Catholic Girls- Are you having a full mass?

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Posted by angl2001

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Posted by Soon2beAlberti

sorry to beat a dead horse but i just got home from work and read the responses.

honestly...i don't give a flying rats arse about my guests religious sentiments when it comes to my full mass. I will have my full mass and anyone who doesn't want to come can stay home. I don't care if its just me and FH and the priest in there. but it's about recieving an important sacrament .

and about the not wanting a full mass because of issues with the church I see that some people took that personally but can I ask you a question. Isn't that a personal problem with the POLITICS of the church and religion rather than a problem with god himself or the sacrament? so I don't understand what one has to do with the other.

and about sex before marriage but still going to chirch as opposed to getting married in a church under a religion you don't particularly 100% care for...I am a sinner, we all are...in fact the church aknowledges the fact that we are all sinners and expects us to fall. but its about us acknowledging these sins and doing our best to correct them or prevent them in the future. I can't change the fact that I lost my virginity before FH...I'll never get that back. I do believe that god will forgive me for continuing to have sex before marriage because the sex I am having is not promiscuous or purely based on lust. I feel Joseph was a gift from god and I love him. I've had conversations with god and explained to him that the only reason Joseph and I are not married yet is because of not having the $ to get married and do it the way we feel is right. I don't think god would fault us for that. at least not if he's the god I believe him to be.

I just feel like the church ceremony IS the celebration...it's the reason for the entire day. I personally feel too many people pay so much focus to everything else...reception, making sure your guests are happy and comfortable and not bored, they turn the reception into this big to do and the ceremony itself gets lost in the shuffle like it's something that should just be done with.

and for people who don't believe in god or anything at all to get married in church...thats the most hypocritical of all. That I just don't get ...at all. It's like you have a strong enough belief in nothing to say ur agnostic but you don't care enough about ur stance to not get married in a church?!?! if ur gonna stand for something stand for it...own it.

::OFF OF SOAP BOX::

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wow!!!!! isnt part of being catholic also not to judge people????

you have your belifes and others have their own and honestly if it cames down to either getting married in a church to save my FHs relationship with his family or to not get married in a church then...the church it is ..........also my mother has brain damage and can not sit that long i would never put her thu that!!!!! Im sorry but your rant there was a little harsh to me! and i am taking it towards me because i was the only person that mentioned being agnostic.I also know people who are very religious but dont WANT a full mass either?? what do you say to them?? are they horrible people because they dont want to sit there for an hour and a half?? please. I myself do not belive in the catholic religion, or any religion for that matter, thats how i feel. I do not belive in the whole 'god' thing i belivee that there is some kind of higher power and a place we go when we die. I believe in spirits and ghosts and afterlife. I do not belive ethat there is 1 person to answer to and 1 place EVERYONE goes to when they die!! Thats MY belief I dont judge anyone who loves their religion i RESPECT it. As should you!

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I just wanted to say that I TOTALLY agree with you...you point of view, as well as your ideology...
and from the 'heathen' contingent...I admit, I skip out on the ceremony if it's going to be a full mass, unless it's someone I'm REALLY close to...I just can't sit in church for that long...It makes me crazy. But, that's because I have a dreadfully bad attitude about organized religion in general, and the catholic faith in particular, since it's what I was raised, and therefore the religion with which I'm most familiar. I made my communion, penance, my confirmation, and all that. And, now, when for whatever reason, wedding, funeral, christening, I do have to sit through a mass, I never take communion, because I don't believe in it, and I'm not about to mock anyone else by accepting it. But, my feelings toward the church notwithstanding, I think everyone should do what they really feel is right, just don't always expect people to agree with you.
We're getting married at the RH, because we believe that our relationship on a spiritual level, is already committed, and the wedding ceremony is to legally bind us as a family unit. The wedding, for us, is about throwing the biggest party we'll ever throw, for the people we love.

Wow -- I can't believe this thread is still going on.

