Anyone have trouble or having trouble getting off from work for your wedding or honeymoon? I am taking off for 11 days for my wedding and honeymoon and everyone keeps looking at me like I am crazy. We are going on our honeymoon for three weeks (driving out west). It is only eleven days I will actually be taking off and we have a one week vacation in between from school (free week). Everyone at my job is telling me it probably won't get approved and I have to write a letter to the Superintendent. Anyone else have problems with employer. We are dead set on this vacation. It is our once in a lifetime wedding and honeymoon. If it comes down to it, should I quit or shorten my honeymoon. FH will be extremely mad if we have to shorten it. I hate the fact of someone telling me what to do. It is not the best job anyway. I am not making all that much and come December I will have my Master's Degree and can go look for a better job when we get back from our honeymoon. Any opinions. Help!!! I am ready to cry. I don't want to be put in a situation where I have to choose my job or my husband. Of course I'll choose my husband, but I will be giving up a decent job in a place I love with prospects of a better job opening up at the end of next year. Why do people have to be so difficult. This is a once in a lifetime thing. It is not like I will be taking this time off every year.
ChristineC68
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Re: Employer problems (long)
How are things like this normally handled where you work? Who is telling you it will be denied - your supervisor or co-workers?
I think you should talk to you supervisor and see what they say and do what you need to do to get the HM of your dreams. Maybe you will have to write a letter to the Superintendent, you never know what they may say, but I wouldn't want to wonder about this for the next 9 months. My stress and anxiety levels would go through the roof:)
Another option is to take a shorter HM right away and do your cross country trip in the summer when schools are closed.
Good luck
Sunny
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Find out if you can get it off or not before making any decisions. Are you a teacher? I have heard it is hard to get off so much time during the year because you are off all summer.
MrsTC
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YES! I had the same problem, I posted about it like a month ago. I had a job offer retracted because the boss didn't like that I would be taking time off in September (unpaid of course).
Please don't cry
It is so unfair of them to deny you of this. Like you said, it is once in a lifetime. Do what is in your heart! If you have to write a letter than so be it! Be aggressive!! Good luck
Boop2704
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The head of my union is telling me it probably won't get approved. She told me not to bother about it yet. That what I feel is important to me (Honeymoon) is not important to the administration, and I should not bother them with it now because its the end of the year. Hello woman... I need to actually book the HM. I don't want to book a whole HM and have to cancel it in October, I need to know now. I am going to sit down tonight and write a letter to the Superintendent. I am also going to make an appointment to go in and meet with him.
Boop2704
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I am a Special Education Intervention Teacher. It's a fancy name for a classroom Assistant. It pays bad too. But I am hoping to get something next year.
MrsTC
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Take a deep breath before you write the letter....and make sure you mention how valuable you think your job is !!
meghanmetz
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This really only applies if you are a teacher (which it sounds like) , but I never had a teacher take off any amount of time close to that ever in school. I know that FI and I planned our wedding around when the busiest times for work. (I start full time at a Big 4 accounting firm in two months) and I chose a summer date because I knew it would be easier to get the vacation time, he's in finance and summers are definitely easiest, at least at his firm.
Not to mention, I dont think it would advantageous to students to have a teacher gone for that amount of time.
Sorry, this is just my opinion, but they (co-workers) may have a point.
wowlifeisgood
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Ok here are my two cents.
First like some gals said above I wouldn't pay attention to the other co-workers.
You are completly entitled to enjoy every moment of your wedding including having a honeymoon of your dreams.
I would talk first and really only to the one who can make that decision. If they say no and you need to write a letter to the super intendant I would.
Someone said above take a deep breath and write completly from your heart. That this is something that you've dreamt about your entire life since you were the age of the kids you are teaching now and that by allowing you this time to fufill one of your long time dreams it not only makes you a better person but also a better teacher. And you are teaching this kids that anything is possible. Then ask the highest up not to take this childhood dream away from you. You teach your kids where there is will there is a way. And that hard work begets great things in life. Just like you working hard to pay for this honeymoon and even planning it around a week you already had off.
I'm sorry 11 days isn't that big of a deal for something that truly is a life changing moment.
Stand your ground. At least you know you tried.
Please let me know what happens.
One more thing I would actually write out the letter before you even go to the top that way you can be fueled with more specific things you can say to your immediate supervisor and then if that doesn't work then go higher up.
Good luck and let me know.
Boop2704
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Update, I just told FH that we might not to go where we had our hearts set on going for HM and he is really hurt and heartbroken. He said that this is where we both had our hearts set on going. I feel sooo bad. Well, I am sending my letter out for the time off next week, I hope they give it to me. Keep your fingers crossed for me please.
