Getting serious about tipping- what are the 'new' rules- especiall Scotto girls- please help!

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Posted by hmpena

Jess,

Do what you can. Whatever you tip, it should be appreciated. I think we all have to keep in mind that tips are for a job well done... nowadays, so many vendors in this industry expect to be tipped rather than graciously accepting one for a good job.

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I am only going to tip out what FH and I can afford. I don't want to look cheap, I am using three of the same vendors as my twin sister did on her wedding.

Found this..........

- It is not necessary to tip the owners of the business but instead tip the employees that are providing the service. If the person providing the service is the company owner as well, a simple thank you card will be enough unless they go out of their way to provide you extraordinary business.

- Thank you cards are also a great way to show your appreaciation to your vendor for a job well done. Your thank you card may be used as a testimonial for other brides when they consider choosing that vendor.

Gratuities guidlines.

Here are some guide lines on who to tip, when, and how much.

Reception Staff (which include the manager, maitre d', waitstaff, bartenders, powder-room attandants, coat-check and parking attendants)
HOW MUCH? 15% - 20% of the final bill.
WHEN? Before the wedding day when the total bill amount is due.
WHO? The person responsible for paying the bill prior to the reception which most likely will be you.

Reception Staff if gratuities are optional.
HOW MUCH? $20 - $25 per waitstaff.
HOW MUCH? $20 - $25 per bartender or 10% of total bar tab. If you are going to tip the bartender, make sure that the bartender does not request tips from your guests.
HOW MUCH? $30 or more per reception manager/maitre'd depending on the size of the wedding.
HOW MUCH? For coat check, powder room attendants, and valet parking. $0.50 - $1 per guest and once again make sure guests don't double tip.
WHEN? At conclusion of the reception.
WHO? Best man or wedding coordinator.

Wedding Day Transportation Driver
HOW MUCH? 10% - 15% of total bill.
WHEN? Either before the wedding when paying the bill or before end of reception.
WHO? If paying before end of reception you can hand the envelope to the best man or the groom.

Hair Stylist, Make Up Artist, Estheticians, Etc.
HOW MUCH? 10%-15% of your total bill or your usual tip if you're a regular client.
WHEN? When paying bill and right after service.
WHO? Person responsible for bill.

Musicians At Reception
HOW MUCH? $20 - $25 per band member.
WHEN? After ceremony or before end of reception.
WHO? Best man or wedding coordinator.

DJ Entertainment
HOW MUCH? $50 - $100 if one dj present and $50 each if two are present. WHEN? At and of reception.
WHO? Best man or wedding coordinator.

Officiant
HOW MUCH? $100 or more. Many officiants will not accept a tip and instead you may want to donate to the church or organization the officiant belongs to. WHEN? After the ceremony. WHO? Best man or wedding coordinator.


Delivery Staff (Persons that will deliver to the reception or ceremony site)
HOW MUCH? $10 - $20 per person.
WHEN? Upon delivery or after setup.
WHO? Person in charge of accepting the delivery or setting up the ceremony or reception site.

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Posted by akaMrsT

Found this..........

- It is not necessary to tip the owners of the business but instead tip the employees that are providing the service. If the person providing the service is the company owner as well, a simple thank you card will be enough unless they go out of their way to provide you extraordinary business.

- Thank you cards are also a great way to show your appreaciation to your vendor for a job well done. Your thank you card may be used as a testimonial for other brides when they consider choosing that vendor.

Gratuities guidlines.

Here are some guide lines on who to tip, when, and how much.

Reception Staff (which include the manager, maitre d', waitstaff, bartenders, powder-room attandants, coat-check and parking attendants)
HOW MUCH? 15% - 20% of the final bill.
WHEN? Before the wedding day when the total bill amount is due.
WHO? The person responsible for paying the bill prior to the reception which most likely will be you.

Reception Staff if gratuities are optional.
HOW MUCH? $20 - $25 per waitstaff.
HOW MUCH? $20 - $25 per bartender or 10% of total bar tab. If you are going to tip the bartender, make sure that the bartender does not request tips from your guests.
HOW MUCH? $30 or more per reception manager/maitre'd depending on the size of the wedding.
HOW MUCH? For coat check, powder room attendants, and valet parking. $0.50 - $1 per guest and once again make sure guests don't double tip.
WHEN? At conclusion of the reception.
WHO? Best man or wedding coordinator.

Wedding Day Transportation Driver
HOW MUCH? 10% - 15% of total bill.
WHEN? Either before the wedding when paying the bill or before end of reception.
WHO? If paying before end of reception you can hand the envelope to the best man or the groom.

Hair Stylist, Make Up Artist, Estheticians, Etc.
HOW MUCH? 10%-15% of your total bill or your usual tip if you're a regular client.
WHEN? When paying bill and right after service.
WHO? Person responsible for bill.

Musicians At Reception
HOW MUCH? $20 - $25 per band member.
WHEN? After ceremony or before end of reception.
WHO? Best man or wedding coordinator.

DJ Entertainment
HOW MUCH? $50 - $100 if one dj present and $50 each if two are present. WHEN? At and of reception.
WHO? Best man or wedding coordinator.

