Asking for an honest opinion but not really wanting one

the fact that trick or treating may possibly be taking precedence over a family members wedding is ridiculous. I dont think people who get married on a holiday weekend are selfish, it just happens to work for them, whether it be price-wise or other.

We got married Thanksgiving weekend last year (Sat nite) and a few distant relatives on DH's side didnt make it. But we had OOT guests that came and wouldnt miss if for the world. The people that you really want there will be there.

It's Halloween evening. It's not christmas eve, it's not easter sunday.

I'm having a Halloween wedding but I'm inviting kids and asking them to dress up in costume (only the kids though!). I'm going to have a HUGE candy bar at the end so the kids feel like they're going trick or treating.

Honestly, your family needs to get over it. There will be another Halloween next year and every year there after. There's no one on the other side of the family that could take those kids trick or treating? No friends from school they could tag along with?

Bottom line is, EVERY wedding day is going to inconvience at least one guest but if they all love you, they'll see past that.

This Halloween bride doesn't give a you know what about what others think of choosing that date!

This isn't meant rude but there's an old saying about don't ask an for an honest answer if your not truly prepared to hear something you don't want to hear.

I don't think its such a big deal. They can go during the day and they get a halloween party at school AND if they are sooo upset then why don't ask someone to babysit for them like a grandparent, aunt, uncle, close friend and ask them to take the kids trick or treating!
Honestly I've learned that no matter what you do someone will find something to complain about! Just do what makes YOU happy!

Well you asked for her opinion, and you got it... you just didn't like what you heard... so don't ask anymore moms - because that's pretty much what you'll hear from anyone with school age kids.

They're kids.... they don't give a hoot about weddings... they obviously don't read this site or watch Bridezillas. Bottom line: It's their 3rd biggest event of the year after Xmas and B-days.

Like I said, don't ask anymore, and don't stress about it. The plan is the plan. You will never please everyone, and no day will work for everyone invited.

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Posted by Nitania13

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Posted by Tracey1979

can't they trick or treat earlier in the day, before your wedding???

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ITA! I don't see why they can't do trick or treating or other halloween stuff earlier in the day?

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The children of OOT guests won't be able to go trick-or-treating w/ their friends. Also, where I grew up in New Paltz----kids can only go trick-or-treating in the evening---not all day....Long Island is different than a lot of places.

I love holiday weddings...but I don't have kids. I think it would be so cute if the little kids wore costumes to the wedding. Imagine the picture of you surrounded by little costumes!
People love to complain to brides....everyone had an issue with my date, Saturday July 26. What are you going to do!
Honestly, people will use anything as an excuse. It was the hardest lesson of being a bride.

I don't have any kids. But I would imagine that if I did they would want to go trick or treating and I would take great pleasure in getting them all dressed up and taking them. I know there's another one year after year.. but you really don't get that many years where your kids are small. SO I can TOTALLY understand where she is coming from... and even moreso I FULLY understand the kids point of view. To them weddings aren't fun! they can't even drink and they usually aren't with a bunch of their friends... they are with adults if they even get to go to the party.

I think you should have somewhat expected this type of answer from a mother, esp since you asked for an HONEST opinion.

Let's face it... there's a reason why those dates are less $$$.

With all that being said.. the truth is that's the day you picked. They will deal with it, work around it, get over it if they are even frazzled by it in the first place. Truth be told... it's not the end of the world. And like I said they can make other arrangements for the kids during the day. Just know that it's going to be a long day for those parents.. to wake up early, get the kids all dressed up then walk around the neighborhood with them trick or treating, only to rush home and get ready for a wedding. It's a lot in one day.. even if it falls on a Sat.

However, if I had kids and IF I was upset over this.. I wouldn't say that to the bride... but then again you opened that can of worms by asking for her honest opinion... so i can't even say she was being rude by telling you the truth when you asked for it in the first place.

Personally... as an adult, I wouldn't mind a Halloween wedding at all! I like to party it up on Halloween anyway! However, I might be upset if I had to miss a Halloween party... but Weddings are once in a lifetime...and to miss a halloween party for someone who I'm close with's wedding then it's well worth it. Anyone who feels differently can just RSVP NO!!! No one is obligated to go to a wedding! So if they really don't like it then they don't have to come.

All in all I have to say I'm not the biggest fan of holiday weddings... by Holiday weddings... I mean the big ones! The small holiday's are no biggie! I also think what a lot of brides don't realize is that although it's less expensive to have a wedding on those days... other charges might be higher... like hotel prices (and that's out of your guests pockets) and florists depending on the holiday, etc. so thats something to think about.

