Before I got engaged I was so ready to be engaged and I was thinking about marriage all the time with FH. I mean when I met him, I instantly felt that this is the one I want to be with forever. Lately, I've been feeling like i'm too young to be planning all this (or it may be thoughts from other people making me feel this way)....do you guys think this is normal to feel? Or have any of you felt like this during your planning? It may be just that there is a lot going on in my life right now that is getting to me. I'm in my 3rd year of medical school (so is FH) and we would be getting married in the middle of our 4th year. We will both be 25 by the wedding. Are any of you getting married while still in grad school?
thanks!! just needed to vent a little :)
Dr White
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Yup I am in my fourth year of medical school now and FH just finished law school this past May. Sooo, I totally get it. :o)
(future) Dr. W
jenn4214ever
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
I feel the same way too sometimes. I was dating FH since I was 17 and I am 23 now. I thought about mariage all the time and now... I'm stressed!!!! Its normal, its that this change is real and scary at times. Were growing up! One the wedding is over you will fell so much better. You wont stress about the wedding and you can focus on you and FH building a life together. Don't worry about it, it is normal!
MikesBride2B
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Yup, I'll be in the middle of my Masters when we get married.
Sometimes I feel that 24 is too young, but then when I think about where I always pictured big life events (like kids and such) I realize that this is the perfect time for me to get married...I'm right on schedule
scatteredx12
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
I'll be just a senior in college- I'm only 20 and will be 21 when I get married & FH will be 23, so I feel especially young while I'm planning all of this but at the same time, I feel really lucky to have found the person I want to be with already.
jayepyt
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
no iam 19 but ive been with fh for almost 7 years have 2 kids together so i feel why not he loves me i love him i dont wanna wait another 10 years to get married to long for me jmo
Chanwich
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
I refused to get married until I was done with school to avoid those feelings. Not that I'm too young, I'm almost 29, but just because there is so much going on that takes precedence over planning a wedding, like finishing my degree. It all depends on what your priorities are, and personally for me, getting married wasn't one of them. But I am probably in the minority here
drivwal
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
I will be in grad school and FH will be at Stony Brook working on his undergrad (4 years in the military made him be a little far behind) I feel like I would rather get this done sooner rather than later because I want to be able to enjoy our lives as newlyweds without feeling too much pressure about having children right away. I know that sounds selfish but I want time with my hubby. We live together now and have been for two years so I know what its like to live together but I want time married and living together to teach us a few lessons about each other before we have kids. So...I am ready to get married and start to live two lives as one. This seems like a very normal feeling you have and it will pass. Don't stress too much, it will all work out in the end!
peaches42587
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Don't worry. I sometimes feel that way too but I want to marry my FH more than anything. I am hoping to just start grad school this fall so I will be just finishing grad school hopefully when we get married. Don't stress it, everything will be fine and those feelings will pass. It's not about age its about you and FH starting your life together.
sandybeaches115
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Thanks girls!! It's not like I don't want to marry FH yet...i guess sometimes i'm too focused on what ppl will think...'oh you aren't done with school yet.' but the truth is i've been in school forever, finished college 2 years ago and medicine is a life long thing...so there's never going to really be a true moment where i'm 'free' for wedding planning. I mean once im done with my MD then there's residency etc. I guess sometimes i worry too much! thanks again
MrsL2010
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Posted by Chanwich
I refused to get married until I was done with school to avoid those feelings. Not that I'm too young, I'm almost 29, but just because there is so much going on that takes precedence over planning a wedding, like finishing my degree. It all depends on what your priorities are, and personally for me, getting married wasn't one of them. But I am probably in the minority here
i happen to agree with you. i always said i wasn't getting married until i finished grad school and had my own classroom and settled in a great school......that's happened, and now i'm getting married (i'll be 31 when i get married)
MarjorieFrank
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
I am 21 and will be two weeks shy of 23 when we get married. I always wanted to get married young so I don't feel too young. FH waited until I finished college before he proposed because we both wanted that out of the way. Sometimes it is a little bit of pressure, but only with financials, but I have been working a full-time job for over 2 years and FH is older than me and more settled in his job so it's all good.
MrsCM
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
I'm getting married and I'm back in school for another degree right now and FH is working on his masters. I'll be 25 at the wedding and FH will be 24 but I think everyone is different. We got out and experienced life early on and are in a different place than many people our age but only you know how you feel, it would be terrible to feel as if you wake up and didn't experience enough before getting married.
leeserd
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Not to scare anyone but people wo get married in their early twenties have the highest divorce rates. I didn't make this up...you can look it up, its true. I would imagine that is because it is very important to have a strong sense of who you are as an individual before you allign your self with someone else. It is important to know that you can stand on your own without this other person. Like do you know what it is like to have your own apartment and have to pay rent, utilities, cable, a car payment, and student loan payments all by yourself with no one else to turn to? These things are very important. Then you add the stress of being in school on top of that and it can get very hard because you don't have 2 full incomes and there is alot of pressure. My adivce would be if you can wait until your older then you'll be better off. If you love each other then its not going anywhere. Your gut feeling is usually correct so if you feel like your too young and your not ready for all of this then your probably not but you will be in a few years so just wait a lil while.
mrsjpc3
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
i was 31 when we got married last yr. I still feel too young to be married.
M_Berk-Glenn
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Im 23 now I'll be 25 when were married... FH & I live together...we love each other and we dont see a point in waiting any longer. I never wanted to live with a man unless we were married and now Im glad we moved in first! We have first hand experience in handling certain situations...no matter how much you talk abt things you nvr know what your goin to do until your in that situation!!!
He told me he wanted to marry me from day one, I ignored him bcuz I didnt want to get caught up in a YAY IM GETTING MARRIED fantasy world!!!!
We talked this out over and over before I said YES...theres nothing wrong with him making me an honest woman We live as married couple anyway...minus the title, lic and the name
I do believe you know when your ready and if you doubt yourself should step back and take time to REALLY think things through...
geegee827
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Age is just a number! I was 37 when FH and I met. He proposed a month before I turned 40 and I will be 41 when we say 'I do.'
There are days when I feel like we're too young to get married (he's 42)!
Stop worrying about what people will think. Opinions are like ***holes - everyone's got one.
Cassie15
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Don't worry it happens to all of us. I got married three months before my bday so I was shy from 25 and DH was still 25. Young would be like 20, 21 but def not 25! We were fortunate we were way done with college and settling in our careers. I give both of you thumbs up for planning your wedding as well as finishing with grad school.
sandybeaches115
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Posted by Cassie15
Don't worry it happens to all of us. I got married three months before my bday so I was shy from 25 and DH was still 25. Young would be like 20, 21 but def not 25! We were fortunate we were way done with college and settling in our careers. I give both of you thumbs up for planning your wedding as well as finishing with grad school.
Thanks so much for your kind comment! And to everyone else as well!
Katlyco
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Re: Anyone feel too young...
Posted by MarjorieFrank
I am 21 and will be two weeks shy of 23 when we get married. I always wanted to get married young so I don't feel too young. FH waited until I finished college before he proposed because we both wanted that out of the way. Sometimes it is a little bit of pressure, but only with financials, but I have been working a full-time job for over 2 years and FH is older than me and more settled in his job so it's all good.
Sounds like we live the same life. I'm 21 and will be 23 within 3 months of us being newlyweds. I hear the 'are you ready' speech everytime someone finds out my age and personally I don't think I should have to defend my reasons for wanting to get married. When you know, you know
