Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

Original post by sarahradio5

Jan 19, 2006 11:38 AM

Just curious... my parents are footing about 80% of the wedding costs, we're doing about 20% and my fiance's mom is doing the rehearsal dinner...

I know there are different versions of who should pay what depending on what 'tradition' you go by... how is everyone here doing it? I would like to ask his mom to help with limos or videographer or something to help lessen the blow for us. It's so awkward and stressful!

OctBride05 Posted: Jan 19, 2006 10:38 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

Yes, fh parents paid for my shower, bought my jewelry, got me my card box, and are doing the rehersal dinner.

My parents gave us NOTHING.

Sunrise813 Posted: Jan 19, 2006 11:09 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

Well we are paying for everything our selves, his parents are payng for the rehearsal dinner and have offered to pay of the florist and my family is paying for the bridal show

His parents have also offered to pay for the florist or limos, but FH & I feel bad having them pay for anything, so we told them the RD than genorous on their part.

autumn Posted: Jan 19, 2006 11:26 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

My dad is giving 10 %, my mom is giving 5 % and we are paying the remaining. I am not sure if FH parents are giving anything. When I bring it up, he gets alittle annoyed and isn't sure how much they can contribute.

luvmesumhim Posted: Jan 19, 2006 11:34 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

we're the sole sponsors.... anything anyone contributes will be a pure blessing!!!1

BrideInBlue Posted: Jan 20, 2006 04:51 AM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

When we got engaged the first this my fil's did was go up to my parents and tell them that they wanted to help pay for the wedding....since then they have offered no financial help and have done nothing but complain about how expensive everything is and how when they got married(25 yrs ago!!!!) they paid $25pp and it incuded all the flowers. I tried to explain that they obviously havent seen what weddings cost today but they still complain and say we should have looked at more placed( not that i think theyd be offering money if we had picked differently) and on top of fact that they dont seem to be offering to pay for anything Fmil thinks shes going to invite all her friends who i've never met and fh hasnt seen in years. My parents, even though they really cant afford to pay for it, intend on paying for it all because they don't feel that we should have to.
All i know is that if they complain about one more thing that has nothing to do with them at this point I may not be able to comtrol what comes out of my mouth !!!

PegaLega Posted: Jan 20, 2006 06:25 AM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

yep-my parents and his are both paying for the reception-we are doing everything else

SweetCin704 Posted: Jan 20, 2006 06:27 AM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

Yes, they paid for our eparty & our band & probably our rehearsal dinner.

lipglossjunky73 Posted: Jan 20, 2006 08:40 AM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

my dad has a lot of money, and FH's dad is going thru bankruptsy...

My parents keep asking me - well, what are THEY doing - I'm like - look, heres their number - YOU call them and ask - I certainly won't!!!

Junebride3 Posted: Jan 20, 2006 09:40 AM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

Nope!

m&m Posted: Jan 20, 2006 01:22 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

My In Laws paid for NOTHING - not even the rehearsal dinner.

ETA: Ok, that came out really snotty - its a touchy subject only because they made a lot of demands about who MUST be invited, what we 'had to do,' etc. for the wedding, and my surprise shower, which was thrown by mother - and demanded their family have so many guests, that my mother could no longer afford to invite anyone from MY family.

Then they gave us a really hard time when we told them we couldn't afford to throw a huge party after our second wedding ceremony (the first ceremony which was followed by the reception was Catholic, the second Greek Orthodox; they are GO)....

And had the nerve to ask what my parents gave as a gift...(my parents paid for the entire reception).

futuremrsGafforio Posted: Jan 20, 2006 04:00 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

My FH's parents are paying for the band and RD....I'm pretty happy with that....

JPCP4806 Posted: Jan 20, 2006 04:02 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

my parents are paying 99.9 % of it right down to favors and everything. FH parents are divorced ... Mom isnt doing diddly his dad is paying for the rehersal dinner.

Mel329 Posted: Jan 20, 2006 04:13 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

My FI parents aren't paying for anything except the rehearsald dinner. My parents are paying for the hall and are probably going to give me money here and there, like offering to pay $2000 of the photography. My FI family is not well off, but I wish they would offer something else. Like some of the other ladies said, I feel bad for my parents paying for a lot of it and his paying for nothing. They didn't even give us an engagement present or an engagement card which really pisses me off!

Angel2006 Posted: Jan 20, 2006 04:17 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

They are not paying one G*d damn thing!!! They said they were going to pay for our HM but then never mentioned it again so looks like we are going to have to come up with another 10k

carlsbride Posted: Jan 20, 2006 04:19 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

Yes, they have offered to pay for certain vendors and the RD.

JPCP4806 Posted: Jan 20, 2006 04:20 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

this just in- Just got off the phone with my mother and my MOH and my cousin (one of my BM) asked her why my future step mom in law and future mother in law isnt helping with the BS... My MOH Stated that her mother ( FMIL) has no money... OK THATS WHY YOU HAVE ALL NEW FURNITURE and A PLASMA TV HANGING ON THE WALL... Brand new.. Just cheap when it comes to other people.

pupidda122505 Posted: Jan 20, 2006 04:24 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

Posted by Mel329

My FI parents aren't paying for anything except the rehearsald dinner. My parents are paying for the hall and are probably going to give me money here and there, like offering to pay $2000 of the photography. My FI family is not well off, but I wish they would offer something else. Like some of the other ladies said, I feel bad for my parents paying for a lot of it and his paying for nothing. They didn't even give us an engagement present or an engagement card which really pisses me off!

JPCP4806 Posted: Jan 20, 2006 04:27 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

my parents are paying 40,000 just for the dinners. Its the least FIL's can do. Limos... Flowers... Dj.. whats killing me is that on the wedding day people are going to come up to them and thank them for a great party and THEY DIDNT GIVE IT!!!!!!!!!! Im going to make a toast to my parents thanking them for giving us our dream wedding.. I will probably have a divorce after that but I cant let them accept all the credit for NOTHING!

lrs2005 Posted: Jan 20, 2006 04:38 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

They paid for their guests (food), DHs tux, FILs and BILs tuxes and MILs dress. After the wedding they gave us some $$.

7706bride Posted: Jan 20, 2006 11:06 PM

Re: Are your fiance's parents paying for anything?

Posted by sarahradio5

LOL... nice to know I'm not in this boat alone! I hate to sound like an ingrate for the rehearsal dinner, but my parents are sacrificing a lot to do this, including not going on their 60th anniversary vacation or to A.C. (which is a BIG sacrifice for my mom) and my dad's working major OT. MY FH's mom, who I LOVE, just retired and moved to FL. I wish MY dad could retire now! What's tradition? Isn't it limos, rehearsal dinner, maybe honeymoon help or something, liquor (which is ridiculous since it's included in the per plate cost?) from the groom's side? It's such a sensitive subject, especially since my FH's dad isn't with us anymore... I wish help was just OFFERED a little bit more from his mom. I asked my FH to ask her for a little help... he didn't seem happy about it, but we'll see what happens. Every little bit helps! You're right... it IS nice to vent! Thanks!

You are not alone!!! You sound just like me!!! same story here.
His parents are doing things the 'traditional' way..Bride's family pays for all!
My family is paying for the whole reception, the invitations, all the extras we need for the day, my gown, veil, tiara..
They gave us a beautiful E-Party and my mom gave me a wonderful shower!!!
My FIL's have not even brought up the rehersal dinner to me yet!