Engagement Party and/or Shower

Chrissa Posted: Jul 30, 2004 06:01 PM

Engagement Party and/or Shower

I just found this part of the web site and I love it. All the things I have read have been so helpful! Thank you to everyone!

So now it is my turn to ask a question...

I got engaged 7/16, my parents are planning on an engagement party sometime in September. My wedding day is July 1 05.

If I have an engagement party is it greedy or tacky to have a shower closer to the actual wedding? Or is it an either or thing?

Thanks for all your help!

MegLehner Posted: Jul 30, 2004 06:12 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

Some people have both. I personally think engagement parties are a bit tacky, especially if registry info is included.

Shea Posted: Jul 30, 2004 06:14 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

my engagement party was a year before my shower....i just had my shower like 2 weeks ago!

chris605 Posted: Jul 30, 2004 06:14 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

Being your getting married soon I wouldnt have one - BUT its a preference - Do what makes you happy...

Congrats on the engagement

jill13bean Posted: Jul 30, 2004 06:19 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

I personally think it is tacky... asking for too much
either or for me...JMO

we will be enaged for 1 year and 9 months when we get married and still with that time difference we didnt have both

but it is all up to you

Janine24 Posted: Jul 30, 2004 06:19 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

it's fine to have an e-party and shower...
I did not have an e-party but are having 2 showers (upstate & one on LI)...

Stacey04 Posted: Jul 30, 2004 06:34 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

I had an e-party last Sep and my shower will be this Sep. You have to figure your shower will probably be about 2 months before your wedding.

I know someone that had an e-party, shower and a wedding all in 8 months.

suven Posted: Jul 30, 2004 06:40 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

Posted by Chrissa

I just found this part of the web site and I love it. All the things I have read have been so helpful! Thank you to everyone!

So now it is my turn to ask a question...

I got engaged 7/16, my parents are planning on an engagement party sometime in September. My wedding day is July 1 05.

If I have an engagement party is it greedy or tacky to have a shower closer to the actual wedding? Or is it an either or thing?

Thanks for all your help!

Ok, this made me laugh...NOT AT ALL BECAUSE OF YOU...

Anyway, I am going to an engagement party tomorrow. This couple get engaged on Valentine's day of this year. They are getting married on November 7 of this year...

And, her bridal shower will be at the end of September...

Anyway, it's not at all tacky for you to have your e-party in September. And, you will be fine if you have a shower closer to the wedding.

I had an e-party 22 months before my wedding. My shower was 2 months before my wedding...

suven Posted: Jul 30, 2004 06:40 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

Posted by Stacey04

I know someone that had an e-party, shower and a wedding all in 8 months.

Gotcha beat...going to an e-party tomorrow. The shower will be in Sept 04. The wedding is in Nov 04. (they've been engaged since Valentine's Day)

sarahthegreat Posted: Jul 30, 2004 07:12 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

we got engaged on nov.1, 2003 - our e-party was this past saturday (yeah!) our wedding is 2006. so, to answer your question its only tacky to have both if things are one on top of the other. no one wants to go to an e-party, then a bridal shower, then the wedding all in a matter of months. if you are getting married and don't want both, have a couples shower a few months before the wedding, that way you can get the things you need, w/o having your hand in everyone's pocket.

J&S Posted: Jul 30, 2004 07:26 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

I think it's fine to have an e-party and shower. It's not like your asking people for gifts. I mean it's a time to celebrate this special time in your lives so why not have a party. And your not getting married for another year so I think your fine.

tray831 Posted: Jul 30, 2004 09:41 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

I agree--its not like you're asking people for gifts, and besides, IMO, if the e-party and the shower are at least 8+ months apart, I dont consider it tacky---what I do find tacky is including registry cards in the e-party invites---thats Tacky!

WinterBride2005 Posted: Jul 30, 2004 09:49 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

You can do what you want. I think it depends on what you/family are used to. I don't think it is tacky to have an e-party and bridal shower at all. I don't agree with having both back to back.

With all this wedding planning, I realized that one person you can make happy is YOU. So, do what you want and don't worry about what other people have to say.. there is always one who will complain.

Chrissa Posted: Jul 31, 2004 07:59 AM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

Thanks for all the advice! I have to see what FIL want to do. FMIL may want to have a shower.

Nora101004 Posted: Aug 01, 2004 12:44 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

I think you can have an engagement party. DO NOT INCLUDE REGISTRY INFO W/ THE INVITES That is tacky. The only place registry info should be included is the shower.

I went to a wedding where they got engaged about a year before the wedding date. About 3 months before the wedding, they had a BYOF (bring your own food) e-party at a park where we had to pay for parking. 2 months before was the shower and then the wedding.

So, I think a Sept e-party, a shower 2 months before your wedding and your wedding is a fine schedule - as long as you provide all the food!

butterfly20 Posted: Aug 01, 2004 01:18 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

i think its fine.....
the shower will be a couple months before, and youll get stuff for the house......

the engagement party as long as its not right next to the shower is fine

August2004 Posted: Aug 01, 2004 01:41 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

I did not have engagement party because I too think they are tacky.

My friend got engaged last year but had her eparty six months before her wedding, her shower three months before and then we have to go to the wedding too. I think it is a bit much for people to do !!!

FutureMrs Posted: Aug 01, 2004 02:04 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

We didn't have an engagement party, I mean it would have been nice, but I think its asking too much from people. Plus its another expense that we cannot afford. We got tons of money and gifts for our engagement without even having a party.

nehaliasz Posted: Aug 01, 2004 02:16 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

We didn't have an engagement party for a reasons. We got engaged July 4th of last year, and since we live in CA, the first time we would be home to see everyone was around Christmas. The reason for having one, we felt, would be so everyone could get together and celebrate. Everyone was already doing that for the holidays. We also didn't want people feeling like they had to give us a gift, especially when so much money is being spent at that time on gifts for the holidays. We also got a lot of gifts and things from people for our engagement without having a party. It was nice because people did it because they wanted to, not because they felt they had to bring something to a party.

Bunnymonkey Posted: Aug 01, 2004 06:32 PM

Re: Engagement Party and/or Shower

Personally, I think an engagement party is only appropriate if the engagement will be a long one...over a year/year and a half. But, I have heard of people having them just to celebrate and have families meet, and not asking for presents. I think thats cool.