so i've always been very independent ... in that I do what I want when I want... fh used to hate it, but now its something he likes... for instance...if i want to do something and he doesnt, i'll still do it anyway...like a movie..if thers a girly movie and i know he wont see it, i'll go solo
fh's family does not understand this...they feel that fh and i should be attached to the hip... last saturday fh's parentals came over and were very shocked that fh was home alone....ummm bc jeannette (me) has stuff to do...duh this wknd is fh's aunt's pool party, i made planst to visit my bffl (also moh). she lives in lancaster, pa, so i plan on spending the whole wknd w/her and her baby. last night fh's mom calls and asked what time we were going to the pool party...fh said well jeannette is dropping me off at noon...i could hear her scream through the phone!!!! she asked why is he letting me do that???? he explained that i'm going away for the wknd..and she said...why do u let her go out so much??
ugh..this annoyed me and fh and i got into a fight about it.. mind u he's going to the jets (boooooooo) preseason game tonight....
anyway...idk..i'm annoyed now..and fh and i are not speaking to each other...
just bc we're engaged to be married does not mean that we have to do EVERYTHING together
Iluvpoodles
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Re: FH family vent
You sound exactly like me. I love doing things alone and having a little me time. He actually don't like going when I do girly things, like hair or nails. The last family party he had, which I didn't want to go to nor do I feel I have to go to every single one, he made a huge deal about that I had to go to it, anything he's invited to I must go and we are a couple, blah, blah and he shouldn't go to these things alone. Me and his mother are very, very different people so I know for a fact if I did what you did she would have some sort of comment. It is none of his family's business anyway.
Iluvpoodles
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Re: FH family vent
Posted by latinaj
Posted by Lsorrent
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say his parents are VERY TRADITIONAL??????????????
Luckily both my and FH's family realize that we are still our own people. But are your FH's parents that traditional that they still believe in the whole 'woman stays home while man works' thing too?????
YES...fh's parents share 1 bank account..... i've had a bank account since i was 18...my first words were 'checkbook!' lol... FH's parents do EVERYTHING Together, even shopping for anything and everything (they share 1 car and live in the suburbs where u need to drive everywhere!) my parents are complete opposite...my mom goes out w/her girsl sometimes, my dad goes out w/his friends, they have joint and separate accounts....
fh seemed ok w/this before but last night he flipped out after his mom yelled at him
Are you sure my FH and you FH aren't brothers lol.
grkbarbie
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Re: FH family vent
lol my mom didnt like and prob still doesnt like that i go out without fh
last saturday i was out and i accidentally called my mom at 3 am. i said 'o shyyyyyt' and hung up lmao
she claled back CRYING..OMG WHERE R UUU ? R U OK?? lololl i was laughing uncontrollably
next day i went over with fh and we laughed about it..she slike u went out withuot him again? im like uhh yea.. he doesnt dance and doesnt like the places i go to, sow hat am i guna do sit home? lol
he sticks up for me.
your fh should stick up for you. it will ease his moms mind A LOT.
Lu2700
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Re: FH family vent
why does he let u go out so much......? wowwwwww........
Jna2010
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Re: FH family vent
its a very old way of thinking, fh used to be like that but we quickly changed that!! lol
since you and fh seem to have worked out this aspect, i think its up to fh to defend you and your actions cuz with the way they think if you start speaking up i feel like theyll think that your too 'independent' for him and 'unruly', its ridiculous i know but i think its best if fh handles it
Nichole2010
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Re: FH family vent
is she still stuck in the 1852 where men controlled women? if so, someone needs to slap her and give her a reality check. that is ridiculous.
FH and I live together; therefore, we see each other everyyyy dayyyy.. I go out without him. He goes out without me. We go out together. it works. we dont have any problems.
you need your space
MikesBride2B
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Re: FH family vent
Ugh, I hate when FMILs think its alright to start fights between you and FH...my FMIL did the same thing when FH went back to Ohio...he was there for less than 24 hours and she managed to start a HUGE fight between us!!!
You need to sit down with FH and say straight out 'Does it bother you that I go out without you?' If he says yes, say something like 'Well it never bothered you before, are you only bothered because of FMIL?' Hopefully he'll see that he's being manipulated by her and calm down...
latinaj
Posted:
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Re: FH family vent
fh just left to the jets game.. he asked me to think abt going to his fam party tomorrow...he says he doesnt want to hear his fam talk bad abt me..... over 1 stupid bbq pool party i told him i wasnt going..i already promised my bffl that i was going to see her and babysit tom night...i feel like he's trying to manipulate the situation by being nice now...
