After the I Do's

luvabul Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:39 PM

Re: After the I Do's

waiting 2 years...i think i wana enjoy married life a little, we dont live together so i think i want to adjust in to that transition.....

PoeticJustice Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:47 PM

Re: After the I Do's

I lost my first baby this past May so I will be trying again ASAP no waiting

july06bride Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:55 PM

Re: After the I Do's

we are married already-3 months and we will be waiting at least 2 years for a baby....I am turning 26 this year, DH is turning 28-we are no rush...we want to enjoy married life still and be selfish...we are not ready...if it happens it happens and it would be a wonderful blessing...but we have many travels to enjoy and would just rather wait awhile

FallBride05 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:55 PM

Re: After the I Do's

I'm 35, DH is 41, we're married not quite a year yet and we just started to TTC. We said we'd wait a year, and here we are....and let me tell you....THAT YEAR FLEW BY!

Trishthedish Posted: Oct 08, 2006 12:12 AM

Re: After the I Do's

Considering I will be 33 1/2 by the time I am married, i want to give it about 6 months before we try to conceive.

I want 2 children and I don't want to do it back to back. LOl

BunnyBride Posted: Oct 08, 2006 12:21 AM

Re: After the I Do's

Posted by eden

I asked my DH about this, he's 35 and I'm a few years younger but still no spring chicken. He is not ready to have one yet, at 35! He'll be 36 in a few months.

Anyone see something wrong with that? :(

Nope! My FH is 43 and he is still not ready!

I'm 28 and I'd like to wait a few years at least..we have time and men can have kids when there 80 so no rush!!

tdebe Posted: Oct 08, 2006 08:08 AM

Re: After the I Do's

I'd like to wait at least 5-6 years before children. I'll be 23 when I'm married and will probably start trying for kids when I'm around 28. I wanted to wait later but my mom keeps saying that there are so many risks when you start having kids late in life but movie star moms are having their first kids at like 40! Is it less of a risk now than it was before or are these people just getting lucky?

rachel212 Posted: Oct 08, 2006 08:23 AM

Re: After the I Do's

Posted by Mrs.Ptobe

So explain to me this... how does one come up with $25 - $50k for a wedding then have a child almost immediately... I'm not being sour grapes here... I really want to know so I can figure out what I am doing wrong b/c I think we are going to be way too broke to start a family immediately - AND I will be about 35 myself... so my clock is running low on batteries too... but really - kids are not a cheap thing... although I do have to admit - I would not return to work full time - seriously - does that make the big difference? If you are going back to work is that the reason it is more manageable... and those that will stay home or work p/t will have to wait a little bit... again, please no one get upset - I really need to calm FH down b/c the bills for the wedding look ridiculous. We wanted a HM baby too, but I think on the HM I'll be drinking away my bill stress... and I'm not planning a very expensive wedding...

Please let me know how people are managing this... I am sincerely curious... cost of living on LI is so expensive...

I'm actually very curious about this too. I plan on going back to work, and still don't see that being possible right away, with all the bills from the wedding (and I'm having a small wedding!) Even if you go to work, you have to pay about $1000/month for daycare. WE just bought a house and it's hard right now. I can't imagine throwing a baby in the mix just yet.

Mrs.Ptobe Posted: Oct 09, 2006 09:31 PM

Re: After the I Do's

Wow if 28 is late in life - I'm in a ton of trouble - I'm just kidding... don't feel badly young one... To be 23 again (I'd take 25 or 27 too, even 29 looks good)...

You know what - my MOH's sister was a RIPE -OLD 37 for her first baby and even RIPER and OLDER 41 for her second... she has the 2 cutest little girls - the younger one that she had as a senior citizen at 41 - is breathtakingly gorgeous. Are there risks - sure... even at 19 there are risks... there are always risks... that is what life and child bearing is about... life is a miracle... I had a co-worker have her first at 37, my MOH had her first at 34 and is now PG with her second at 35. My boss has a friend that had twin girls at 40.