See how powerful (no matter what your belief or nonbelief is) religion is. Has this thread going for days!

[wait, you cant have a full mass if your fh is not catholic? Ugh i didnt know that, im not catholic but FH is, i wanted to have a full mass

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Espo not sure if this was ever cleared up for you or not but you can have a mass if you are not Catholic. Your FH may have to sign something saying you will raise your children Catholic. This is what we were told by our priest -- so I would just double check with yours.

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Posted by anneandchris

[wait, you cant have a full mass if your fh is not catholic? Ugh i didnt know that, im not catholic but FH is, i wanted to have a full mass

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Espo not sure if this was ever cleared up for you or not but you can have a mass if you are not Catholic. Your FH may have to sign something saying you will raise your children Catholic. This is what we were told by our priest -- so I would just double check with yours.

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Yes thank you it was answered...i mean i was 99% sure we were able to lol but it just scared me for a sec like wait was i wrong...the only thing is that i cant receive communion which is fine with me, i have no problem with that

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Posted by Espo22

WOW i just read most of the thread now, didnt realize i posted in such a controversial thread

so i wonder, am i wrong for being a non-catholic and getting married in a catholic church? is that viewed as doing the wrong thing?

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Not in my opinion, not that that counts for anything! But seriously, no.

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it does count lol...just wondering because i saw posts about if you're not religious you shouldnt get married in the catholic church and so on. I will be the first to admit that i have some issues with organized religion, alot of it stems with how the church began and what it was based upon...i also dont see why so many people let religion divide us, i mean last i checked we were all created by the same god so the need for different religions i dont get then lol. Plus i believe that what matters is having a belief in something and having faith in god not necessarily having to follow a specific religion. I know people who go to church all the time and are so religious but all i think is how hypocritical they are, they are such judgemental and hateful people which i dont understand. I mean its said that were all sinners and yes the church acknowledges so if the church acknowledges this and is understanding of this then why arent other religious people? im thinking of specific people in my life and not anyone on the boards since i dont know people personally to judge for myself.

Also doesn't it say in the bible that only god can judge us, and isn't also a sin to act godlike so by judging isn't that what people are doing?

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this is my favorite response...I'm with you!!

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Posted by Kris109

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Posted by Espo22

WOW i just read most of the thread now, didnt realize i posted in such a controversial thread

so i wonder, am i wrong for being a non-catholic and getting married in a catholic church? is that viewed as doing the wrong thing?

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Not in my opinion, not that that counts for anything! But seriously, no.

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it does count lol...just wondering because i saw posts about if you're not religious you shouldnt get married in the catholic church and so on. I will be the first to admit that i have some issues with organized religion, alot of it stems with how the church began and what it was based upon...i also dont see why so many people let religion divide us, i mean last i checked we were all created by the same god so the need for different religions i dont get then lol. Plus i believe that what matters is having a belief in something and having faith in god not necessarily having to follow a specific religion. I know people who go to church all the time and are so religious but all i think is how hypocritical they are, they are such judgemental and hateful people which i dont understand. I mean its said that were all sinners and yes the church acknowledges so if the church acknowledges this and is understanding of this then why arent other religious people? im thinking of specific people in my life and not anyone on the boards since i dont know people personally to judge for myself.

Also doesn't it say in the bible that only god can judge us, and isn't also a sin to act godlike so by judging isn't that what people are doing?

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this is my favorite response...I'm with you!!

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Posted by Kris109

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Posted by Espo22

WOW i just read most of the thread now, didnt realize i posted in such a controversial thread

so i wonder, am i wrong for being a non-catholic and getting married in a catholic church? is that viewed as doing the wrong thing?

---

Not in my opinion, not that that counts for anything! But seriously, no.

