Just curious... my parents are footing about 80% of the wedding costs, we're doing about 20% and my fiance's mom is doing the rehearsal dinner...
I know there are different versions of who should pay what depending on what 'tradition' you go by... how is everyone here doing it? I would like to ask his mom to help with limos or videographer or something to help lessen the blow for us. It's so awkward and stressful!
Soon2BeMrsS
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
FH & I keep having an argument about this, his parents offered to pay for everything, my famiy can't & hasn't offered any help. Part of me feels as though I should pay for it b/c of tradition, but FH says that we're stupid if we don't allow his parents to do this for us
Maybride519
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
No. FH's parents are not contributing anything. FH and I are paying for the entire wedding ourselves and my parents are hosting the rehersal dinner.
thelilacone
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
At this point we'll be lucky if his mom comes of her own free will (his sister has told his mom that she will tie her up and drag her to the wedding if she has to). My folks offered to help, and I would like them to cover the cost of the hall, but we'll see how that goes cause my dad lost his job last year and now they owe a bunch in taxes. For the most part my FH and I have been paying all the deposits so far.
marcandjoanna
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
My FH and I both work in social service and he is still in school, so we are really not able to pay for the wedding, although I would love to be able to help. My parents are paying for almost everything. His parents offered a fixed amount, which was nice, but I wish they would have asked what things cost before offering an amount. They are barely covering anything and then told us that the rd should come from that money. It makes me feel so angry and frustrated, but I don't want my fh to feel bad, nor do I want to seem as though I don't appreciate the help.... u I just accept what's offered, graciously share what's happening with the planning, smile and hope for the best... but, urgh!
BlueTulip
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
Posted by Soon2BeMrs.S
FH & I keep having an argument about this, his parents offered to pay for everything, my famiy can't & hasn't offered any help. Part of me feels as though I should pay for it b/c of tradition, but FH says that we're stupid if we don't allow his parents to do this for us
How nice! If they can and they offered to, I think you should totally take them up on their offer-as long as you can still have 'your' wedding and they are not the controlling type.
bridy06
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
They paid for the honeymoon and are paying for our RD.
weddingbunny
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
Both of our sets of parents are being very generous. I appreciate their help so much, without it we would never be able to have the wedding we wanted - or we'd have to wait years and years and years before we could get married!
Anyway, my parents are contributing most of it, but FH's parents have offered (to him, I need to check with them myself on this) to cover the band and the photographer, which is a HUGE help, as those are the next most expensive things to the hall. I have to sit down with them and make sure that they really are paying for it and that it's not just FH saying they are... not that he would say so if they hadn't offered, but they might have mentioned it but not set it in stone. I'm not sure if they are covering the rehearsal dinner, we haven't gotten that far yet. They mentioned when we first got engaged that they would, but I don't like to count on these things.
MrsMagoo
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
Me and FH are paying for the wedding ourselves. As far as I know so far - my parents offered to pay for my dress and the favors, along with the engagment party. His parents offered to do all tips the day of the wedding as well as the Rehearsal Dinner.
ewickens
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
FH parent's are only paying for the RD - and they are complaining to me with the number of people I'm inviting - shouldn't the husband of my reader be invited or the wife of my brother who is bringing up the gifts? - GIVE ME A BREAK!!! We're paying for the Church and my parents are footing the bill for the reception.
SIBride06
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
Nothing!!
dani18
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
Well….originally my IL’s were going to pay for the Band and the Rehersal Dinner….Lets just say that there has been a turn of events these past couple of days and neither one seem to be the case anymore….because of the following: 1. The IL’s want 50 % Greek music played at our wedding. I am not greek and don’t care much for Greek music....so I am only agreeing to 1/3 Greek and the rest American. Apparently this is not enough and I’m being selfish and unreasonable and I am not respecting their traditions. I’m sorry…did I ever say I didn’t want ANY Greek music…NO!!!! Plus…the wedding is divided into 1/3 my parents guests, 1/3 IL’s guests and 1/3 our guests. WHO THE HELL DO THEY THINK THEY ARE?!?!?!?
