That is tough, but I would definitely not say anything. That would really hurt FH. I love my ring, but if I didnt I still woujldn't say anything.
KYBride09
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Re: E-ring drama
It is a tough situation. I don't care about sizes or even if I got a ring. All I care about is that I found the person I love and am going to spend the rest of my life with him. Out of curiosity, who has an e-ring less than 1 carat????
DnY
Posted:
Member since
Re: E-ring drama
an ex-friend went through this. she told her fiance, and he was very upset. in the end she said he 'understood' and told her that he will get her the ring she deserves someday. Had this been MY fiance, he would have taken the ring back and found another girl
VenusS
Posted:
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Re: E-ring drama
i don't think she should because it is the meaning behind the engagement ring that's bigger than anything. the E-ring is his committment to her 'supposedly' for a lifetime. i think it would really ruin things but if it doesn't, it would only make them stronger (-= contradicting..but yea..good luck to your friend..
HamptonsBride
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Member since
Re: E-ring drama
Posted by KYBride09
It is a tough situation. I don't care about sizes or even if I got a ring. All I care about is that I found the person I love and am going to spend the rest of my life with him. Out of curiosity, who has an e-ring less than 1 carat????
I would've been happy using my grandmother's e-ring which is 1/4 carat...to me it wasn't about the ring i wore...but who gave it to me...hope your co-worker realizes that's what's important...the quality of the man you are marrying...not the ring he gives you.
KSquared
Posted:
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Re: E-ring drama
Honestly, I would have been happy with a freakin reshaped paperclip. I had no input whatsoever on my ring, and I couldn't care less about that. It is a gorgeous ring - but it's not even about that. Marraige has gotten so commercial and this is a blaring example of that. Who cares what your ring looks like as long as it was given to you by the person you love more than anything. She definitly should NOT say anything to him- that;s horribly rude and makes me question whether she's really ready to get married....sorry, JMO.
MrsZtoBe
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Re: E-ring drama
Wowww....
There are some very strong opinions about this. I understand what everyone is saying.
However, you don't know her situation. The ring IS important to some people. You are wearing it for the rest of your life... it would be nice if you get to LOVE it. FH wanted me involved in picking it out and making sure it was just right for me to be sure I loved it.
I'm not saying she should say something- all of you are right it might hurt him. At least she was seeking someone else's opinion first.
She might not be such a terrible, superficial person. JMO
Colette
Posted:
Member since
Re: E-ring drama
Posted by KYBride09
She told me that they have been together for 7 years and she always spoke about wanting to get a 2 carat ring. She feels that he should have waited a bit longer until he was able to afford it…… I was speechless!!
Well I have no problem saying she sounds like a brat. Also, they're together 7 years... if she's 'always spoken about a 2 carat ring' and FH got her 1 carat... well, there's a REASON! I think he should have waited too, but for a different reason.
Lastly whether she tells him or not, I think her disappointment is going to be very obvious to him.
shell1879
Posted:
Member since
Re: E-ring drama
did she ever think maybe it's what he could afford?
that is beyond horrible I actually told FH to get smaller... he was looking at 3.5 ct. mine is 1 ct total 1/2 center stone and 1/2 side stones my ring
NEVER EVER EVER tell a man it's not good enough.... he got it for a reason
curiousgeorge
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Member since
Re: E-ring drama
Ridiculous!
First the most important thing about a diamond is the quality and clarity NOT the size. A two carat ring can cost just as much as a one carat depending on quality. She needs to really ask herself if this is truely going to make her happier. It sounds to me like shes missing something in her relationship so she needs to make up for it elsewhere....like the size of her diamond....give me a break....
RockysGirl
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Re: E-ring drama
It sounds to me like shes missing something in her relationship so she needs to make up for it elsewhere....like the size of her diamond....give me a break....
I totally agree. Nobody yell at me for saying this, because I'm really not trying to sound judgmental, but in my experience - the people I've known who NEED that big flashy diamond, are usually the ones who are lacking something in their relationship. The couples I've known who are just SO in love and cherish each other with all their hearts don't usually need that crazy expensive ring. Their love is enough.
