Engaged or not? (with poll)

Engaged or not? (with poll)

I recently spoke to a bridesmaid of mine who informed that she just recently got engaged. She gave me a long drawn out story of how it went down but ended it with the fact that she does not have a ring yet and that her FH has to save up for one. I congratulated her anyway because she seems happy. But when I told my FH about this, he laughed and said then they are not really engaged they just talked about getting married. I was interested to know what you ladies think about this subject.

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

I do not think that the ring is important at all. FH and I had been talking for years about getting married and he said he'd do it right then and there if he could afford a ring. I told him that I didn't care if I had a ring or not that I loved him and just wanted to be married to him. I did get a ring when he was able to afford one but if he would have proposed without it I would have said yes and never thought twice about not really being engaged because I didn't have one.

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

My sister was 'engaged' and planned her destination without a ring. She decided she didnt want an engagement ring (she is now a stay at home mom) and opted to wait until the wedding and get a REALLY nice wedding band from Tiffanys. So, yes, I think she can be engaged without the ring....

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

I guess it depends on the situation and the people but more times than not, I see all these stupid girls that are more excited about the thought of a wedding then the actual marriage. If you are in a relationship where you both share finances and you feel that you can not afford it, that's one thing. But to jump the gun and not really care what happens just so long as you can say 'im engaged' is just kinda stupid. So for the most part unless you have a date or something to confirm the fact, I really don't think you are engaged with out the ring ... IMHO

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Personally, I don't think people will take you seriously without the ring. JMO

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

well it depends -

like if you decide that you dont WANT a ring - and you are NEVER going to get one. . . you can still be engaged if you are planning to get married.

but if you are talking about marriage and you are thinking of getting a ring down the line - i think the ring is the official 'point' of the engagement if that makes sense.

i mean i am not saying it is SOOOO important but i think that for the most part receiving hte ring is when it is made 'official' unless you both come to an agreement that there will be no ring at all.

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

The ring is just a symbol of the engagement. It is nice, but not necessary. My mom never got an engagement ring and she and my dad have been married over 30 years.

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

I've been with FI for about 7 years, this year we decided to get married, there was no romantic proposal and as of now no engagement ring yet (I dont know if I will be getting one) However we set a date and both have been working on the wedding arrangements together(booked RH, Church, Florist - all major vendors ) He just bought a nice condo on the beach for us,and he is paying for most of the wedding, so even though I would love an e-ring, would not be upset if I don't get one.

So I will say it depends on circumstances, the e-ring is a symbol not a must and not everyone can afford it but if they had a casual conversation and no arrangements, no thought of possible dates or furher developments then may not be 'really an engagement'

We have been talking about getting married for the last couple of years but did not consider myself 'engaged' until we set the date and then booked the venue.

sorry for the long answer hope my situation gave you insight from a different perspective

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)

Just playing devils advocate here would you ladies say the same thing would apply if you were married, but didn't have any wedding bands? Isn't that what makes a wedding ceremony . . . the exchanging of the rings. IMO if the girl says she is engaged, then she is engaged. I just found it interesting that FH (and his best man) said that she is not because there is no ring, thats why I posted this poll. I also find it interesting that these are men who are saying this, not women.

Re: Engaged or not? (with poll)