Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

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Posted by melissa&carmine

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Posted by NY031978

oh man 35 kids?! ok well as i said im having a few kids..but 35??? whoa!!! thats just way to many.

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I'm one of the 'no kids' brides and this is the reason. I have 35 kids (under 5) between my family and FH's family. If we say yes to some and not others we will start wars so we just decided none can come so no one is hurt or getting special treatment. I'm not too upset about it because the kids aren't close relatives - we don't have nieces or nephews - these are all distant cousins and friends with children.

Don't hate us no kids brides. I think that many of us would love to have children. If you get an invitation and your children aren't being invited, don't hate the bride, chances are: (1) they couldn't afford to invite all the children or (2) there were way too may children that to invite them all would be too much.

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no hatters here! i promise

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

I definately want the kids in both of our families to be there. I love them all! In most cases for our wedding, we invited the kids & the parents responded that they'd be coming by themselves so they can have a fun night out dancing & mingling without worrying about their kids.

But I think it should be whatever the bride & groom want

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

Too many kids are just too distracting, then I feel like I'm in romper room babysitting rather than at a wedding. IMHO.

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

The Only kids tha are invites are family & friends and anyone in the bridal party...

At 60.00-100.00 a head I don't think children should be invited unless they are party of family or the bridal party.

I am paying 60.00 for a 3 & 4 year old now for that age how much can they possibly eat?

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

I'd rather have people that we care for there..... with their kids, then not have them come at all. It isn't about who is going to shine, or how annoying they can be. Dan and I will hopefully have kids of our own some day, and to exclude them just seems wrong.

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

Its OK to have kids at the reception, just keep in mind the ages!!!

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

hey - to each is own. It is TOTALLY a personal preference....do not let ANYONE tell you you're crazy....IT IS YOUR DAY!!!! and no one elses for that matter! If you want kids there, then have them there! who is anyone to tell you otherwise?!

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

I am another 'no kids' bride. I have been to many a wedding where children are running amok and wreaking havoc in their wake, and generally being destructive. I can only recall one wedding with children in attendance where this did not happen.

That said, my nephew is 26, and my niece will celebrate her first b-day on June 21. My nephew is obviously not a kid, and is invited, but my niece will only be included if she is walking, and then will only be included in the ceremony - not the reception that ends at midnight an hour away from home. I have ONE friend with a child, who is my FG - age 9. I have one cousin that I am kind of close with that has a child age 13. I have 4 cousins that I am not close with at all that all have two children each under the age of 5.

FH on the other hand has two nephews 14, and 15, his cousin has two kids 10, and 12, some random friend has two kids in the same general age range, his sister is dating some guy with two kids age 4 and 6, one of his best men has a 15 yr old step-daughter, one of his GM has a 16 yr old step-daughter (that I personally can't stand, that kid is the most obnoxious brat I have ever met, and I do NOT want her at my wedding because she will annoy the heck out of her mother and step-father ALL night long).

If you add that all up it comes to 21 kids. At $60 a plate that is $1260, at $100 a plate that is $2100. Any way you figure it, that is a lot of money to be spending on children that won't appreciate it. the only kids out of that entire bunch that I want at the wedding are my FG, and his two nephews. Unfortunately, FH disagrees with me completely and we have had countless fights over this. To gain some measure of control I am not inviting my cousins with kids under the age of 5, or my one year old niece. That still leaves me with 9 kids I don't want - one of which I can't stand, and will create MAJOR hassles when it comes to the seating arrangements because I will not sit that child with her parents at the bridal party table. FH agreed to exclude his sister's boyfriend's kids, which leaves me with 7 I don't want - but still a total of 10 people under the age of 18.

These aren't kids he sees every week, or even every month. Of all these extra kids he insists get invited he has only seen two of them since we started dating. So why is it so imperative that they be invited????????????

Sorry to vent on your thread.

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

kids rock!! both fh and I are elem school teachers so we love children and couldnt imagine our day without them@!!

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

I am not only having my friends and family bring their kids but all of mine(16yrs. to 2yrs.) are in the wedding party. Im also trying to get a childrens choir to sing and in St. Killians they do an amazing Childrens Mass that I wanted to incorporate into the wedding mass were the preist brings all the children to the steps of the altar and reads them a book pertaining to the mass and has them read along. Unfortunelty I cant get married at St. Killians as planned but Im still planning on having a childrens choir sing. So I understand and have enjoyed weddings were I didnt have to bring my kids but I also couldnt imagine them not being there.

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

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Posted by October Bliss

I am another 'no kids' bride. I have been to many a wedding where children are running amok and wreaking havoc in their wake, and generally being destructive. I can only recall one wedding with children in attendance where this did not happen.

That said, my nephew is 26, and my niece will celebrate her first b-day on June 21. My nephew is obviously not a kid, and is invited, but my niece will only be included if she is walking, and then will only be included in the ceremony - not the reception that ends at midnight an hour away from home. I have ONE friend with a child, who is my FG - age 9. I have one cousin that I am kind of close with that has a child age 13. I have 4 cousins that I am not close with at all that all have two children each under the age of 5.

FH on the other hand has two nephews 14, and 15, his cousin has two kids 10, and 12, some random friend has two kids in the same general age range, his sister is dating some guy with two kids age 4 and 6, one of his best men has a 15 yr old step-daughter, one of his GM has a 16 yr old step-daughter (that I personally can't stand, that kid is the most obnoxious brat I have ever met, and I do NOT want her at my wedding because she will annoy the heck out of her mother and step-father ALL night long).

If you add that all up it comes to 21 kids. At $60 a plate that is $1260, at $100 a plate that is $2100. Any way you figure it, that is a lot of money to be spending on children that won't appreciate it. the only kids out of that entire bunch that I want at the wedding are my FG, and his two nephews. Unfortunately, FH disagrees with me completely and we have had countless fights over this. To gain some measure of control I am not inviting my cousins with kids under the age of 5, or my one year old niece. That still leaves me with 9 kids I don't want - one of which I can't stand, and will create MAJOR hassles when it comes to the seating arrangements because I will not sit that child with her parents at the bridal party table. FH agreed to exclude his sister's boyfriend's kids, which leaves me with 7 I don't want - but still a total of 10 people under the age of 18.

These aren't kids he sees every week, or even every month. Of all these extra kids he insists get invited he has only seen two of them since we started dating. So why is it so imperative that they be invited????????????

Sorry to vent on your thread.

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thats okay you're allowed to vent! Vent away!

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

I think it is different when you have kids in your immediate family that you are close with. We don't have any kids in our close family, so it would all be friends and distant relatives. I think that is just more trouble than anything else.
At my cousin's wedding her FI's nephews and nieces were there and were so entertaining...they danced the night away!

Re: Am I the ONLY one who WANTS kids at their reception?

I personally think whatever floats your boat, me ?, no kids.