He also said that if we really couldn't do our cross country HM, we'll have to do something less time consuming, but all that matters is that we'll be together. I love him so much...can't wait to marry him.
julybride444
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Can you pick another time to go? We were thinking about going 6 months after the wedding b/c the place we were originally thinking of going isn't best visited in August.
We also picked summer b/c it's easiest for FH to get time off. We would have gone another time if not. Unfortunately, most places you work, if you're valued, will have limits on when vacation can be taken. I'd never leave my office in April or October when big events and publications are on the board, I always take summer or holiday vacations.
groovypeg
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OMG!!! WHERE DO YOU WORK!!!
I am also a special ed classroom teacher for a private school and the exact same thing happened to me. i wanted november 14, 2004 and my director told me there was no way she would approve me for 2 weeks off. so we compromised and i am now getting married on nov 21, 2004 and will have probably 3 days off plus the 2 days for thanksgiving. we will take a mini-moon to a bed and breakfast afterwards. we decided to take our honeymoon in february so that we can go on a cruise and save money for it! maybe this is an option for you.
please let me know what happens and if you need someone to vent to, give me some FM!!!
PS. If you need a new job, let me know. my job is always hiring!!
Boop2704
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Unfortunately, Summer is the busiest time for his business. We really have no good time to go. We picked the time that we did because I do have an excused week of vacation thrown in between the two other weeks I want to take off. I guess I am just going to wait and see if they give it to me. If they don't I don't know what I'll do, but I know I won't be happy. I know I am asking a lot, but this is a big event in my life. I have been there for three years and have never done anything like this before. I am valued at my school, more now than ever.
maysie18
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altho I'm not a teacher, I totally feel your pain!
My job approves time off maybe a 1-3 weeks before you're scheduled to be off. They say don't plan anything that can't be changed in case you don't get approved. So basically, I'm supposed to pay more $ for hotel/airline & put my life on hold til admin decides that they wanna go over & approve employee vacation requests.
I've talked directly w/my supervisor about our October wedding/HM plans & she doesn't see a problem w/me gettgn the time off, but can't guarantee that & claims she'll keep my request at the top of the list. I'm having same problems re: my bach party - myself & 6 friends are going to New Orleans July 4 weekend to celebrate & me as the bride is the only 1 who hasn't yet been approved to get teh time off yet!
I'm taking off 15 days for wedding/HM, cuz they won't let me take any more time than that, even tho its due me.
I've already decided that if they don't give it to me, I'm taking it. I may lose my job but luckily thank God I've never had a problem getting one in the past. Our HM is just about paid off - so either they won't pay me or they'll fire me, but either way I won't be at work.
Sorry to turn this into a big ole vent, guess this thread just brought out all that anger in me about the situation! Good luck I hope you get the time off!
groovypeg
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unfortunately, it really doesnt matter how long you have been at a place. i am a head teacher and have been at my school for 4 years and i was told i could be replaced! it totally stinks!!! good luck!
JodiBabe
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I had no problem getting two weeks off. I put in for it right after New Years and it was signed the same day!
Boop2704
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Well, if they have to replace me, I won't be too upset. I don't have my own class yet, I am only an assistant.
I actually had a plan w/ FH months ago, but I chickened out.
I get my Master's in Sp Ed in December, and I was going to quit my job at that time and finish all the wedding plans. Then after we got back from our HM I was going to look for a new job. But I sort of backed out of this plan because I know I'll go crazy not working, I love my job and I love the children I work with and I know i'll miss them. But I have to do what's best for me.
eternityawaits
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Re: Employer problems (long) Update
Thankfully my boss really likes me... if it was up to anyone else I wouldn't be able to go because I'm taking off the busiest week of the year (aside from christmas, of course!) He took it really well, he just said 'Write it on the calendar, but we'll miss you!'
The only catch is I'm taking about 11 days surrounding the wedding, but it has to be unpaid. I used all my paid time when FFIL had surgery and was sick this year.
yabbobay
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Re: Employer problems (long) Update
this is pretty much unheard of in a school...having to pay a subsitute for you...means that they are losing out on money...so thats why I don't think the chance of getting it approved is high...
BUT if you are thinking of leaving anyway...you can do that...BUT write a VERY neutral letter...don't complain or sound bitter...you WILL need their recommendation if you plan on staying in the school system...
best of luck!!!
michele31
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Re: Employer problems (long) Update
I think you should listen to your fellow teachers because working for a school system is very different than working for a corporate employeer. I will say that I think brides/grooms need to consider a lot of things when planning a wedding/HM dates. One of them is their work schedule. I haven't heard of many teachers that plan their wedding/HMs during the first few weeks of school, especially when you have some of June and all of July and August off. I think if I was the employeer I would not approve the time off, in all honestly, unless their was some amazing reason that you needed to plan it so close to the first day of school.
