Dear...

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Posted by Snowflake08

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Posted by katleigh3

Dear bride who bought the american flag wedding dress,

You may seriously want to reconsider.



signed,
patriotic bride, but thats a little much

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lol

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ok did someone actually buy it??!!??!?!

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Posted by kzecha

THis may be a little insensitive, but to those of you who take the LIRR everyday, you would understand

Dear those of you who committ suicide by jumping in front of a train:

while I have sympathy for you and feel bad you felt the need to kill yourself, but do you need to do it -on a Friday night peak rush-hour train that strands me an hour away from my house?

LIRR commuter

p.s. - I really am not that insensitive, but this happens ALL THE TIME!

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ummm im right there with you thinking the SAME thing.. not LIRR but MTA subways...

dear sucide thinkier....
please find another way to kill youself that does not involve publice transportation!

thank you.
A train commuter.

Dear Digusting People at work...

Granted the weather is changing and you have a cold. Could you please cover your !@#&^#* mouth when you sneeze or cough??? You sneezed straight into the air nice and loud and just sprayed everyone/everything within a ten mile radius. I dont want your SARS/ebola/e-coli/tuberculosis/Avian bird flu. Didnt your mother teach you to cover your mouth?!?!?

-signed, I dont need your sickness.

Dental hygiene is a very good thing to practice. But really, do I need to walk into the bathroom and see you brushing your teeth and gargling and spitting in the sink where I was about to wash my hands?!?!

-signed...spit it in the toilet idiot!

dear fh,

even though i complain that i never see youu.. thanks for fixing my moms entire basement, sheet rock, shelving unit, new windows and doors on your day off..
your the best!

love
me

theres a positive one..

the vent..

dear ____________

stop sending me emails wanting my advice and ideas, when you never ever use it... its a waste of my time because i actually have the ability to do nice things for others... and take the time to research and look around!!
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

love,
a pissssseddd offf lady!!

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Posted by Spelldizzy

Dear Digusting People at work...

Granted the weather is changing and you have a cold. Could you please cover your !@#&^#* mouth when you sneeze or cough??? You sneezed straight into the air nice and loud and just sprayed everyone/everything within a ten mile radius. I dont want your SARS/ebola/e-coli/tuberculosis/Avian bird flu. Didnt your mother teach you to cover your mouth?!?!?

-signed, I dont need your sickness.

Dental hygiene is a very good thing to practice. But really, do I need to walk into the bathroom and see you brushing your teeth and gargling and spitting in the sink where I was about to wash my hands?!?!

-signed...spit it in the toilet idiot!

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Dear Everyone Who thinks my wedding is so far away and that I have soooooooo much time,

THEN YOU PLAN IT AND LET ME KNOW HOW MUCH TIME YOU REALLY HAVE
A S S H O L E!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


With love always & forever,
The Blushing Bride

Dear Kindergarteners,

I was out of your school for a whole month and so I was unable to build up a better immunity to your germs.
Please do not stick your fingers in your nose and/or your mouth and then ask me to hold your hand. Please blow your nose before you come to school so that you get all the crusty stuff out and it doesnt shoot out at me when you laugh. Please do not ask me to tie your shoe or help you write a word and then caugh in my face. And please please please tell mommy and daddy that you threw up in the morning so that they let you stay home!!!!
While you all are very cute and sweet...I DO like my voice and wish I could get it back after having been sick for the last three days...and I also wish I could remove the tissue that has been permanently attached to my nose.

Thank you very much and I hope you enjoy your weekend!!!!

Signed,
Your very snotty and froggy sounding TA

Dear Lady who's kids I babysit-

Please tell your 5 year olds that it's not ok to sh!t on the floor. They don't do it in school, they definitely don't need to do it at home. I know that you love to spoil them, but everytime you're around, they suddenly forget that they're potty trained.

I also never want to hear from one of them again that they are tired of wiping themselves.

Love Your Babyshitter Picker Upper

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Posted by Fall Bride 2008

Dear Everyone Who thinks my wedding is so far away and that I have soooooooo much time,

THEN YOU PLAN IT AND LET ME KNOW HOW MUCH TIME YOU REALLY HAVE
A S S H O L E!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


With love always & forever,
The Blushing Bride

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Dear the same people....what she said!!!

signed...ME

I get so sick of people saying 'Oh you have so much time why are you doing that now?' ::Picks up a brick and throws it::

This one is a little over due but STILL bothering me...

Dear man who just had shoulder surgery and his wife...

WHY ARE YOU TAKING THE LIRR HOME FROM JUST HAVING SURGERY DURING RUSH HOUR?? Do you enjoy pain?! Sir, you don't look well, I'm sure those meds are starting to make your stomach feel pretty shiiitty. As you start to burp and make me only assume your about to blow chunks, I'm going to get my asss over to the next car despite the hordes of people standing in the aisle that are blocking my way. Oh yeah and THANKS for getting me all worked up on my way home, THANKS!!