Again though.. bottom line is, it's your wedding... and they will get over it! Not only that... but it's going to be on that day no matter what so why waste time being upset over what other people might think about it now? It's not worth it. Those thoughts should have been ironed out before you booked the day not months before it arrives. No use crying over spilled milk.

You will have a fabulous time on your wedding and I DOUBT you will be thinking about this on your wedding day. I say just let it go!

Just wanted to add that those of you who booked Halloween for an actualy Halloween wedding ... for it to be cool and different.. I actually think that's AWESOME!! When I first saw some pics of things and realized what some of you were doing.. I have to admit I was a little bit taken aback.. not in a bad way.. but just something that NEVER occured to me to do and not so much something I would do... but yet something that was off beat and totally awesome! It will sooooo set your wedding aside!

I don't have any children but I don't think there is anything wrong with you having your wedding on Halloween. But this is coming from someone that completely forgot about it this year As others stated, it's more common for parents to take their children out trick-or-treating earlier in the day anyway.

I have kids and love to take them trick or treating but if it was someones wedding I would make other arrangements. They do not have to go they can say no like others on here have said.

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Posted by KerriJohnS


Let's face it... there's a reason why those dates are less $$$.

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Oh trust me, we are saving NO money by having it on Halloween! Prices at my rh drastically drop the day after when it turns from October to November.

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Posted by MrsDtoBe09

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Posted by KerriJohnS


Let's face it... there's a reason why those dates are less $$$.

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Oh trust me, we are saving NO money by having it on Halloween! Prices at my rh drastically drop the day after when it turns from October to November.

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I'm surprised because that wasn't the case for anyplace I looked at. They were all trying to get me to book a holiday and it was less $$. The big one they tried for was the Wed before Thanksgiving.
And my November prices weren't any less than most other months; even some June prices - I had a friend booking for June and their prices weren't that far off from mine. Feb was def a lot less though - had another friend booking a Feb wedding.
In the beginning people were telling me November is a good month becuase it's not that expensive but when I actually went RH shopping that turned out to not be the case at all; for me anyway. Although, I sure do wish it was!! I think it's changed since the weather for November isn't what it used to be. Also, perhaps later November is different too.

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Posted by MrsDtoBe09

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Posted by KerriJohnS


Let's face it... there's a reason why those dates are less $$$.

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Oh trust me, we are saving NO money by having it on Halloween! Prices at my rh drastically drop the day after when it turns from October to November.

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I was offered either Oct 31 or Nov 7th for my wedding at NRC. So within that week the price dropped over $20pp.
I didn't choose Halloween b/c I hate halloween. If the price was relatively the same between both dates, then maybe I would have considered halloween. People can take their kids around for candy either earlier in the day or just respond no.
End of story.

You can pick ANY date and still have someone complaining about it. Who cares, it's your day. you're not there to make every guest happy.

This is a little off topic from where the post originally started, but I don't think most RH's consider Halloween a real Holiday. When I was looking for my hall, WM had that date open and it was the MOST expensive quote I received from any of the 10 places I looked at! October 31st this year is Saturday, so it was considered a Saturday night during prime season.

Edited for spelling.

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Posted by MrsBlueRibbon

This is a little off topic from where the post originally started, but I don't think most RH's consider Halloween a real Holiday. When I was looking for my hall, WM had that date open and it was the MOST expensive quote I received from any of the 10 places I looked at! October 31st this year is Saturday, so it was considered a Saturday night during prime season.

Edited for spelling.

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Really? Why wouldn't Halloween be a holiday? That's odd! To me it's a holiday. But then again.. I guess most people don't get off work for it.

Edit to add that we looked at WM and the June and Feb friends (who don't know eachother) actually both ended up booking WM and the Feb one was like $10,000 less than my date and the June was like $2,000 more. I think all in all it was going to come to roughly $25,000 for November 2009 at WM.

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Posted by MrsBlueRibbon

This is a little off topic from where the post originally started, but I don't think most RH's consider Halloween a real Holiday. When I was looking for my hall, WM had that date open and it was the MOST expensive quote I received from any of the 10 places I looked at! October 31st this year is Saturday, so it was considered a Saturday night during prime season.

Edited for spelling.

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I wouldn't either...it's not a give presents -get together with your family and have a big meal - holiday.