If so what was the reason. Also was it still perfect (special) as if it was the first on the actual wedding day?
The reason for my question is I just found out my only grandmother has 3 months to live. She was a very healthy person and this was very unexpected. We are now flying down to Fl to get married in a private ceremony for her. We got engaged near the end of January so we are going to get married that day. I was just wondering am I taking away from my wedding in July?? It is very emoitional. Thank you for your advise in advance.
lovetolove
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
I think its very sweet what you are doing for your grandmother. Your special day will still be special, atleast this way your grandmother gets to see you get married and you wont have any regrets that day about not having her by your side. I just think its so nice that you are doing this..:)
MJDoc12
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
i don't think it would make your day any less special if you decided to get married for your grandmother. friends of mine got married a few months before their wedding, but i don't exactly remember the reason. either way, when they were wed in the church and had the reception and such...it still had a huge meaning for them. they were able to share it with their family and friends
good luck with your choice!!!
Ser29
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
I think its wonderful what you are doing and I would def do it if I were in your situation.. me and FH have already agreed that if either of our grandparents are in that situation we would do the same and then still keep our big day... it won't take anything away from it I don't think.
lipglossjunky73
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
The reason sounds like everything will be extra special.... I would do the same for my grandma if she was sick!!!
ETA: We think abt going to Vegas just for fun and getting married before the big day....
070306
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
Thanks ladies. It was my decision to do this and now that we are starting to plan this I feel very unsure. I think it is just biitersweet. I know the reason I am doing this and it is very sad. She is the only grandparent I have...
We decided we are not telling anyone, just a few people. ( now all liweddings) We will only were our wedding bands that weekend. I am still keeping my name until July. The only thing we are doing is he is going on my health insurance. FH pays for his. I got a cute pale pink dress to wear.
Thanks for all your positve thoughts.
werock0709
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
Lots of luck to you!! Your making the right choice.
Swan06
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
I'm here for you! I have faith that everything will work out!!!
drtrish03
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
We are actually married already, and noone in my family knows this. It was a personal decision for my 'husband' (still sounds weird) and myself. We did it for a reason. It absolutely, in no way whatsoever, is or will take away from our 'Wedding Day' in April. For us, this is our actual wedding day!
I don't think I could every imagine a reason better than yours to get married before the 'official' day. You sound like wonderful granddaughter and your grandmother is very lucky to have you, as you are of her. Don't worry. They will both be very special days for you for different reasons!
Good luck! Your grandmother is in my prayers
SummerBride06
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
i think this is such a wonderful idea. how does your grandma feel about it? if she doesn't support the idea, you may want to rethink it. however, if she is overjoyed, then you have your answer right there.
on a side note...my grandpa was diagnosed with lung cancer last march. they gave him until august to live. we got engaged in april and had our engagement party immediately, because we wanted to make sure he was there. he wound up living until december 16, 4 months longer than the doctors said! so maybe there is still hope that your grandma can make your 'real' wedding. i don't know her circumstances, but maybe that chance is still there.
best of luck with both of your weddings!
Aga
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
we were married for 5 years before we had an actual church wedding and reception... it didnt take away from how special our day was for us and our families...
Noiva06
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
I am getting married before my big day(s)... LOL
This is truly a long story for me, but to keep it short it is something we MUST do to have the weddings we planned. I am getting married here on 5/21 with an 'civil' ceremony and reception and then getting married in Portugal on 5/27 with church and reception... Due to paperwork reasons and mostly due to the Catholic church in Portugal we are actually getting married very soon, possibly this upcoming weekend ( )! We are getting excited, but trying not to because we are trying to look at it as something we have to do to fulfill the wedding plans and days we envisioned. Most of our families know and so do a few friends but our reasons for doing it are completely understandable... I don't think our actual wedding days are going to feel any less special but it is something we have thought about.
Your reason is the most perfect example as to why someone would marry before the big day. I think it's a wonderful decision to share this important day with your grandmother and don't worry, your wedding day will still be truly special. Best of Luck and let me know how it turns out!
EJSD2006
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
I think it's a wonderful thing that you are doing and I don't think it will take away from your July wedding at all.
My cousin got married in a civil ceremony a few months before their 'big' wedding because his fiancee found out she was expecting. No one freaked out or anything b/c they weren't married yet, it was only a matter of time before they had kids, they just decided sooner rather than later. And their big day was just as special. The bride had worked hard to lose the baby weight and looked gorgeous. No one thought any less of them for getting married beforehand. And considering your circumstances, I definitely don't think it will take any specialness away.
tbtmickey
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
My brother and sister-in-law got married on Long Island in April, it was a small ceremony with only our immediate family. And then had their big wedding in July in England, and the one in July was BEAUTIFUL...and just as meaningful. They had to get married in the States first because she was English and the US required it. So there are many reasons for getting married before the big wedding, but don't worry, it won't take away from it. If I had known my grandmother wouldn't be here before the wedding I would have done it in a heartbeat!
Kosta's Kitty
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
My DH and I were married a year before our wedding. Only our parents and siblings were aware of it. Our wedding day was more special than our first one in vegas because all our friends and family were around. I don't think anything was taken away from our big day. Best of Luck to you.
070306
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
Thank you all for responding. You made me feel alot better.
As to some of the questions. When my grandma found out the thursday before New Years Eve that she had three months to live. She was devasted that she was going to miss my (our) wedding. The feeling was mutual. I went to FH on New Years Eve to go and get married in front of my grandma and he thought it was a great idea. I just called my grandmother on Friday to tell her the news. She still hasn't stopped crying. Even if she makes it to July there is no way she can travel, either way she will not be at the wedding.
I know lots of people get married before the big day. I am just very emotional with all of this. I guess it is the reason behind it.
To the brides that have done this already, Thank you for sharing. Best of luck to you and your FH or husband on the big wedding day.
N.Y.bride
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Re: Did anyone marry before there big wedding
I did because we wanted a family member who is a minister in NJ to marry us here in NY. It would not have been legal so we went to the court house a few days before and believe it or not it was VERY romantic!