My theory in my old age of 33 -- if you want to have kids - relax! Enjoy eachother and it will come... I still say babies should come when you are emotionally and financially ready. Anyone who thinks that having kids is vaca time and always happy should spend sometime with a mom. A lot of people are going to suggest children to us b/c we are getting married or are newlyweds and it seems to be the natural course of events, but they aren't babysitting or paying the bills is how I look at it.

I have a 29 y.o. coworker who plans with a calendar at work when she will 'get jiggy with it'. I actually feel bad for her. She is putting so much pressure on herself and her marriage. Not to say that those with known challenges shouldn't track their ovulation schedules, but if there are no known problems... just have fun and make love! Babies will come... I see it all the time... when you least expect it. 28 is not late in life, if that's the case, I would be on social security (just having fun with the comment since a lot of us are a bit beyond 28 and just planning our weddings).

MichLiz213 Posted: Oct 09, 2006 09:37 PM

Re: After the I Do's

I would start trying NOW if I could! But my brother and his FW are due in April, so I'll get all of that 'I want a baby' energy out on my niece or nephew and have one in about a year or so from the wedding.

SchmearandGoose Posted: Oct 09, 2006 09:46 PM

Re: After the I Do's

I couldn't even imagine having a baby right now, there are so many things I ( and we) want to do in life before we settle down! Maybe 6 years from now....I'm not in any rush!

AlBaBride Posted: Oct 09, 2006 10:00 PM

Re: After the I Do's

I'm not really in a rush...I definitely want to take a few years to enjoy married life w/ FH b4 we start trying for kids...I think I'm still a little too selfish to have a baby...There are still a lot of things that I want out of life that would be a little more complicated to achieve if I had a child

BKtoLI Posted: Oct 09, 2006 10:00 PM

Re: After the I Do's

We're waiting until next August to start trying, so we'll be married a year and 4 months at that point.

While we're not spring chickens (I'll be 33 and he'll be 34 by then) I also want to be in a better financial position than we are now.

Wintersbride Posted: Oct 09, 2006 10:02 PM

Re: After the I Do's

I'm 28 and DH is 33. I am planning on waiting until we are financially stable. Even if it means having a child later in life, I would rather do that then have one when we aren't ready.

lipglossjunky73 Posted: Oct 09, 2006 11:36 PM

Re: After the I Do's

Posted by SN2BMRSBURTE

How many ladies are planning on trying for a bun in the oven right after the wedding?

We are either trying right after, or waiting one year tops

We were planning on waiting a year.... Guess what happened?

Snowflake08 Posted: Oct 09, 2006 11:44 PM

Re: After the I Do's

You can't plan, you can only try
My grandmother says in Russian 'People plan and g-d laughs'
We are going to try, but you never know.....

Snowflake08 Posted: Oct 09, 2006 11:46 PM

Re: After the I Do's

I am 32, FH is 35 - We would like to try right away, but like i said, nothing is a 'given'

eden Posted: Oct 09, 2006 11:48 PM

Re: After the I Do's

There are definitely risks when you hit 27 the risk gets progressively worse...

There was a major article in Time magazine about it a few years ago. Many women don't know that chances of pregnancy dips from 27 on...

Time magazine article: Making Time for Baby

With that said, the rush to have kids due to risk factors should not be the motivating force behind having babies. Having a child is a huge endeavor that will last until they leave for college, assuming they leave! Otherwise you're stuck with them until they decide to move out after college.

Forget the financial burden! It costs 1000k a month at least for childcare unless you have a great mom or relative who's willing to help out!

Movie stars have them later in life 'cus many of them can afford fertility treatments and doctors who will give them the extra care required. And they also have nannies and money to spare if complications arise....

OrangeGrl Posted: Oct 10, 2006 10:03 AM

Re: After the I Do's

By the time we get married I will be 25 and FH will be 29 so we want to wait maybe 2-3 years because we want to finish school. I am getting my BA and he is going to go for his Masters in Jan. We don't want to have to juggle school and a baby