Bachelor Party

I wouldnt say that i am crazy about it; but i do totally trust him

He actually doesnt want one, but his brother is making it

its january 19th so i guess i will go out that night
LOL

try not to let it bother you. remember why you are marrying him.

honestly i feel like the bachelor party is really for the FH's friends more than anyone else these days!! they use it as an excuse to go nuts, and more often than not, the bachelor is more concernerd about making sure he doesn't do anything to upset his lady!

your FH will be fine and i'm sure the BM who understands your concerns....will make sure he doesn't do anything out of line. i wanted my DH to have a great party---he did....and it was all good!

If i was with a man who insisted that strippers is his last hoorah, of last night of freedom, i would never of accepted a ring from someone like that.

Stripclubs are for men who are single, not for men that have made a commitment to a woman.

And if it is their friends who insist, then tell their friends to go to the strip clubs themselves...I would never tolerate a man who had No Balls, to tell his friends that its not what he wants

I hate bachelor parties because it so hyped up to be a wild crazy night. FH is a great guy and he has really nice friends. My guy friends, who he has become close with, are great friends but AWFUL guys. They are nasty. I love them to pieces, but they are just nasty. I know the bachelor party will be more about them than it is about FH. I just don't like FH being a part of their antics and crazy stories in that way. I trust him completely, but just don't like him being around the stunts that they pull. I'm fine with seeing strippers, but not so keen on lap dances. I just don't feel like us getting married is a good reason for FH to be having a sexual interaction with another naked woman. I don't get the logic. They wanted to go to Mardi Gras for his bachelor party. While I didn't say no, b/c I don't feel like it is my role to tell FH what he can and can't do, I told him it made me uncomfortable. Strippers in a strip club is one thing...trashy topless random drunk girls hooking up with my guy friends in their hotel room is a different story all together! FH called it off when I explained how I felt about it, so now I think they are going to do a regular strip club night. For the one night I'm kind of okay with it, but I just don't really like the whole idea of it. I told him I'm fine with Vegas or any other travel, just did not like Mardi Gras.

I have to say, I really am not a bachelorette party fan either. I think they are cheesy in general. I don't think it's appropriate to think of it as your last night of freedom either, b/c you aren't really a single guy or girl anymore....you're engaged! And it's not like your life ends when you get married.

So, to sum it up, I am with you. Not thrilled about the bachelor party. It will happen, it will come and go and then we'll get on with our lives. It upsets me too and I can understand why it upsets you.

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Posted by lwny427

I hate bachelor parties because it so hyped up to be a wild crazy night. FH is a great guy and he has really nice friends. My guy friends, who he has become close with, are great friends but AWFUL guys. They are nasty. I love them to pieces, but they are just nasty. I know the bachelor party will be more about them than it is about FH. I just don't like FH being a part of their antics and crazy stories in that way. I trust him completely, but just don't like him being around the stunts that they pull. I'm fine with seeing strippers, but not so keen on lap dances. I just don't feel like us getting married is a good reason for FH to be having a sexual interaction with another naked woman. I don't get the logic. They wanted to go to Mardi Gras for his bachelor party. While I didn't say no, b/c I don't feel like it is my role to tell FH what he can and can't do, I told him it made me uncomfortable. Strippers in a strip club is one thing...trashy topless random drunk girls hooking up with my guy friends in their hotel room is a different story all together! FH called it off when I explained how I felt about it, so now I think they are going to do a regular strip club night. For the one night I'm kind of okay with it, but I just don't really like the whole idea of it. I told him I'm fine with Vegas or any other travel, just did not like Mardi Gras.

I have to say, I really am not a bachelorette party fan either. I think they are cheesy in general. I don't think it's appropriate to think of it as your last night of freedom either, b/c you aren't really a single guy or girl anymore....you're engaged! And it's not like your life ends when you get married.

So, to sum it up, I am with you. Not thrilled about the bachelor party. It will happen, it will come and go and then we'll get on with our lives. It upsets me too and I can understand why it upsets you.

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i dont feel like its my last night of freedom and not how i am viewing it at all. Personally i know how to handle myself, i didnt go out and hook up with random guys in clubs even when i was single so for mer personally to go out partying means nothing bad, to me its always been out going out with friends dancing and having a good time...I still like clubbing more than FH does now meanwhile he always partied more than i did back in the days, he says its just different now, i tell him its different to ppl like him who did stupic crazy things in the club so that is their view of a club and they associate bad things happenening with clubs. I associate it with dancing and having a good time. Same with a bachelorette party, once its brought up everybody just throws out the whole its bad bc you shouldn't go around thinking its your last night of freedom and doing bad things. I dont see it as my last night of freedom, i have no intentions of doing anything stupid...i think it will be great to go away with friends, have my own personal time with them especially since the wedding planning gets so hectic and this is a way to just involve your close friends and give your attention just to them.

