divorce mediator tonight- updated on bottom....

Original post by kdelace

Oct 12, 2004 03:59 PM

well tonights our first meeting with a mediator- 7:30..go figure im going to miss part of the yankee game!!
all kidding aside,im nervous and upset but not like I was... each day gets a tiny bit better..
my husband is feeling it though. I dontthink the magnitude of this has truly hit him. hes called me three times today...

I honestly don't hate him. i dont talk about him in a bad way or put him down. go figure maturity at 31.. It comes in handy.. I'm upset but i know he has a problem and its not me i cant change him.

like my counselor said.. when you meet girls and girls become your friend. if they dont fit your personality do you try to change them? no you just dont hang out with them or they are not one of your closest friends..

why with guys do many women (not all im not stereotyping) find a guy and try to change them to fit their needs?

she said I should to start looking for someone thats compatible to me and not someone I can try change and mold to fit my needs.

anyway, wish me luck,i am going to need it tonight!!!

it made sense!!!

mrswask Posted: Oct 12, 2004 05:16 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Best of Luck Kristi!!

TracyInQueens Posted: Oct 12, 2004 05:21 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Wow, if what your counselor said had occured to me sooner I would have saved myself a lot of grief in my 20s! But those are wise words and very true.

I wish you lots of luck tonight. You'll be fine.

Jax430 Posted: Oct 12, 2004 05:27 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Good luck tonight Kristi!!

butterfly20 Posted: Oct 12, 2004 06:17 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

good luck

swags1016 Posted: Oct 12, 2004 06:44 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Good luck Kristi

btrflygrl Posted: Oct 12, 2004 07:23 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Best of Luck Kristi and Keep up that faith and hope!!

Maribelle7777 Posted: Oct 12, 2004 07:43 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Best of luck

OSCARtheGROOM Posted: Oct 12, 2004 07:43 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Best of Luck, and let us know the outcome.

lbf404 Posted: Oct 12, 2004 07:59 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Good luck!

soon2bmrs2004 Posted: Oct 12, 2004 08:08 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Good Luck!!!!!!!!

allure Posted: Oct 12, 2004 08:22 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Good Luck

november12003 Posted: Oct 12, 2004 10:14 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Good luck, hope it went ok

BriBri529 Posted: Oct 12, 2004 10:32 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

good luck

Moehick Posted: Oct 12, 2004 10:33 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Good luck and keep up your strength!

marymoon Posted: Oct 12, 2004 10:41 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

Good Luck! You sound like you're really on the right track. That girlfriends thing is REALLY good advice. I hope it went well

MrsTC Posted: Oct 12, 2004 11:04 PM

Re: divorce mediator tongiht- wish me luck..

good luck

kdelace Posted: Oct 13, 2004 05:35 PM

Re: divorce mediator tonight- updated on bottom....

we went last night- the mediator was very nice- he actually is a divorce attorney and decided to mdeiate because many couples can divorce without lawyers if you come to agreements.

We sat there in silence. We couldnt even look each other. Not in a disgusted way but in a sad way.

The meeting was a get to know you meeting. he took our information down- what was to be divided- cc, bank $$ etc...

He said to talk and think about which way we want to approach it- separate legally, divorce no fault- takes a year or divorce with a fault-

He said to call him in a few days and let him know if we want his services. the meeting last night didnt cost anything and he gave us a copy of his book for free which had useful info in there.
mediation is a lot cheaper than retaining a lawyer and going to court- they write up the legal papers and file...
it was just sad. when the meeting was over he walked out one way and I walked out another.
I cried a little and then went to COld Stone an d loaded up on ice cream. then i went home and watched the Yankee game. they stressed me out also!!

he called me this morning. I know hes confused and upset and doesnt want to go back to the way things were. i dont either!!! but I am standing my ground. If he came to me and said I love you enough to get help for myself and then work on us I would be so happy and be willing to do that. but that hasnt happened...

oh well.. the saga continues...