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Cannot believe how cheap people can be...

Original post by bedda26

Last night we went to my BIL's 40th birthday party (DH's sister's husband) Now the party was at a Bar/Restaurant and there was a lot of good food. Now one of DH's brother could not make it but his wife came with her two little daughters (4 & 1 yrs. old) after the party DH and I went back to his sister's house and they were opening the envelopes and I hear DH's sister saying 'oh you gotta be kidding me'. Apparently they opened the card from the SIL who came alone with her two daughters and she put 41 dollars in the card!

Now I know this was not a wedding but come on, 41 dollars??? what was she thinking??? she was probably thinking that it's a 40th birthday so i'll give 40 plus one dollar for good luck. She could have done better since the birthday boy is Godfather to one of your daughters and is very generous to your daughter not just for her birthday but all throughout the year. I mean everytime he sees her he gives her 20 dollars. My MIL said 'the best part is that in the car she was was saying how she hoped she did the right thing'. I'm sorry but I don't think she did. Her card was the cheapest, everyone else including friends gave at least a 100 or more.

At least he got something...I got crap for my birthday and I'm godmother to her other daughter. We spoil our nieces and nephews. she couldn't go out and get me a little something and say 'from your goddaughter??? I am godmother to my best friend's son and she got a gift certificate for a manicure and pedicure with the card saying 'from your godson'. I'm not saying that I expect a lot of things, but just a little something, not even a fricking card I got from DH's SIL. Nothing! It just bugs me how we treat everyone so good and yet we get zilch in return from them. At least DH's sister and other brother get me and DH something for our birthdays and christmas and I'm not godmother to any of their children, and here my goddaughter's parents could not pick me up something. DH and I gave her daughter more for her 4th birthday than what they gave my BIL for his 40th.

I just think it was a very cheap thing to do. Sorry for the long post. Had to vent a little.
Kate Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...


Posted by palebride

You can't judge some people's 'cheapness' by others' generosity




oh boy just read this, and I agree with this also, hope it doesn't contradict my other post!

I don't think he should have gotten gifts at all. I wouldn't expect it for myself.
june262004 Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...

I don't get it. I don't think thats that bad of a gift. Not everyone is well off. When my aunt turned 50 I gave her a 60 dollar gift card I guess that was bad.


ETA: For the big milestone birthdays don't some people only give gag gifts? Thats only like 10 or 20 bucks.
FeliciaDA Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...


Posted by lilmrs

Here I will tell you what you only want to hear!




OMG, how wrong! I can't believe she did such a thing. How cheap can you be! Humpf! Some people.



don424 Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...

good stuff

MrsERod Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...


Posted by lilmrs

Here I will tell you what you only want to hear!




OMG, how wrong! I can't believe she did such a thing. How cheap can you be! Humpf! Some people.




too funny!!!!!
Preshy7 Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...

people give what they can afford. i am sure the kids didnt cost much to attend the party and she came on her own. any gift is fine. at least she even showed up lugging the two kids w/o her husbands help.

june262004 Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...


Posted by bedda26

Oh if you people only knew her.




I will be honest I did not read all 3 pages of this thread but This is sometimes the problem with posting personal issues on a public forum.

Did anyone already say this?
Janice Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...

I feel like if I want my b-day party in a restaurant then I better save and be prepared to host family and friends at the restaurant. I get aggravated with topics like this. It was his idea to have it in a restaurant..you invited me and I am your guest...I am tired of buying my plate at these invited parties..If a party is hosted in someone's home are they expected to give less since it is less of a party? A party is a party..covering plates takes all the fun out of a party if you ask me

june262004 Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...


Posted by Janice

I feel like if I want my b-day party in a restaurant then I better save and be prepared to host family and friends at the restaurant. I get aggravated with topics like this. It was his idea to have it in a restaurant..you invited me and I am your guest...I am tired of buying my plate at these invited parties..If a party is hosted in someone's home are they expected to give less since it is less of a party? A party is a party..covering plates takes all the fun out of a party if you ask me




MrsJ Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...

Since it's such an offensive gift to you, why don't you give back the $41?

marymoon Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...

Ok..listen to THIS..

My brother in law (sisters husband)'s brother was his Best Man at their wedding (I was MOH). he has 4 kids, one kid was invited with a date, the other kid broguth a date withut even responding for her, so it was an unexpected extra person..so they had 8 people in all. EIGHT people. And he was the BEST MAN and his YOUNGER BROTHER'S wedding..

They gave..... *drumroll*

230!
marymoon Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...

I think giving an adult $$ is awkward. When my godfather celebrated his 40th birthday, i gave him a framed 5X7 of us together and a nice card. he always gives me $100-200 for my birthday..but he's a LOT older than i am, and I know he doesn't want my $$. I think my parents (his aunt and uncle) maye have given him $100 and put my name on it. it didn' t cover all of our palted at the dinner, probably. but that's not the point.

nylibride Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...


Posted by dpli

I also have to disagree. Your SIL may be very cheap and is out of line to tell other people what to buy her kids for birthdays. You have to be the judge of that since we don't know her. However, in my opinion, if an adult is having a birthday party, it should be to celebrate the occasion. If they are having it at a nice restaurant, it should be because they can afford it and want to enjoy it with their guests, not because they expect to get more expensive gifts.



Well said. I definitely agree, whatever the occasion, that if you invite someone as a guest it is because you wanted them there to celebrate. I can't wrap my brain around anyone expecting someone to 'cover their' plate at something they were invited to. I definitely would never expect this of any of my guests when I have invited them to an event I am giving.
SandraLynn Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...

I don't think there is anything wrong w/ $41...When I turned (cough cough) 40, I had my party at a restaurant and some folks gave me gifts of $25 or $40, I wasn't looking for a gift, I was looking for all my friends to share the evening w/ me, the gifts were a perk. 'Priorities'. I didn't send cards or gifts to my 2 brother in laws this year b/c we are broke, if they get all twisted over it, oh well, I think it really depends on what your priorities are in life, and gifts, well, that is not mine- and one should be grateful they even received a gift.

Butterflybride Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...


Posted by SandraLynn

I don't think there is anything wrong w/ $41...When I turned (cough cough) 40, I had my party at a restaurant and some folks gave me gifts of $25 or $40, I wasn't looking for a gift, I was looking for all my friends to share the evening w/ me, the gifts were a perk. 'Priorities'. I didn't send cards or gifts to my 2 brother in laws this year b/c we are broke, if they get all twisted over it, oh well, I think it really depends on what your priorities are in life, and gifts, well, that is not mine- and one should be grateful they even received a gift.



I agree with this. It's more important that she was thoughtful enough to attend and generous enough to give a gift, regardless of what the gift was. People put way too much importance on material things.
dcwife Posted:

Re: Cannot believe how cheap people can be...

I don't understand is why people make it sound like it doesn't cost anything to have a party in a house. Why is there a distinction between having a party in a restaurant or a house? If I had a party at my house I would still have to pay for food and drink.

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