Sincerely,
Afraid of puke, so stand somewhere else!

PS... to his wife... you must REALLY hate your husband to think that this is the best mode of transportation for your husband who's shoulder was just sliced open only hours ago!

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Posted by Spelldizzy


Dental hygiene is a very good thing to practice. But really, do I need to walk into the bathroom and see you brushing your teeth and gargling and spitting in the sink where I was about to wash my hands?!?!

-signed...spit it in the toilet idiot!

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omg i thought i was the only one - i dont know why . . . it doesnt even really make sense - but when i see people brushing their teeth at work i actually gag. like they put the tooth brush down on the bathroom sink!! and then put it in their mouths. and then just spitting in the sink too - OMG i cant even think about it!!

Dear Smelly Supervisor Lady:

I am sorry that you apparently have some kind of health issue. BUT I do not think it is fair that I have to attempt to hold my breath every time I have a question to ask you. Sometimes, I literally get light headed and if I ever fall on you I will have to burn off all my clothing and possibly a layer of skin.

And YES even though you have been working here longer than I have been alive - you DO make mistakes and in a few cases I am right and you are wrong - so DEAL WITH IT.

Many people have warned me that you will make me cry one day - but until that day, I WILL point out your mistakes if they make ME look bad.

Thanks,
Cranky NON SMELLY coworker

Dear other co worker,

Yes, farting IS a natural body function but it is NOT okay to do so at work. I don't care if you 'do it all the time and no one has a problem with it.' I DO!!!!!! And I seriously hope that ring on your finger is NOT a wedding band, because what sicko would marry you?

Thanks a bunch!
Coworker about to lose it.

Dear FGrandMIL,

If you watch CNN all day you will see a lot of horrible things. Why don't you turn it off instead of sitting there, watching it, and making yourself cry all day? I am sorry that you are sad - but your GRANDCHILDREN are here and your GREAT GRANDCHILDREN - so instead of a pity party - why not enjoy the people who are ACTUALLY here instead of worrying about that 'poor Anna Nicole Smith- what a shame.'

Sincerely,
I am not going to feel bad for you anymore - not matter how much you want me to!

Dear Clock,

Why do you have to move so slow when I'm stuck at work on a beautiful Saturday???

Sincerely,
a VERY bored and wish I was home, employee.

Dear Ms. Future Divorcee

Maybe no one cares about your relationship because they know that he doesn't love you and it is never going to last. If he treats you like pure crap now... it's not going to change if you suddenly decide to get married. Marrying him isn't going to magically make him love you. He doesn't love you now and he isn't going to love you then. He's just trying to keep his booty call (aka: you) from breaking up with him. Cause even though you think he is so sexy and all other women want him... you are the only one! That's why you break up for 2 weeks at a time and then he comes back. Not because he realized he can't live without you idiot... but he hasn't had sex in 2 weeks and he knows you'll forgive him and give it up in a second. He couldn't get someone else if he paid them. It's funny that the ring he got you was only $300 and you think it's worth a damn fortune (lmao). Get over it and stop asking me if I would be happy for you if you get married to him. Oh and stop acting like you are happy for me... cause I know your jealousy is killing you inside.

Talk to you soon!

Sincerely,
Ms. Don't want to burst your bubble

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Posted by failurebydsign

dear period,

why do you hurt my tummy so

love,
my body

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ditto!

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Posted by Spelldizzy

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Posted by Fall Bride 2008

Dear Everyone Who thinks my wedding is so far away and that I have soooooooo much time,

THEN YOU PLAN IT AND LET ME KNOW HOW MUCH TIME YOU REALLY HAVE
A S S H O L E!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


With love always & forever,
The Blushing Bride

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Dear the same people....what she said!!!

signed...ME

I get so sick of people saying 'Oh you have so much time why are you doing that now?' ::Picks up a brick and throws it::

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Don't get me started. I have heard that from just about everybody. Meanwhile, vendors I wanted are already booked! I guess everyone wants me to wait to the last min so I am stuck with having no flowers or limos or photography. I think I'll kill the next person that says it to me.

dear homework,

no.

hearts,
me

Dear Gym,

Maybe if you were a little closer to my house, and a little less work, and a little less time-consuming, I would go to you. Since it's all YOUR fault that I don't go, stop making me feel so guilty about it.

Thanks,
Couch Potato

Dear woman who feels it's necessary to hold a conversation on a cell phone while taking a whiz in a bathroom stall at work,


HANG UP! No conversation can be THAT important!


Sincerely,

co-worker who also must use the bathroom but doesn't feel the need to call someone while relieving themselves.