I hate to say this but to automatically think that if you do have a bachelorette party it means youll do bad things then that is just on them and their actions, i know what i can handle and know how i will behave. I dont want ppl to think bc i am having a bachelorette party and looking forward to it means its for bad things, if someones mind goes there then thats just how their mind works but not mine.

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by lwny427

I hate bachelor parties because it so hyped up to be a wild crazy night. FH is a great guy and he has really nice friends. My guy friends, who he has become close with, are great friends but AWFUL guys. They are nasty. I love them to pieces, but they are just nasty. I know the bachelor party will be more about them than it is about FH. I just don't like FH being a part of their antics and crazy stories in that way. I trust him completely, but just don't like him being around the stunts that they pull. I'm fine with seeing strippers, but not so keen on lap dances. I just don't feel like us getting married is a good reason for FH to be having a sexual interaction with another naked woman. I don't get the logic. They wanted to go to Mardi Gras for his bachelor party. While I didn't say no, b/c I don't feel like it is my role to tell FH what he can and can't do, I told him it made me uncomfortable. Strippers in a strip club is one thing...trashy topless random drunk girls hooking up with my guy friends in their hotel room is a different story all together! FH called it off when I explained how I felt about it, so now I think they are going to do a regular strip club night. For the one night I'm kind of okay with it, but I just don't really like the whole idea of it. I told him I'm fine with Vegas or any other travel, just did not like Mardi Gras.

I have to say, I really am not a bachelorette party fan either. I think they are cheesy in general. I don't think it's appropriate to think of it as your last night of freedom either, b/c you aren't really a single guy or girl anymore....you're engaged! And it's not like your life ends when you get married.

So, to sum it up, I am with you. Not thrilled about the bachelor party. It will happen, it will come and go and then we'll get on with our lives. It upsets me too and I can understand why it upsets you.

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i dont feel like its my last night of freedom and not how i am viewing it at all. Personally i know how to handle myself, i didnt go out and hook up with random guys in clubs even when i was single so for mer personally to go out partying means nothing bad, to me its always been out going out with friends dancing and having a good time...I still like clubbing more than FH does now meanwhile he always partied more than i did back in the days, he says its just different now, i tell him its different to ppl like him who did stupic crazy things in the club so that is their view of a club and they associate bad things happenening with clubs. I associate it with dancing and having a good time. Same with a bachelorette party, once its brought up everybody just throws out the whole its bad bc you shouldn't go around thinking its your last night of freedom and doing bad things. I dont see it as my last night of freedom, i have no intentions of doing anything stupid...i think it will be great to go away with friends, have my own personal time with them especially since the wedding planning gets so hectic and this is a way to just involve your close friends and give your attention just to them.

I hate to say this but to automatically think that if you do have a bachelorette party it means youll do bad things then that is just on them and their actions, i know what i can handle and know how i will behave. I dont want ppl to think bc i am having a bachelorette party and looking forward to it means its for bad things, if someones mind goes there then thats just how their mind works but not mine.

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I absolutely agree...when and why did bachelor parties become something associated with cheating, lying and worrying? Similar to what you said, you know the way you will behave...I feel the same way

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by lwny427

I hate bachelor parties because it so hyped up to be a wild crazy night. FH is a great guy and he has really nice friends. My guy friends, who he has become close with, are great friends but AWFUL guys. They are nasty. I love them to pieces, but they are just nasty. I know the bachelor party will be more about them than it is about FH. I just don't like FH being a part of their antics and crazy stories in that way. I trust him completely, but just don't like him being around the stunts that they pull. I'm fine with seeing strippers, but not so keen on lap dances. I just don't feel like us getting married is a good reason for FH to be having a sexual interaction with another naked woman. I don't get the logic. They wanted to go to Mardi Gras for his bachelor party. While I didn't say no, b/c I don't feel like it is my role to tell FH what he can and can't do, I told him it made me uncomfortable. Strippers in a strip club is one thing...trashy topless random drunk girls hooking up with my guy friends in their hotel room is a different story all together! FH called it off when I explained how I felt about it, so now I think they are going to do a regular strip club night. For the one night I'm kind of okay with it, but I just don't really like the whole idea of it. I told him I'm fine with Vegas or any other travel, just did not like Mardi Gras.

