ok since we are on the topic of 'what if' with the tattoo thread ... would you ever consider divorce if it came to that.
my FH is from a very religious 100% italian family and they in no means consider divorce. His aunt and uncle seperated - no one spoke about it. FH feels that marriage is forever NO MATTER WHAT.
my feeling is, if things really got bad - divorce would be my absolute last resort. I dont condone it, but I wouldnt be opposed if things got to the point that I felt I was in danger, cheating other issues etc.
LIKE I SAID - some could find this controversial. Just looking for other's opinions!!!
poll for honesty!
AS
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Posted by ChristineAaron08
If it was for cheating or abouse, then absolutely- those are deal breakers
DEF!!!! Nothing to work out if they cheated or abused
AS
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Celebrities divorce like its the 'in thing' to do they are allllll soooo effin stupid
Butterfly123
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It would be an absolute last resort. It would also depend on the circumstances. If I found out he was cheating regularly, then yes he would be out the door regardless if we had children. But if we were having problems, I would try everything under the sun to work things out before going to drastic measures.
Butterfly123
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Posted by Belongs2DanBuckley
I told Dan that divorce was not an option...they would just never find his body
Butterfly123
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Posted by ant n tilde
Posted by Espo22
Posted by ant n tilde
divorce is not an option period end of story. you can all roll your eyes now but it just isnt
and no one in either of our families has ever gotten a divorce
WOW nobody in either of your families ever got a divorce, that is pretty good
and thats perfectly fine if you feel that way about divorce, you dont need to justify that and who cares if ppl roll their eyes
thanks! i know people dont believe me really when they hear it but we are going to be taking a vow before God and I think that is more important than living a fairy tale life sometimes ((although ideally I hope we get to experience BOTH))
I would never roll my eyes at that. You regularly post about religion and your faith and honestly, I respect that girl. I love the fact that you and your family are so religious and that no one has ever had a divorce. My family is full of divorce. And its horrible. Thats why I intend on this marriage working. Although Im not the most religious, I do look at marriage as VERY SACRED and would never wanna throw it away easily. I do know of some marriages ending because of adultery and physical abuse and emotional abuse and to me those are pretty much the only reasons to justify a divorce
ant n tilde
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Posted by Songstress
I would never roll my eyes at that. You regularly post about religion and your faith and honestly, I respect that girl. I love the fact that you and your family are so religious and that no one has ever had a divorce. My family is full of divorce. And its horrible. Thats why I intend on this marriage working. Although Im not the most religious, I do look at marriage as VERY SACRED and would never wanna throw it away easily. I do know of some marriages ending because of adultery and physical abuse and emotional abuse and to me those are pretty much the only reasons to justify a divorce
the church recognizes divorce for those reasons. . .actually the (catholic) church isnt as against divorce ( JUSTIFIED divorce) as you may think, they are more against remarriage AFTER divorce. . . but anyway
and i truly believe that people who are the product of a family that has many divorces in it can REALLY turn around and decide that they will not go through that. I compare it to seeing a family member suffer bc of smoking and then deciding to never pick up a cigarette. After seeing how damaging a divorce can be, that will push you THAT MUCH harder to try to never go through that yourself!
blu6385
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hell yes ... sorry but htere is no way i am going to try to work on it if he cheated on me and if i cheated on him ... there would neverbe trust ... and if he was physcailly abusive my asss is out that door has quick has can be
Butterfly123
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Posted by ant n tilde
Posted by Songstress
I would never roll my eyes at that. You regularly post about religion and your faith and honestly, I respect that girl. I love the fact that you and your family are so religious and that no one has ever had a divorce. My family is full of divorce. And its horrible. Thats why I intend on this marriage working. Although Im not the most religious, I do look at marriage as VERY SACRED and would never wanna throw it away easily. I do know of some marriages ending because of adultery and physical abuse and emotional abuse and to me those are pretty much the only reasons to justify a divorce
the church recognizes divorce for those reasons. . .actually the (catholic) church isnt as against divorce ( JUSTIFIED divorce) as you may think, they are more against remarriage AFTER divorce. . . but anyway
and i truly believe that people who are the product of a family that has many divorces in it can REALLY turn around and decide that they will not go through that. I compare it to seeing a family member suffer bc of smoking and then deciding to never pick up a cigarette. After seeing how damaging a divorce can be, that will push you THAT MUCH harder to try to never go through that yourself!