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it does count lol...just wondering because i saw posts about if you're not religious you shouldnt get married in the catholic church and so on. I will be the first to admit that i have some issues with organized religion, alot of it stems with how the church began and what it was based upon...i also dont see why so many people let religion divide us, i mean last i checked we were all created by the same god so the need for different religions i dont get then lol. Plus i believe that what matters is having a belief in something and having faith in god not necessarily having to follow a specific religion. I know people who go to church all the time and are so religious but all i think is how hypocritical they are, they are such judgemental and hateful people which i dont understand. I mean its said that were all sinners and yes the church acknowledges so if the church acknowledges this and is understanding of this then why arent other religious people? im thinking of specific people in my life and not anyone on the boards since i dont know people personally to judge for myself.

Also doesn't it say in the bible that only god can judge us, and isn't also a sin to act godlike so by judging isn't that what people are doing?

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this is my favorite response...I'm with you!!

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why thank you lol, im usually met with arguements when i make such statements hahaha

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Posted by angl2001

you and me both lol

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i find it funny bc most ppl who argue with me about this are hypocrites, not all but most

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by angl2001

you and me both lol

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i find it funny bc most ppl who argue with me about this are hypocrites, not all but most

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I just LOVE when people preach religion and you know damn well what they are really like. I think they are so argumentative because they are trying to convince themselves they are good Catholic/Christian/Jewish/insert religion of your choice people

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by anneandchris

[wait, you cant have a full mass if your fh is not catholic? Ugh i didnt know that, im not catholic but FH is, i wanted to have a full mass

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Espo not sure if this was ever cleared up for you or not but you can have a mass if you are not Catholic. Your FH may have to sign something saying you will raise your children Catholic. This is what we were told by our priest -- so I would just double check with yours.

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Yes thank you it was answered...i mean i was 99% sure we were able to lol but it just scared me for a sec like wait was i wrong...the only thing is that i cant receive communion which is fine with me, i have no problem with that

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Glad it was cleared up! We didn't know this until we met with the priest and FH had already enrolled in RCIA. I think he would have done the classes regardless but it is just nice to know he isn't being 'forced.'

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Posted by kkss1419

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by angl2001

you and me both lol

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i find it funny bc most ppl who argue with me about this are hypocrites, not all but most

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I just LOVE when people preach religion and you know damn well what they are really like. I think they are so argumentative because they are trying to convince themselves they are good Catholic/Christian/Jewish/insert religion of your choice people

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you are my new online BFF lol

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by Kris109

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Posted by Espo22

WOW i just read most of the thread now, didnt realize i posted in such a controversial thread

so i wonder, am i wrong for being a non-catholic and getting married in a catholic church? is that viewed as doing the wrong thing?

---

Not in my opinion, not that that counts for anything! But seriously, no.

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it does count lol...just wondering because i saw posts about if you're not religious you shouldnt get married in the catholic church and so on. I will be the first to admit that i have some issues with organized religion, alot of it stems with how the church began and what it was based upon...i also dont see why so many people let religion divide us, i mean last i checked we were all created by the same god so the need for different religions i dont get then lol. Plus i believe that what matters is having a belief in something and having faith in god not necessarily having to follow a specific religion. I know people who go to church all the time and are so religious but all i think is how hypocritical they are, they are such judgemental and hateful people which i dont understand. I mean its said that were all sinners and yes the church acknowledges so if the church acknowledges this and is understanding of this then why arent other religious people? im thinking of specific people in my life and not anyone on the boards since i dont know people personally to judge for myself.

Also doesn't it say in the bible that only god can judge us, and isn't also a sin to act godlike so by judging isn't that what people are doing?

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this is my favorite response...I'm with you!!

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why thank you lol, im usually met with arguements when i make such statements hahaha

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Yea I was waiting for the one on her soapbaox to respond to you Espo, she has a pretty strong opinion about non practicing catholics getting married in a church

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Posted by anneandchris

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by anneandchris

[wait, you cant have a full mass if your fh is not catholic? Ugh i didnt know that, im not catholic but FH is, i wanted to have a full mass

---

Espo not sure if this was ever cleared up for you or not but you can have a mass if you are not Catholic. Your FH may have to sign something saying you will raise your children Catholic. This is what we were told by our priest -- so I would just double check with yours.

