Don't mean to be tacky but...

Original post by Byrne2Be

Nov 29, 2010 04:45 PM

gift OR cash for a wedding present?!

DH and I were shocked by the # of gifts we received for our wedding! I guess bc we always just write out checks.

I mean don't get me wrong...a 30 lb Tiffanys crystal bowl is cool but 500 bones would have been much cooler!

Thoughts?

BrideNatalie Posted: Nov 30, 2010 03:18 PM

Re: Don't mean to be tacky but...

money!!!

luckycouple05 Posted: Nov 30, 2010 03:23 PM

Re: Don't mean to be tacky but...

I didnt have such a big bridal shower (only like 10-15 girls) and I think this is why DH and I got soooooo much cash!!!!! And trust me, I give cash and I rather see green than a plate setting IMO.

anszusterman Posted: Nov 30, 2010 03:25 PM

Re: Don't mean to be tacky but...

Posted by IrishAli

NY area people usually give cash (or checks!) but outside of that, it is often considered rude to give a gift of cash. Since FH's family is from Maryland, Iowa, and Louisiana, we purposefully registered for few physical items and made a large Honeymoon Registry hoping that they will choose a 'gift' from that

Speaking as an OOTer myself, I informed FH my entire side will be bringing gifts. It is considered rude to bring cash to a wedding- it shows you do not know the couple well enough to get them a real gift. FH is a NYer, and he agrees with all you ladies that cash is king.

So I am guessing it will be close to a 50/50 split at our wedding.

P.S.- we didn't do an engagement party or bridal shower

BriansWifey Posted: Nov 30, 2010 06:47 PM

Re: Don't mean to be tacky but...

we always give cash/a check. i dont wanna lug around a gift during CH and im positive the couple would much rather get money

FutureJOC Posted: Nov 30, 2010 07:26 PM

Re: Don't mean to be tacky but...

Absolutely cash, if I attended the wedding.

If I couldn't make the wedding for whatever reason, that is the only time that I would probably give a gift (something off of their registry that they did not receive at the shower).

tiffndan611 Posted: Dec 01, 2010 06:40 PM

Re: Don't mean to be tacky but...

giving gifts @ a wedding is a little tacky. those are more for the wedding shower or so on. not at the actual reception. now they dont end up paying there plate !!!!

SoonToBeMrsONeill Posted: Dec 02, 2010 02:47 PM

Re: Don't mean to be tacky but...

Come on ladies... the real gift is the love that you are sharing with your newly wed husband, family and friends.... We all know that love is really hidden in the form of money so either way... a gift is a gift

SoonToBeMrsONeill Posted: Dec 02, 2010 02:48 PM

Re: Don't mean to be tacky but...

Posted by tiffndan611

giving gifts @ a wedding is a little tacky. those are more for the wedding shower or so on. not at the actual reception. now they dont end up paying there plate !!!!

This is true but I don't expect HALF of the guests to pay their plate... haha... our fault for picking a semi expensive hall but it's the truth, we're not expecting much at all lol

CappyGirl Posted: Dec 02, 2010 03:12 PM

Re: Don't mean to be tacky but...

Posted by SoonToBeMrsONeill

Posted by tiffndan611

giving gifts @ a wedding is a little tacky. those are more for the wedding shower or so on. not at the actual reception. now they dont end up paying there plate !!!!

This is true but I don't expect HALF of the guests to pay their plate... haha... our fault for picking a semi expensive hall but it's the truth, we're not expecting much at all lol

It's an interesting debate. A few of my college friends who are very well off and well-to-do would NEVER give money as a gift. They gave us gifts and I gave them gifts at their weddings. Apparently it is considered rude/gauche whatever to give money, which assumes that they need it - when they don't. Does that make sense?