides and is very hard for some. Our first year was aweful and many of my friends had similiar experiences.
What I dont like about marriage? Paying more taxes!!!!
shamma
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
This I will have to think about and get back to you on this one.
I cannot say there is anything I do not like yet, oh people expects us to go to ever event together. It looks bad if he goes by himself and his wife stays home. Hello, maybe his wife is sick or do not want to attend. We are not joined at the hips.
That's all I can think of now. Marriage is good and even tho there are ups and downs I like the feeling of having someone in my corner.
NovemberSue
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
I agree with Stef. We had to pay more taxes.
nrvbrd
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
We do not officially live together. We do spend a lot of time together undr one roof.
LisaT
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
we're just finishing up our first year, and if that was hard, we'll have smooth sailing ahead. Really, this year has been like a dream - its wonderful. And wasn't hard at all. Maybe we're lucky.
There's nothing I don't like (except managing the two families) but what takes some getting used to is the idea that your life is not just your own. There's always someone else to consider - even more so once you're married.
We were together 5 years before we got married, and lived together for 1 - so there really were no surprises. Except how great it is.
LisaT
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
thanks for the reminder Stef - I HATE the taxes we had to PAY this year!!
LisaT
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
we spent almost every night together before we moved in, but there were still some adjusting to living together. Where do you both live now? alone? with roommates? with parents?
I think depending on where you're coming from could determine how difficult the adjustment will be. If you're coming from your parents, I'd think it'd be tougher.
We both lived with roommates, and there were minor things to adjust to, and times I'd find myself getting annoyed. But I loved setting up our apartment with him. And learned to let the little things go.
nrvbrd
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
He lives in the downstairs in the basemant apt in parents home and I share an apt with my aunt.
Suzanne
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
That i had to stop dating other men!
JUST KIDDING!! there really is NOTHING i dont like about being married to frank.. we have been friends since we were kids and have been living together for 6 years and married for 1 year.. Hes my BEST BEST BEST friend in the whole world and for me after 7 years its like a slumber party every night.. we have so much fun together!! im glad we are married!!!
Teri
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
I don't have any complaints! We lived together before the wedding, so not much changed.
shamma
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
I do not like that I have to make nice to his meanie sisters, just b/c I am now the wife
Niecey
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
Alot of people say that but I haven't experienced much of a change either. Although Dh and I have been living on our own for a long time, dated for over 6 years and also lived together for about a year before the wedding. So no change here.
From friends experiences (and not all), it seems the ones that have the hardest time were those that lived at home until they got married and never lived on their own before and I think it that adjust ing to many things all at once that is difficult.
I can't think of anything I don't like about being married cause I don't feel like much has changed. I think the most difficult thing is dealing with the people's pressure to have kids, splitting holidays (but we had that before) and dealing with having another family. Most of which haven't too bad for us.
Stef - I agree. The worst thing had to be the taxes we had a HUGE difference from filing single to married (thousands!)....
LisaT
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Re: QOTD 4/17/03- WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE ABOUT MARRIAGE?
so far, everyone who replied already lived together before the wedding. Maybe you'll get a different perspective from those that didn't.