2. We have agreed to get married at the GO Church but we are going to raise our kids Catholic. Well this seems to be a problem as well….because my IL’s stated that they “don’t do” communions…whatever that means. And before we agreed to get married in their church…my FIL made a comment to my FH that if we got married in a catholic church he would not walk down the isle and what not. And because we mentioned the whole catholic children….once again….I am not being respectful to their traditions. What about my traditions!?!? Isn’t the brides father supposed to give away his daughter at their house of worship?!?!? I feel that I’m being more than accommodating.
This is getting out of control! We talk about our wedding with our friends and they are so happy for us. I talk to my family about our wedding and they are so excited to celebrate…and only give advise or help when we ask for it. And then we talk to my IL’s and its always a hassle.
OHH did I mention that they are threatening to not invite People because they aren’t going to have a good time if there isn’t a lot of greek music and they keep telling us that its going to hurt us…people the people they are going to disinvite are VERY generous people….and we probably wont meet our minimum.
This is what I’m going through right now…so I think its safe to say that NO MY IL’s AREN’t PAYING FOR ANYHTING AND AT THIS POINT they can shove their money up their ***.
Thanks for listening…sorry for this longgggggggg VENT!
schmoogan
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
In our wedding, everyone is contributing equal amounts. Me & FH might have to put in a little bit more, but only if we want some extra things added on (i.e. honeymoon stuff, our own personal stuff).
sarahradio5
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
Posted by dani18
Well….originally my IL’s were going to pay for the Band and the Rehersal Dinner….Lets just say that there has been a turn of events these past couple of days and neither one seem to be the case anymore….because of the following: 1. The IL’s want 50 % Greek music played at our wedding. I am not greek and don’t care much for Greek music....so I am only agreeing to 1/3 Greek and the rest American. Apparently this is not enough and I’m being selfish and unreasonable and I am not respecting their traditions. I’m sorry…did I ever say I didn’t want ANY Greek music…NO!!!! Plus…the wedding is divided into 1/3 my parents guests, 1/3 IL’s guests and 1/3 our guests. WHO THE HELL DO THEY THINK THEY ARE?!?!?!?
2. We have agreed to get married at the GO Church but we are going to raise our kids Catholic. Well this seems to be a problem as well….because my IL’s stated that they “don’t do” communions…whatever that means. And before we agreed to get married in their church…my FIL made a comment to my FH that if we got married in a catholic church he would not walk down the isle and what not. And because we mentioned the whole catholic children….once again….I am not being respectful to their traditions. What about my traditions!?!? Isn’t the brides father supposed to give away his daughter at their house of worship?!?!? I feel that I’m being more than accommodating.
This is getting out of control! We talk about our wedding with our friends and they are so happy for us. I talk to my family about our wedding and they are so excited to celebrate…and only give advise or help when we ask for it. And then we talk to my IL’s and its always a hassle.
OHH did I mention that they are threatening to not invite People because they aren’t going to have a good time if there isn’t a lot of greek music and they keep telling us that its going to hurt us…people the people they are going to disinvite are VERY generous people….and we probably wont meet our minimum.
This is what I’m going through right now…so I think its safe to say that NO MY IL’s AREN’t PAYING FOR ANYHTING AND AT THIS POINT they can shove their money up their ***.
Thanks for listening…sorry for this longgggggggg VENT!
Did they get the memo that this is YOUR wedding? Unbelievable... What does your FH say?
Boston&NY2006
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
FH's parents are paying for the RD, and the day after brunch. I was pleasantly surprised when they offered to pay for the brunch, we had planned on paying for it ourselves.
dani18
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
Right now...he hates them...and can't stand to even be in the same room as them. He doesnt understand how they can stoop so low. We are both on the same page. Its just crazy. I don't know where these people come from. SO PISSED!
jada2destiny
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
FH's parents are paying for ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!
scorps1027
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
our parents are paying 50/50 for the whole thing.
CLMon7906
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
um, his parents are actually paying for almost everything. they are great.
i heart my FILs
sugarkube4
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
My FH's mom and dad are divorced and btwn the 2 of them they don't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of.. it annoys me bc my mom is paying for my dress, our flowers, the limos, and probably the rehearsal dinner.. whatever.. what can I do, I am marrying him and not his dysfunctional family.. oh wait.. I am marrying into the dysfunctional family!!!
beachychic
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Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?
FH's parent's are paying 1/3 (my parent's are paying 1/3 and we're paying 1/3) . . . we all thought this was most fair.