AMEN! Im going into this marriage like there is no such thing as divorce. And thats how most people should look at it.
hmv12
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Posted by shopaholic07
I agree with you....divorce should be a last resort. Couples should communicate and work things out--or possibly get counseling--if they are having trouble.
I agree...Cheating and abuse I don't tolerate though
RKellner
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I would try and do all that is possible to save my marriage... However there are some things that cant be fixed and if it became an unhealthy environment for my children, then yes I would leave him... But under very few circumstances....
Toucan311
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Of course it wouldnt be something I'd hope for, but if FH came home and told me he, I dunno, impreganated our 18 year old babysitter, I think I'd have a bit of a hard time stomaching him.
As for physical abuse, if it ever happened I think my dad and my brother would take matters into their own hands before any court papers got a chance to be filed
FuTuRe MrS MaZz
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Wow look at the way the poll is going... no wonder why 50% gets divorced....
i believe that you are in it for the long haul.... if thigns get rough, you go to counseling... if things dont get better... find a diff counselor
Espo22
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz
Wow look at the way the poll is going... no wonder why 50% gets divorced....
i believe that you are in it for the long haul.... if thigns get rough, you go to counseling... if things dont get better... find a diff counselor
i think ive already proven to myself how much i can fight to make things right and also having to go through difficult obstacles. I agree with you keep trying...SOME circumstances such as cheating and especially numerous times and abuse is different though and i think thats why alot of ppl picked 'depending on the circumstance'
Butterfly123
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Posted by Espo22
Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz
Wow look at the way the poll is going... no wonder why 50% gets divorced....
i believe that you are in it for the long haul.... if thigns get rough, you go to counseling... if things dont get better... find a diff counselor
i think ive already proven to myself how much i can fight to make things right and also having to go through difficult obstacles. I agree with you keep trying...SOME circumstances such as cheating and especially numerous times and abuse is different though and i think thats why alot of ppl picked 'depending on the circumstance'
Definitely. Thats what the 'depends on circumstance' is for. My mother divorced an abusive man and she tried to work it which ended up being worse for us. Divorce was her only option.
cbcf
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Posted by Espo22
Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz
Wow look at the way the poll is going... no wonder why 50% gets divorced....
i believe that you are in it for the long haul.... if thigns get rough, you go to counseling... if things dont get better... find a diff counselor
i think ive already proven to myself how much i can fight to make things right and also having to go through difficult obstacles. I agree with you keep trying...SOME circumstances such as cheating and especially numerous times and abuse is different though and i think thats why alot of ppl picked 'depending on the circumstance'
agree densie!! and plus alot of people on here said that they would never get a divorce except if there was abuse involved....and i am one of them i am sorry i am not endangering my life or the life of my children to stay in a marriage just because divorce is wrong
cbcf
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz
Wow look at the way the poll is going... no wonder why 50% gets divorced....
i believe that you are in it for the long haul.... if thigns get rough, you go to counseling... if things dont get better... find a diff counselor
there is only so much a therapist can do. i would def go to one and try my hardest in any situation besides abuse but the people in the relationship are what weights heavy on whether a divorce is going to happen or not. if they are not willing to let the therapist help them you cant make it happen
but i dont believe in divorce anyway so....
redjasper32
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Divorce should be an absolute last resort. Counseling shuld always be considered if things are not up to par, however if there is a situation of Mental,verbal or emotional abuse than by all means I say get the heck out quickly and seek a divorce from the motherfufer!
shopaholic07
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Re: another QOTD - could be controversial
Posted by hmv12
Posted by shopaholic07
I agree with you....divorce should be a last resort. Couples should communicate and work things out--or possibly get counseling--if they are having trouble.
I agree...Cheating and abuse I don't tolerate though
