Big fight

I haven't heard from him yet.

I'm in my mid to late 30's and so is he. But undoubtedly, immature. I think if I was in my mid 20's I would have been like NEXT, but I have dated a lot of losers and this one was different. He is like no other man I ever met and thats why this decision is hard. I was engaged years ago to and I broke that off and this one came along and everything was perfect, he's immature and can't communicate when he's hurt but he is more often the one to apologize and try to be mature in fights so this is so odd for me. I know my happiness comes first but he was a part of why I was so happy. Just never thought it would end like this.

Thanks again.

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I feel so bad being all sad on a happy exciting wedding site. I'm sorry for bringing anyone down.

Don't fight with your fiancé for stupid reasons and love the one you have for who he is and don't look in the past

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Posted by Marrythatgirl

I haven't heard from him yet.

I'm in my mid to late 30's and so is he. But undoubtedly, immature. I think if I was in my mid 20's I would have been like NEXT, but I have dated a lot of losers and this one was different. He is like no other man I ever met and thats why this decision is hard. I was engaged years ago to and I broke that off and this one came along and everything was perfect, he's immature and can't communicate when he's hurt but he is more often the one to apologize and try to be mature in fights so this is so odd for me. I know my happiness comes first but he was a part of why I was so happy. Just never thought it would end like this.

Thanks again.

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I hear ya about feeling like you're in your 30s and you spent a lot of time in this relationship and you feel like moving on will waste valuable years. But seriously, if this is how he reacts when he is angry or drunk- how many years will go by in a possibly unhappy marriage? How would you feel if he treated any future possible children of yours that way? I'm not saying that you are innocent. The whole ex-girlfriend jealousy thing could be a really hard issue to deal with if him and her share common friends. But he needs to find a better way of telling you that you are being unreasonable (if that's how he feels). I've seen too many people settle into abusive relationships. The toll it takes on them and their families is not worth 'saving face'. If this is an abusive relationship (that's what it sounds like) you need to keep it moving. You will be much happier single in the long run.

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Listen, you sound pretty young.. my HONEST advice to you, woman to woman, is that he needs to cut ties with this ex gf and you need to work on your relationship BEFORE getting married.. I wouldn't even be thinking of marriage. you need to figure out if you should even be together. marriage is not going to fix your problems.. of course people fight but all of those other factors and things you say, don't add up to make a healthy relationship. the truth hurts but value yourself first and make sure that if you want to make a lifetime commitment, you need to not be questioning the person you are making it with or the relationship.. that should be a given

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I understand where you are coming from being in your mid thirties and investing time in a relationship, however how much more time are you willing to invest and be treated this way. You still have not heard from him since the argument and YOU reached out to him. Both of you are at fault however he is not taking any ownership for his behavior and he had more than enough time to see how he acted with a sober head. I am only telling you this from experience but be in a relationship for the right reason and not the wrong. Love yourself more to know you don't deserve to be treated this way.

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Don't let someone's words blind you from their behavior...

Just make sure you make the right choice for yourself and your future.

Good Luck.

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I'm sorry you are going through this. I think you guys really need to sit down and talk everything out. The person I marry would never pick me up and put me outside in what you were wearing. That is extremely disrespectful! We have had a couple of alcohol induced arguments, but they end up with me falling asleep and us talking immediately when we get up (both of us apologizing) Neither of us would ever call each other names, alcohol or not and would never go days without talking. I can hardly go a couple hrs without hearing from him. What you need to do is sit down and think to yourself, are you truly happy with how this relationship is. Is this how you want to feel? You deserve nothing but the best in the man you marry. He should be treating you like a queen! Yes, it sucks if you have to walk away if your unhappy but that's only temporary. If he is the man you feel you are meant to be with (and I mean truly meant to be with), then this can never happen again.

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I feel horrible giving my Heart to a man like this. One thing to put me outside in my underwear, knowing I'll have to drive 30-40 mins having been drinking that night, I told him it's late and he still did it, without concern of my safety. No matter how drunk you are, you don't put your loved one in harms way and he did.

Still have not heard from him so I don't want to ask to talk or call him. I feel like what I texted him was appropriate and if he cared at all, even before walking away for good, he would have apologized and been an upstanding man about it. It's hard to see someone for who they are and not with the rose colored glasses of love on.