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Yes thank you it was answered...i mean i was 99% sure we were able to lol but it just scared me for a sec like wait was i wrong...the only thing is that i cant receive communion which is fine with me, i have no problem with that

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Glad it was cleared up! We didn't know this until we met with the priest and FH had already enrolled in RCIA. I think he would have done the classes regardless but it is just nice to know he isn't being 'forced.'

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OH SEE i wouldn't have done the classes lol

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Posted by sassygirl9

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by Kris109

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Posted by Espo22

WOW i just read most of the thread now, didnt realize i posted in such a controversial thread

so i wonder, am i wrong for being a non-catholic and getting married in a catholic church? is that viewed as doing the wrong thing?

---

Not in my opinion, not that that counts for anything! But seriously, no.

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it does count lol...just wondering because i saw posts about if you're not religious you shouldnt get married in the catholic church and so on. I will be the first to admit that i have some issues with organized religion, alot of it stems with how the church began and what it was based upon...i also dont see why so many people let religion divide us, i mean last i checked we were all created by the same god so the need for different religions i dont get then lol. Plus i believe that what matters is having a belief in something and having faith in god not necessarily having to follow a specific religion. I know people who go to church all the time and are so religious but all i think is how hypocritical they are, they are such judgemental and hateful people which i dont understand. I mean its said that were all sinners and yes the church acknowledges so if the church acknowledges this and is understanding of this then why arent other religious people? im thinking of specific people in my life and not anyone on the boards since i dont know people personally to judge for myself.

Also doesn't it say in the bible that only god can judge us, and isn't also a sin to act godlike so by judging isn't that what people are doing?

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this is my favorite response...I'm with you!!

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why thank you lol, im usually met with arguements when i make such statements hahaha

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Yea I was waiting for the one on her soapbaox to respond to you Espo, she has a pretty strong opinion about non practicing catholics getting married in a church

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oh this wasnt towards just her but anybody who felt that way, i have nothing against her personally...i saw a couple of ppl who felt that if youre not religious you shouldn't get married in the church...and btw im not catholic

I'm jewish and FH is a very unreligious methodist so we will not be having a mass (obviously). I've never been to a wedding that had mass, so I'm just curious....

How long does it last? What exactly is it? Some posts made it sound like an extra 10 minutes, some made it sound like it's very very long.

To the original poster (from the POV of an impartial non-Catholic who won't think you are going to hell for skipping out on mass) -- if it's something your FH really wants badly you need to weigh how important it is to him, and how much you are against it. ISame as any other wedding compromise. If you are going to be uncomfortable with mass, are there things you can do in advance to make yourself more comfortable? Is this something you might regret not doing down the road? Can you incorporate some things and not others?

While FH and I are not getting married in a temple or a church out of compromise, we are being married by a rabbi. We were originally considering a rabbi AND priest, but in the end FH decided that since he wasn't that religious it wasn't that important to him to have a priest, while my family and I greatly preferred just having a rabbi. We are going to have minimal hebrew so he and his family are not uncomfortable. I would have liked to be married in a temple, but it's not worth making him and his family feel uncomfortable.

I know religion makes people crazy but it's really just one more thing you will have to compromise on, or sacrifice in order to make the other happy. As for what you decide, it's really just up to the 2 of you. Good luck, I realize it can be a tough decision.

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Posted by Mimacat

I cannot believe this topic is still going on.

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i have been on this board for about 75 years and seriously this HAS to be at LEAST the 15th time this debate has raged on and surprisingly. . .no resolution yet

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Posted by ant n tilde

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Posted by Mimacat

I cannot believe this topic is still going on.

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i have been on this board for about 75 years and seriously this HAS to be at LEAST the 15th time this debate has raged on and surprisingly. . .no resolution yet

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So are you implying there will be no solution? Do you think this also means that there will never be peace in the middle east and we'll never figure out of the chicken or egg came first!?!?!