I have to say, I really am not a bachelorette party fan either. I think they are cheesy in general. I don't think it's appropriate to think of it as your last night of freedom either, b/c you aren't really a single guy or girl anymore....you're engaged! And it's not like your life ends when you get married.

So, to sum it up, I am with you. Not thrilled about the bachelor party. It will happen, it will come and go and then we'll get on with our lives. It upsets me too and I can understand why it upsets you.

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i dont feel like its my last night of freedom and not how i am viewing it at all. Personally i know how to handle myself, i didnt go out and hook up with random guys in clubs even when i was single so for mer personally to go out partying means nothing bad, to me its always been out going out with friends dancing and having a good time...I still like clubbing more than FH does now meanwhile he always partied more than i did back in the days, he says its just different now, i tell him its different to ppl like him who did stupic crazy things in the club so that is their view of a club and they associate bad things happenening with clubs. I associate it with dancing and having a good time. Same with a bachelorette party, once its brought up everybody just throws out the whole its bad bc you shouldn't go around thinking its your last night of freedom and doing bad things. I dont see it as my last night of freedom, i have no intentions of doing anything stupid...i think it will be great to go away with friends, have my own personal time with them especially since the wedding planning gets so hectic and this is a way to just involve your close friends and give your attention just to them.

I hate to say this but to automatically think that if you do have a bachelorette party it means youll do bad things then that is just on them and their actions, i know what i can handle and know how i will behave. I dont want ppl to think bc i am having a bachelorette party and looking forward to it means its for bad things, if someones mind goes there then thats just how their mind works but not mine.

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I don't mean to imply that everyone thinks about bachelor/bachelorette parties as their last night of freedom....I was making a total genarlization and saying that I don't liken WHEN it is viewed that way. I understand that it can just be a fun night out with the girls, and I see nothing whatsoever wrong with that. I agree that tons of girls/guys don't do anything 'bad' on their bachelor/bachelorette party nights. And for the most part, I think they do tend to be completely harmless nights out.

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Posted by LauraD419

He's marrying YOU!!! There's nothing to worry about. Let him have his last night. You know who he's coming home to!

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I am sure she knows hes marrying her, but how is it his last night? I don't see the logic in that, and after talking to my FH he doesnt get how it his last night either.

We both agreed our last night was the night we decided we were going to be together officially.

I totally understand how alot of girls are just not comfortable with it.

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Posted by TheFutureMrsM

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Posted by LauraD419

He's marrying YOU!!! There's nothing to worry about. Let him have his last night. You know who he's coming home to!

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I am sure she knows hes marrying her, but how is it his last night? I don't see the logic in that, and after talking to my FH he doesnt get how it his last night either.

We both agreed our last night was the night we decided we were going to be together officially.

I totally understand how alot of girls are just not comfortable with it.

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well its not really the last night, bc bachelor/bachelorette parties are not done the night before anymore so its usually 2 weeks to a month before lol. So technically its not their last night.

Everyone is different though, i dont think everyone should feel the way i do about this topic but at the same time those who feel differently should also expect that not everybody will feel the same way as you and theres nothing wrong with it. You and your fh feel one way and thats great but somebody else can feel differently and again that is fine too, just bc you think its wrong doesnt mean others need to feel the same way.

I encouraged Fh to go to vegas, i know how much he loves vegas so i thought it'd be perfect for him. His brother mentioned AC to me and i told him that FH wants vegas and that even before he said it his groomsmen said it to him too so not like hes imposing on anybody or asking for too much.

Everyone is gonna have different views on this topic and its not for us to sit here and make others feel the same way as we do...the only thing i can do is just post about how i view things and how i personally feel

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by TheFutureMrsM

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Posted by LauraD419

He's marrying YOU!!! There's nothing to worry about. Let him have his last night. You know who he's coming home to!

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I am sure she knows hes marrying her, but how is it his last night? I don't see the logic in that, and after talking to my FH he doesnt get how it his last night either.

We both agreed our last night was the night we decided we were going to be together officially.

I totally understand how alot of girls are just not comfortable with it.

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well its not really the last night, bc bachelor/bachelorette parties are not done the night before anymore so its usually 2 weeks to a month before lol. So technically its not their last night.