Thank you all again for giving me strength, I'm normally a very strong and independent woman but loving this man made me weak and I hate it!

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Sweetie don't ever be hard on yourself for loving someone. It shows that you have courage. Your text to him was more than appropriate and showed that you are a much bigger person than he is. I think what is happening now is his actions are speaking louder than words (not just from the argument the two of you had last week but him avoiding any communication with you whatsoever) Don't allow this situation to harden or heavy your heart because by doing that he wins. I think the more and more time that passes, the more and more you'll start opening your eyes and realize and come to terms with that you deserve more. You are still that strong, independent woman. Don't ever forget that!

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Posted by Kimberley2015

Sweetie don't ever be hard on yourself for loving someone. It shows that you have courage. Your text to him was more than appropriate and showed that you are a much bigger person than he is. I think what is happening now is his actions are speaking louder than words (not just from the argument the two of you had last week but him avoiding any communication with you whatsoever) Don't allow this situation to harden or heavy your heart because by doing that he wins. I think the more and more time that passes, the more and more you'll start opening your eyes and realize and come to terms with that you deserve more. You are still that strong, independent woman. Don't ever forget that!

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This!

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Posted by masmith37

A few things jumped out at me before anything else....1-How in the world did you have a chance to get down to your underwear, when you weren't welcome there? 2-You drove home drunk? 3-If you are worried about ex girlfriends or anyone else in the picture, your relationship isn't ready for marriage at all. Especially if he thinks he can kick you out of places-that's downright immature. And if you're worried about exes, either he is not doing his part to make you feel like the most magical thing he's ever laid eyes on, or you're insecure..or both. I am not into any kind of waiting games, if I were you, I would have called him already. You're supposed to be spending the rest of your life with him, and you feel ashamed or nervous to call? If he will ever be your husband, you need to know that as mad as he could ever be at you, he is still there for you..this is just absurd. I would personally call him and just be like 'Ok, how long are we going to do this? Either we talk it out, or we decide this is not going to work.' Don't be afraid to be direct and say how you feel! And make sure he respects you-it doesn't sound like he does.

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THIS EXACTLY! I'D DROP HIS A$$ IN A HEARTBEAT

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Posted by Jsabbatino

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Posted by Kimberley2015

Sweetie don't ever be hard on yourself for loving someone. It shows that you have courage. Your text to him was more than appropriate and showed that you are a much bigger person than he is. I think what is happening now is his actions are speaking louder than words (not just from the argument the two of you had last week but him avoiding any communication with you whatsoever) Don't allow this situation to harden or heavy your heart because by doing that he wins. I think the more and more time that passes, the more and more you'll start opening your eyes and realize and come to terms with that you deserve more. You are still that strong, independent woman. Don't ever forget that!

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This!

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Exactly this!

Big fight

I totally agree. I posted before and have to say this after following your story for days. My heart breaks for you. I know you will be ok without this guy. i cannot believe how this man is treating you. my personal advice- when you are fully moved on....sell that damn ring and take a vacation on his account to get even....but in the mean time, do all you need to be strong and move forward and do whats best for you!!!! again, lots of hugs your way and we are all here! :)

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Posted by Jsabbatino

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Posted by Kimberley2015

Sweetie don't ever be hard on yourself for loving someone. It shows that you have courage. Your text to him was more than appropriate and showed that you are a much bigger person than he is. I think what is happening now is his actions are speaking louder than words (not just from the argument the two of you had last week but him avoiding any communication with you whatsoever) Don't allow this situation to harden or heavy your heart because by doing that he wins. I think the more and more time that passes, the more and more you'll start opening your eyes and realize and come to terms with that you deserve more. You are still that strong, independent woman. Don't ever forget that!

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This!

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yup

Big fight

I looked for this past and was thinking of you. Hope all is well. Have you and your FH worked anything out!? Hope your doing well! :)

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Posted by MissToMrs

I looked for this past and was thinking of you. Hope all is well. Have you and your FH worked anything out!? Hope your doing well! :)

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Same!!! I've been waiting for an update :(

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Posted by RSPan14

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Posted by MissToMrs

I looked for this past and was thinking of you. Hope all is well. Have you and your FH worked anything out!? Hope your doing well! :)

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Same!!! I've been waiting for an update :(

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Same-- hope all is well!

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I just came across and read this entire thread. I really feel for you. Please let us know if things have gotten any better.