11 animal movies children shouldn't see (according to someone.. on aol)
11. Bambi
Bambi's mother is shot to death, leaving him stuck with his cold, absentee dad. You know who else that happened to? FIFTY CENT.
10. Dances with Wolves
Beat Kevin Costner all you want, white devils. Did you have to take Two Socks from us? He just wanted to dance
9. King Kong
Oh, Kong. We haven't cried this hard over something computer generated since our last 'Second Life' relationship went down in flames
8. 'The Land Before Time' (I LOVE this movie!)
When we think of the worst possible ways a kid can lose a parent, smacked down by a T-Rex is probably in the top five.
7. The Lion King
OH GOD the crumpled whiskers. We don't want to talk about it
6. Orca the Killer Whale
God, all Orca wanted was revenge. And maybe some herring. Why'd he have to take his own adorable life?
5. White Squall
We don't care if you're cute, Jeremy Sisto. What kind of a-hole harpoons a dolphin?
4. Turner and Hooch
Our mom swore up and down that the dog wouldn't die because it's a 'family movie.' We have yet to forgive her.
3. I am Legend
A modern example of the 'All Dogs Go to Heaven'
axiom. We were depressed for days.
2. Project x
He and Matthew Broderick held hands. He had a face like a wise child. ***, movie?
1. The Neverending Story
What happened when they were writing this script!?! 'Say, let's put in a pony, for the kids, and then drown it in a SWAMP OF SADNESS. Sound good? Great.'
Bambi's mother is shot to death, leaving him stuck with his cold, absentee dad. You know who else that happened to? FIFTY CENT.
10. Dances with Wolves
Beat Kevin Costner all you want, white devils. Did you have to take Two Socks from us? He just wanted to dance
9. King Kong
Oh, Kong. We haven't cried this hard over something computer generated since our last 'Second Life' relationship went down in flames
8. 'The Land Before Time' (I LOVE this movie!)
When we think of the worst possible ways a kid can lose a parent, smacked down by a T-Rex is probably in the top five.
7. The Lion King
OH GOD the crumpled whiskers. We don't want to talk about it
6. Orca the Killer Whale
God, all Orca wanted was revenge. And maybe some herring. Why'd he have to take his own adorable life?
5. White Squall
We don't care if you're cute, Jeremy Sisto. What kind of a-hole harpoons a dolphin?
4. Turner and Hooch
Our mom swore up and down that the dog wouldn't die because it's a 'family movie.' We have yet to forgive her.
3. I am Legend
A modern example of the 'All Dogs Go to Heaven'
axiom. We were depressed for days.
2. Project x
He and Matthew Broderick held hands. He had a face like a wise child. ***, movie?
1. The Neverending Story
What happened when they were writing this script!?! 'Say, let's put in a pony, for the kids, and then drown it in a SWAMP OF SADNESS. Sound good? Great.'
