Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

vhollo01 Posted: Jul 12, 2004 09:13 PM

Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

During the first few months of dating I told him I couldn't change to his name. After he started speaking (yes, speaking) to me again, we just pretended like I never said it. I have a feeling it will rear its ugly head soon.... What are you ladies doing

And if your wondering - I can't use the hyphen... it would be a sentence!

Danielle&Scott Posted: Jul 12, 2004 09:16 PM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

Scott and I have been talking. He knows I am keeping my name for teaching. I think I am going to use both where my madien name would almost become my middle name. For example;

instead of MAry Jones
Mary Jones Smith

Murray Posted: Jul 12, 2004 09:18 PM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

Posted by vhollo01

And if your wondering - I can't use the hyphen... it would be a sentence!

I am taking his last name, but I think I am going to make my maiden name my middle name, otherwise my full name will be a question.....

Butterflybride Posted: Jul 12, 2004 09:19 PM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

I'm changing mine, but you could possibly do the 'Jessica Simpson style' and legally change his name to your middle name, if that works better than hypenating.

lanikai Posted: Jul 12, 2004 09:20 PM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

I don't want to change my name at all, but what I want to know is legally is easier to just keep it the same or to change it?

vhollo01 Posted: Jul 12, 2004 09:22 PM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

Posted by lanikai

I don't want to change my name at all, but what I want to know is legally is easier to just keep it the same or to change it?

How would it be easier to change it?

laudipop Posted: Jul 12, 2004 09:54 PM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

I'm not changing it. That would be weird to me, and I ain't doing it.

JuneBride2005 Posted: Jul 12, 2004 10:02 PM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

I don't want to give mine up...I am keeping it in there somewhere...but I will use his name too

molly25 Posted: Jul 13, 2004 01:03 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

I don't want to change my name either. FH wasn't too happy about it and said 'that's so untraditional' and that his family wouldn't understand and be insulted. So I gave in. It's just feels so weird to be called by a different name after having my name my whole life.

heidla Posted: Jul 13, 2004 01:10 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

And if your wondering - I can't use the hyphen... it would be a sentence!

I have a long last name and I hyphenated. When I told the woman at the marriage license place that I was doing that she laughed at me. She wasn't laughing anymore after she had to type the whole thing out.

BlondeJD Posted: Jul 13, 2004 01:13 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

Well, I'm the last of the line, so partially for that reason I don't want to change. But also, I made a lot of contacts in college and law school who might recognize J.C. but not J.H. I think I'm going to hyphenate for work (J.C-H) and just be J.H. socially.

What's the deal in NY? I've heard that you can't have your last name as your middle name--you can only hyphenate or take his name. Is this true?

heidla Posted: Jul 13, 2004 01:15 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

What's the deal in NY? I've heard that you can't have your last name as your middle name--you can only hyphenate or take his name. Is this true?

No you can use your maiden name as your middle, but you have to fill out a form and legally change it.

BlondeJD Posted: Jul 13, 2004 01:16 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

Thanks! Good to know. I think I'd prefer that to the hyphen actually

laudipop Posted: Jul 13, 2004 01:29 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

Wait a minute. I just re-read the original post again. He stopped speaking to you just for wanting to keep your name? That seems kind of extreme. You should ask him how he'd feel if you wanted him to change his name! There's no difference.

Maybe he's had time to think about it more since then and it won't be as big a deal as you're thinking.

eroxgirl Posted: Jul 13, 2004 07:31 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

After spending 3-1/2 hours at DMV yesterday, being forced to take a new picture when my old picture was perfectly acceptable (read: bad hair day) and coming outside and finding a ticket on my car, I say keep your name or make him go through the hassle!! It's SUCH a headache!

I have a girlfriend who was married, changed her name, divorced, changed it back. When she got engaged to her now DH, she told him she wasn't changing her name. When they went to the marriage license office, he fully expected her to change her name and they fought about it right then in there because he thought she was kidding. She wasn't kidding.

August2004 Posted: Jul 13, 2004 07:37 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

I am changing my last name, not because I want to, but my last name and first name combo are so common that I frequently get told my account is cancelled or something along those lines. This happened to me again last week at the tanning salon where I have to spend 20 minutes trying to prove that I do pay my bill because some other slacker with the same name as me doesn't pay theirs.

Seriously, my dentist called me about two years ago all snotty saying how I was supposed to have come in for a root canal that day and I never showed(mind you I have never had a cavity in my life). I spent ten minutes on the phone trying to convince them that they had the wrong girl.

I am gladly changing my last name for this reason. He has a very uncommon last name.

MegLehner Posted: Jul 13, 2004 07:48 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

Im planning on keeping my last name. My mother's maiden name is already my middle name and if I hypen or change my maiden name to midle then I will have 3 last names. I like Fh's last name, but in law school and in the professional community everybody knows me already by my maiden name and I dont want to cause confusion.

Summerbride04 Posted: Jul 13, 2004 07:54 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

I'm changing mine after many 'discussions' but decided to keep my maiden name for work.

VickiC Posted: Jul 13, 2004 08:14 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

Posted by heidla

What's the deal in NY? I've heard that you can't have your last name as your middle name--you can only hyphenate or take his name. Is this true?

No you can use your maiden name as your middle, but you have to fill out a form and legally change it.

I didn't have to change it legally, as in go to court, at all. I just changed it the SS office by saying I want to put my maiden name as my middle name and add his to the end. They were totally fine with that.

brooklynbridezilla Posted: Jul 13, 2004 08:17 AM

Re: Am I alone here - I don't want to change my name!

I will hyphenate, but not immediately. My passport is in my maiden name, and i want to keep it that way until we go on our honeymoon (which is about 8 months after the wedding). I just don't want the hassle.