Bachelor Party

I think you have a right to be upset when there are going to be half naked women gyrating in front of your husband-to-be. Have you seen those supposed 'no touching' lap dances? Whoa.
I'd be pissed off too and I wouldn't want him to go either.

I think part of the problem is the reputation Las Vegas has... 'what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas???' Maybe you can compromise and he can go to a gentleman's club right here in New York and then come home to YOU.

Either way talk to him about how it makes you feel. He has to know how it's going to drive you crazy!

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Posted by siffleuse319

In my opinion, both bachelor and bachelorette parties are horribly cheesy. They are so antiquated, and their entire purpose is so contrary to love, marriage, and all it resembles. I have already told my BP that I will be offended if they try to have one for me. As for FH.....I trust him and his Groom's Men implicitly...it's the other douche bags that I think will try to hijack the party. I have heard of multiple stories of men 'getting off' at these parties (for a nominal fee paid for behind the groom's back..and the poor guy starts out not wanting to do anything of the sort, just like all of our FHs say). I can't fathom what would happen if FH got caught up in any of these debaucherous antics....Call me farty, call me an a** or even a controlling, old, biddy....and I'll proudly stand up for each one of those, if it means staying true to my principles. No bachelorette party for me.....No Naked (or Half-Naked) Woman for FH. He should have gotten all that out of his system before proposing.....

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ITA with you.

I wouldn't care what FH does. I trust him 100%. He will have fun, but not ruin what we have......

We are having a co-ed one....heading down to AC having dinner together...breaking up for some fun festivites then meeting up later on that night.....

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Posted by TheFutureMrsM

If i was with a man who insisted that strippers is his last hoorah, of last night of freedom, i would never of accepted a ring from someone like that.

Stripclubs are for men who are single, not for men that have made a commitment to a woman.

And if it is their friends who insist, then tell their friends to go to the strip clubs themselves...I would never tolerate a man who had No Balls, to tell his friends that its not what he wants

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ITA with this too

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Posted by FutureMrsCarrieri

I think you have a right to be upset when there are going to be half naked women gyrating in front of your husband-to-be. Have you seen those supposed 'no touching' lap dances? Whoa.
I'd be pissed off too and I wouldn't want him to go either.

I think part of the problem is the reputation Las Vegas has... 'what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas???' Maybe you can compromise and he can go to a gentleman's club right here in New York and then come home to YOU.

Either way talk to him about how it makes you feel. He has to know how it's going to drive you crazy!

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What you just said is what makes me so upset. If they were going to a Gentleman's Club here in NYC, then I wouldn't be angry. It's the fact that they are going across the country for almost a week and I'm here in NY upset and worried.

speak to FH about it....if it bothers you that much let him know....

WE are doing co-ed so I am not that worried. We are separating for a little and I know they are prob getting a stripper. FH and I spoke about it. He doesn't like it, but all his brother's are single and some of his friends. He said let them have their fun and he will jsut sit back and laugh....he hates that crap....

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Posted by kimandvin

I 100% agree.. Thankfully my FH is not into this nor does he care what he does.. but it's the same thing .. the guys his party are the ones that want the strippers.. I have already warned all of them that there will be no strippers.. this angers me so much that guys get to use this time in their life to make it OK to have strippers all over them.. I think that if you are getting married.. and you feel the need to have a 'last horrah' then maybe you are not in the right mindset . marriage shouldn't be a death bed of fun for you.. it should be a new beginning.. If I were you I would definetely voice your concerns and he should respect them.. We are doing a coed one.. and he was completely fine with it.. I told him if he needs a stripper I will do the job for him LOL! Hope this helps! Good Luck !

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I suggested the coed one. His friends gave me the big fat NO.

Wow!~ I have to say I'm surprised that there are so many mixed emotions on this one! Spices things up a bit!

I'm of the 'live it up, sucka' mindset.

How often do you get a group of ALL your best friends together for one fun night out on the town?

Especially in our case, FH and I don't have the opportunity often. Our BP is from all over - east coast, west coast, up north, down south, etc.

For FH to have the opportunity to have a great night out with them is a once in a lifetime event and he deserves to enjoy it all!!!

If I thought he'd be a dirtbag I wouldn't have accepted the ring.

Lookie, no touchie.

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Posted by beachbum05

Wow!~ I have to say I'm surprised that there are so many mixed emotions on this one! Spices things up a bit!

I'm of the 'live it up, sucka' mindset.

How often do you get a group of ALL your best friends together for one fun night out on the town?

Especially in our case, FH and I don't have the opportunity often. Our BP is from all over - east coast, west coast, up north, down south, etc.

For FH to have the opportunity to have a great night out with them is a once in a lifetime event and he deserves to enjoy it all!!!

If I thought he'd be a dirtbag I wouldn't have accepted the ring.

Lookie, no touchie.

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Amen, Sista.

Btw, I saw a license plate that said 'B3achbum' and thought of you!

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Posted by Mimacat

Why would he touch them!

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He wouldn't touch, but they do. Lap Dancing is touching.

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Posted by Mimacat

Amen, Sista.

Btw, I saw a license plate that said 'B3achbum' and thought of you!

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Hi there! Did you buy/steal it for me?

when i was younger i used to think about this and thought i'd be upset

this so does not phase me anymore

wow, maybe i really am getting old

FH and i were talking about our HM cruise and getting massages so he asked if he could get a happy ending - my response was, 'Go right ahead - less work for me'

LOL

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Posted by Mimacat

Why would he touch them!

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I think MOST bachelors (not all) will be getting lapdances at their bachelor party. The guys attending will generally take it as their job to make sure that the bachelor has a stripper on his lap at some points during the night.

The contact thing is what I'm not a fan of. The strip club itself, I agree with what you said before. Just watching live porn. No biggie.

So, not to stir the pot....but I'm legitimately curious/naive...

Why does the idea of strippers/lap dances bother some of you so much?

Is it the thought that FH would get caught up in the moment and touch the women?

Is it the fact that he's looking at someone other than you when they're naked?

I feel like there has to be a level of mistrust in there for someone to have that kind of a reaction - but again, maybe I'm seriously not 'getting it.'

BTW - I'm honestly not trying to trivialize or belittle anyones feeling or opinions....I'm just curious why people have such a strong reaction.

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Posted by lwny427

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Posted by Mimacat

Why would he touch them!

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I think MOST bachelors (not all) will be getting lapdances at their bachelor party. The guys attending will generally take it as their job to make sure that the bachelor has a stripper on his lap at some points during the night.

The contact thing is what I'm not a fan of. The strip club itself, I agree with what you said before. Just watching live porn. No biggie.

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They can watch all they want. The idea of another woman grinding on my FH makes me sick. He's laying right next to me and understands me completely. I just know there is no convincing his friends.

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Posted by beachbum05

So, not to stir the pot....but I'm legitimately curious/naive...

Why does the idea of strippers/lap dances bother some of you so much?

Is it the thought that FH would get caught up in the moment and touch the women?

Is it the fact that he's looking at someone other than you when they're naked?

I feel like there has to be a level of mistrust in there for someone to have that kind of a reaction - but again, maybe I'm seriously not 'getting it.'

BTW - I'm honestly not trying to trivialize or belittle anyones feeling or opinions....I'm just curious why people have such a strong reaction.

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Someone else touching them and making them aroused. I trust him. I know he won't be touching them. However, there is someone who is not me touching MY man. To me, it's sick.