I'm definitely not trying to put down anybody who owns a big, expensive e-ring. This is just what I've seen and experienced. JMO. Hope I didn't offend anybody.
sophisticat13
Posted:
Member since
Re: E-ring drama
I would tell her not to...what if he thinks that she cares about the ring size more than she cares about the commitment to him it represents? When you get engaged, you do the best you can and then build your future from there...I know so many women who made their first diamonds into neclaces and replaced the original diamond with a bigger one!!! ETA: I agree that something is lacking in their relationship...the bigger diamond represents something to her that is missing
MrsZtoBe
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Re: E-ring drama
I don't see the difference between wanting a 2 carat ring and wanting orchids flown in for your centerpieces or an expensive wedding gown... it's all money out of your wedding budget.
I feel like this girl might have been venting to a friend and now she is being made out to be a horrible person. JMO
grrulz
Posted:
Member since
Re: E-ring drama
this is a very delicate subject because to some girls size does matter. I really feel that when you get a ring its soo special not just the ring...but the commitment. I feel that she shouldn't tell him because it will hurt his feelings. I know she must be feeling bad but he should think about her FH as well she doesn't know how long it took him to save for it??? or maybe he feels that there are other bigger things to invest in the future...like a wedding or buying a house which i think is really important. I know some ladies might be saying 'but if you were her you will probably feel bad' and I agree I don't know how she feels because I am not in that situation but I certainly could say that she should think things over before acting...
Colette
Posted:
Member since
Re: E-ring drama
Posted by MrsZtoBe
I don't see the difference between wanting a 2 carat ring and wanting orchids flown in for your centerpieces or an expensive wedding gown... it's all money out of your wedding budget.
I feel like this girl might have been venting to a friend and now she is being made out to be a horrible person. JMO
I would say its incredibly disrespectful to 'dis' the man you love to a coworker, which is what she's doing; its not like she and the OP are bffs and she was sharing this in confidence. She just sounds incredibly immature imo. And it differs greatly from priotizing a wedding budget together - since he bought the ring unilaterally, so her lack of graciousness is really startling.
Cpt2007
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Re: E-ring drama
um....greedy much? also, what are her motivations for getting engaged to begin with? DH could have gotten me a cigar wrapper and I still would have said yes.
RockysGirl
Posted:
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Re: E-ring drama
um....greedy much? also, what are her motivations for getting engaged to begin with? DH could have gotten me a cigar wrapper and I still would have said yes.
I used to tell my FH before we were engaged that if it meant marrying him with only a RING POP instead of a diamond, I'd still do it. (between you and me tho, I'm glad he went with the diamond - but I know for a fact that I would still love him and marry him no matter what)
Cpt2007
Posted:
Member since
Re: E-ring drama
Posted by RockysGirl
I used to tell my FH before we were engaged that if it meant marrying him with only a RING POP instead of a diamond, I'd still do it. (between you and me tho, I'm glad he went with the diamond - but I know for a fact that I would still love him and marry him no matter what)
It's so funny you say this. That's what DH said to me all the time and that i'd have my choice of flavors. And wouldn't you know it? When he proposed, he had a ring pop right there with him (and the real ring, of course).
erika99
Posted:
Member since
Re: E-ring drama
If he's just being cheap and he defenetly can afford a bigger ring, I would say something. The ring is very important to some people and you have to wear it for the rest of your life. It's not fair to her to have something on her that she hates. If he just can't afford something bigger and she knows it, then that's just so wrong. I would never. It's about the person you love not the bling!
RockysGirl
Posted:
Member since
Re: E-ring drama
Posted by RockysGirl
I used to tell my FH before we were engaged that if it meant marrying him with only a RING POP instead of a diamond, I'd still do it. (between you and me tho, I'm glad he went with the diamond - but I know for a fact that I would still love him and marry him no matter what)
It's so funny you say this. That's what DH said to me all the time and that i'd have my choice of flavors. And wouldn't you know it? When he proposed, he had a ring pop right there with him (and the real ring, of course).
That's soooo cute! This past year (before me and FH were engaged) with the gift I gave him for Valentines Day, I also threw in a Ring Pop with it. It was so funny, because that 'joke' had been going on between us for some time. He saved it, but it's too gross to keep forever. lol. I love that your FH gave one to you when he proposed. Good Thinking.