Everyone is different though, i dont think everyone should feel the way i do about this topic but at the same time those who feel differently should also expect that not everybody will feel the same way as you and theres nothing wrong with it. You and your fh feel one way and thats great but somebody else can feel differently and again that is fine too, just bc you think its wrong doesnt mean others need to feel the same way.

I encouraged Fh to go to vegas, i know how much he loves vegas so i thought it'd be perfect for him. His brother mentioned AC to me and i told him that FH wants vegas and that even before he said it his groomsmen said it to him too so not like hes imposing on anybody or asking for too much.

Everyone is gonna have different views on this topic and its not for us to sit here and make others feel the same way as we do...the only thing i can do is just post about how i view things and how i personally feel

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I agree, i hope the original poster can figure something out so that she can be 100% comfortable with his bachelor party

for me personally the way i feel about cheating at bachelore parties is this: if a guy has never cheated then he is not just going to cheat at the bachelor party, if a guy cheats then it s*cks but means he has probably done it before and will continue to do so...i know girls say they hear about what happens at these parties and yes its true. I know a guy who had sex with another woman at his bachelor party but hes cheated before that and cheated even after they got married. If a guy cheats he also doesn't need a bachelor party to do so, he can do it any other time too. And guys are ALOT more likely to hook up with random girls in a club than at a strip club, if they go to an expensive more upscale place, then its alot more strict and in order for them to do anything with a girl they would have to spend some big bucks, even lap dances and getting tables at these places are expensive. These girls just wont jump on any guy, you have to flash quite alot of money to do so

I've never cheated so for me to do it for my bachelorette party makes no sense to me, its about the fact that its not the type of person that i am, and same will go for a guy.

i agree with denise

FH's brother called me and told me the date he is coming from florida

FH really DOES NOT want this at all

I told his brother and he said 'too bad' LOL
im not worried about him cheating AT ALL

i'm more worried about him freaking out and getting pissed at his brother
and i cant tell FH when it is because even though he doesnt want it; i cant ruin his surprise - that would be MEAN

anyway, he hates surprises and said 'if i want anyone's A$$ in my face, it's yours'

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Posted by Espo22

i understand the way you feel bc of what happened to you in the past but you are marrying FH bc he is not the same as your ex, and you can't hold him accountable for what somebody else did to you, if it was the other way around and he held you responsible for an ex's actions, i am sure it would bother you.

I know for me personally, i know people feel differently so don't go jumping down on me just bc you feel differently, everyone is entitled to their opinion. But if my fh tried to tell me what i can or can't do then i would get very upset. I am going to vegas for bachelorette party, not going there to hook up with guys, not going to male strip clubs but to get away with the girls and have fun. But if fh came to me and said i cant do something i really want then that would upset me greatly, for one i would feel like he doesn't trust me...lets say he didn't trust my friends then that would still upset me bc i am not them and just bc others do things, i am not a child that will do whatever everybody else does, i have a mind of my own and can't be forced to do anything i don't want to do.

I remember one couple i knew and they would never let the other one go out alone...i used to ask them why and they both were worried something would happen, to me it didn't make sense bc i used to think, if the second you are away from your SO, you think something will happen then why be with them. I want to be with somebody where i dont have to be up their a** in order for them NOT to cheat, its not a way to live...this is more of an extreme case, so not saying it applies to everybody on here...but i dont want to live like that, i'd rather be alone than with somebody that everytime they went out with friends i thought they would do something.

Forget how his friends are, hes your fh and dont get me wrong guys do stupid things so ill agree with that, but if he hasn't given you any reason throughout your relationship not to trust him then its hard to tell him something...now if he has given you reason to be afraid that is a completely different story but if thats the case, there should be concern regardless not just in reference to the bachelor party

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did you go in my brain and write my thoughts?! I totally am in agreement with all you wrote. These are men not children and they will do what they want to do regardless of how many safeguards are put in place so relax and let him have his day w/ the fellas

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Posted by TheFutureMrsM

If i was with a man who insisted that strippers is his last hoorah, of last night of freedom, i would never of accepted a ring from someone like that.

Stripclubs are for men who are single, not for men that have made a commitment to a woman.

And if it is their friends who insist, then tell their friends to go to the strip clubs themselves...I would never tolerate a man who had No Balls, to tell his friends that its not what he wants

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i couldnt have said it better myself...my FH happens to not have interest in strip clubs, which I am very happy about, and his friends are like 'no we are taking you there' and he said to them 'then dont bother taking me, ill go out by myself for my bachelor party' finally they got the hint... i was very proud of him