Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

Kathy116 Posted: Nov 05, 2003 11:33 AM

Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

Our wedding starts at 5:30pm and ends at 11:00pm. FI and I decided in January that NO CHILDREN were invited, we wanted this to be an adult wedding, and a nice night out for people with children. The only 'kids' that will be there are teenagers...16, 17 yrs old.

NOW...this morning, FI starts in with me that he always imagined children at his wedding!!!!!!!! WTF!!!!!!!!!! INVITATIONS went out 3 weeks ago and now he pulls this?

Well, turns out FI's brother...a huge idiot, self centered putz, is starting trouble and saying we're rude for not inviting his 3 YEAR OLD and 6 YEAR OLD.

I'm FURIOUS AT BOTH MY FI And HIS BROTHER. I don't want children this age at our wedding! Also, if I invite them, I have to invite everyone's children..(that's like 40 children...I have around 50 first cousins)

Am I being crazy?

Jordan Posted: Nov 05, 2003 11:38 AM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

No, you are NOT being crazy - this was a decision that you and your FH came to together, some time ago. From the way it sounds, your FH is feeling some guilt from his brother - this will pass, stay firm.

The only children attending our wedding will be our 2 FGs. Personally, I think it's crazy that they'll be there - the wedding doesn't end until 1am. But I guess we have to follow some sort of ettiquette.

Robeymuse Posted: Nov 05, 2003 11:40 AM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

No we are not having children either. Every wedding I went ot with a FG and RB turned out with the children crying...
Anyway, I told everybody, all relatives and such that we are NOT having children. FMIL sort of flipped at first but everybody seems really understanding.
It is your wedding. Do what makes you happy. Your FBIL should understand.

mlp924 Posted: Nov 05, 2003 11:43 AM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

I have 3 children and LOVE adult only weddings! It is a nice night out for me. Chasing my children through someones wedding stinks! When they are in their late teens, I won't mind bringing them but for now...........Fuggedaboutit!

violet Posted: Nov 05, 2003 11:43 AM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

No, it's a personal choice on whether to have children at a wedding or not. I have 4 nieces and nephews ranging from 5-8 coming to my wedding. It's really up to you, and no one can make you feel bad for it. I had the opposite problem where FI's father was saying children shouldn't be at a wedding, and I said 'they're my family, and I'd like them there at my wedding.'

July2004Bride Posted: Nov 05, 2003 11:48 AM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

No, I don't think it's rude. I am not having any kids there except the ones in the bridal party...

wc0143 Posted: Nov 05, 2003 11:51 AM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

There will be NO children at our reception. our ceremony is going to be outside in a park and if relatives want to bring their kids (our nieces & nephews say) that is fine but that will probably be more of a hassle for the parents but again, that will be their decision. We are planning on having our rehearsal dinner at Dave & Buster's and including nieces & nephews. We wanted to do something fun to include them.

drewsgirl Posted: Nov 05, 2003 11:53 AM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

You are not being rude or crazy for not inviting them. I am doing the same thing - I even got the reception cards that say Adult Reception to follow. Its not that I don't love kids or don't want my little cousins there its just that gets a little too crazy sometimes when involving children. Besides most people I talk to love the idea of an adult only reception - its a night out for them.

eroxgirl Posted: Nov 05, 2003 11:53 AM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

I think its very RUDE for people to impose their opinions on others just because they don't get their way! and its not fair to children to force them to come to a wedding. Seriously now, is a 3 year old going to enjoy themselves? Unfortunately, I lost this battle and will have some children at my wedding (and when their parents can't enjoy themselves for chasing after their kids I'll sit back and relax), but your invitations are already out, so don't worry about it! As CP said, your FH is probably just getting pressure from his brother. It will pass!

Xelindrya Posted: Nov 05, 2003 11:57 AM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

Nope not rude.
It's a choice.

Ours personally is to have any and all I know we will have a toddler there. Less than a year old. If his mother wants to leave early I wont be offend but she is one of my very good friends so her coming from Nashville to New York for my wedding is more than enough for me to be happy about.

I always liked the look of a little girl twirling on a dance floor as she dances on his feet. I love the image. All dressed up and such. But I have empty seats so it's not an issue for me, if I had a limit then I'd ask them not to bring the children.

It's not rude.

112903 Posted: Nov 05, 2003 12:01 PM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

The only children that will be there are my 3 nephews and our flower girl

nrvbrd Posted: Nov 05, 2003 12:03 PM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

Not rude at all. I made this known to everyone when I was planning my wedding.

NO KIDS!!!!

GIGIBRIDE04 Posted: Nov 05, 2003 12:10 PM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

I'M NOT HAVING CHILDREN AT MY WEDDING.I DON'T THINK IT'S RUDE, BESIDES IT'S A NIGHT OUT FOR THE PARENTS.

MarcellaBella Posted: Nov 05, 2003 12:14 PM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

You are not crazy and you have every right to be furious... If you don't want kids, which I totally understand b/c I didn't want any either, then don't.. end of story.

littlecat Posted: Nov 05, 2003 12:22 PM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

It is not rude - It is hard in your situation b/c you have so many 1st cousins. I didn't want kids but i never not wanted my little nieces and sisters at my wedding.

They were actually so cute at the wedding dancing all around the dance floor all night. I depends how close he is to his brother. I am close with my sister and nieces and if he told me that i couldn't invite them i would tell him to go to h e l l . It is hard but maybe you could limit it to nieces and nephews but no cousins. People didn't get mad at me b/c my nieces and sisters were there.

Do you have any nieces and nephews?

dustaoglu Posted: Nov 05, 2003 12:38 PM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

its not rude to state what you want or dont want at your wedding. However it is rude to print on invitations, no children allowed. When we were young, we never actually attented weddings, because my mom never felt comfortable with us being there, so she herself never went. Today, most moms take their kids, and forget that they have children. I mean if you are bringing kids, atleast have consideration to look after your kids. its not the kids fault they are children, its the parents who are not responsible for them. We had about 10 kids at my wedding, I never told anyone no kids, because I could never do that. I dont have alot of kids in my family, and most people did not bring their kids. HOwever if someone really wanted to attend my wedding and cannot leave their child to a babysitter, I would not want them to miss out on my wedding just because he/she cannot bring their child.
It all depends on your beliefs, and desire. Everyone has a different opinion on this, do what you think is right.
good luck

NYCHICK Posted: Nov 05, 2003 12:41 PM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

That is not rude at all, I think an adult only wedding is absolutely great, I have decided to not invite my ringbearer because he tends to be a crybaby at times even though he is six. the only children I will be having are my 3 flower girls. YOUR WEDDING YOUR RULES

halloweenbride04 Posted: Nov 05, 2003 12:53 PM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

I don't think it's rude either. I do NOT want kids at my reception either. There's a time and a place and my reception is not it...sorry!

Chloegirl Posted: Nov 05, 2003 01:05 PM

Re: Do you think it's 'rude' to have NO CHILDREN at your wedding?

You are definitely not rude to make this decision. Kids definitely change the wedding a bit and if you just want adults than people should understand that.

YOUR CHOICE....its also an issue of the drawing the line at some point....like you said if you invite one child or family you have to invite them all and that causes a much larger wedding (that you might not want) plus more $$$.

Be confident with your decision. The only child at my wedding will be my 3 1/2 year old SIL....she is my flower girl...other than that no kids are invited!!