Officiant
HOW MUCH? $100 or more. Many officiants will not accept a tip and instead you may want to donate to the church or organization the officiant belongs to. WHEN? After the ceremony. WHO? Best man or wedding coordinator.


Delivery Staff (Persons that will deliver to the reception or ceremony site)
HOW MUCH? $10 - $20 per person.
WHEN? Upon delivery or after setup.
WHO? Person in charge of accepting the delivery or setting up the ceremony or reception site.

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thank you so much for the info.
I forgot about tipping the coat check and the valet

My FH & I were just discussing this last night! I don't want to seem 'cheap' either but as my FH put it, this is their 'JOB' & in today's day in age, everyone expects to get paid a 'tip' on top of what we pay to the company.

We decided that we will do $2pp for the Maitre D. My FH will have extra $$ on him if he deems it necessary to pay extra.

The Bridal Attendant-I intend on giving what i think is 'acceptable' to my standards. I will be playing it by ear & seeing what happens

Limo- We already paid gratuity with the bill but will probably throw an extra $20 at the drivier.

Florist- I will tip the delivery guy just like any other time I receive flowers

Band-FH feels that we are feeding them & that is sufficient enough. I am still deciding on what to do here but if anything, it will be $20 per member

Photo/video - Like Hollie said, we will not be doing this at the time of the wedding. I want to see how my pictures come out & the albums & then we will tip accordingly.

In all honesty, we do not have more then $200 left in our account when this is all over & done with. As Christine had stated before, all these vendors are getting paid their 'normal' salaries that day too. Whatever we give them for their services extra should not have a specific $$ value, I feel it should be based on how well they 'do' their job! No one tips me when I do my job well!!!!

question:
if your limo is just a drop off are you tipping -

were just getting dropped off at the hall - were staying at the hotel next door .....should we still tip?

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Posted by kissy27

My FH & I were just discussing this last night! I don't want to seem 'cheap' either but as my FH put it, this is their 'JOB' & in today's day in age, everyone expects to get paid a 'tip' on top of what we pay to the company.

We decided that we will do $2pp for the Maitre D. My FH will have extra $$ on him if he deems it necessary to pay extra.

The Bridal Attendant-I intend on giving what i think is 'acceptable' to my standards. I will be playing it by ear & seeing what happens

Limo- We already paid gratuity with the bill but will probably throw an extra $20 at the drivier.

Florist- I will tip the delivery guy just like any other time I receive flowers

Band-FH feels that we are feeding them & that is sufficient enough. I am still deciding on what to do here but if anything, it will be $20 per member

Photo/video - Like Hollie said, we will not be doing this at the time of the wedding. I want to see how my pictures come out & the albums & then we will tip accordingly.

In all honesty, we do not have more then $200 left in our account when this is all over & done with. As Christine had stated before, all these vendors are getting paid their 'normal' salaries that day too. Whatever we give them for their services extra should not have a specific $$ value, I feel it should be based on how well they 'do' their job! No one tips me when I do my job well!!!!

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I agree with you 200%

DH tipped and I think some people didn't get all that they should have but budgets get tight. We didn't tip the wait staff and paid the 18% but I know that doens't make it into the hands of the staff- it's a bogus charge. ( I know kids in the catering business- at least that's true where they work but it's not my problem- sounds cruel but there's only so much I can do!) I think we gave Roy 700 but I wanted to do a little more. FH said 3-5 is fair but I only budgeted 2-3 b/c that's what they originally told me.

We gave the bridal attendant 150- Jenn- she did a very good job but I didn't need much. FH said that 75-150 is fair.

We gave the DJ 100 and the MC 100 or 150 tho I DH wants to go back and give him more b/c he did such a great job. The MC is a part owner- I think you should tip owners too tho if you pay extra for them I don't know....

we tipped the photographer 200 and assistant 100 ( tho I wanted to give him 150- I know him from my photography classes- he helps to run the lab) we may give more later....

florist delvery guys- I only saw one guy- gave him $40 assuming there was at least one other guy in the truck. They say 10-20 per delivery guy but I don't see them at the hall!

Limos- about 40-50 for the ones taking us from the hotel to the chruch and chruch to hall....the end of the night guys got a little less- I think 20. I'd feel bad not giving them a little something even if it's a quick run. We gave the guy who drove us tot he airport 20 the next day! We had 5 drivers the day of the wedding (2 in the am and 3 at night) tho I just found out one driver got cranky at my BP and threatened to make them walk- they were roudy but not horrible! Wish I knew that at the time!

Hair and Makeup people etc- I usually tip about 20% anyway and sometimes round up. They all did an amazing job for us!

Didn't tip bartenders or valet, coatroom....we shared the coatroom and valet guys anyway....

OH- I don't remember what DH tipped the videographer but I think it was 150- he's also an owner...


I think that's it! Tipping is hard!

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Posted by kellwolfe

question:
if your limo is just a drop off are you tipping -

were just getting dropped off at the hall - were staying at the hotel next door .....should we still tip?

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Honestly, I would treat it just like that - a taxi and I tip my taxi driver. I would tip about $15 the most, but it's based on what you're paying.

This is what we did:

Maitre'D == $500 (we have 140 people)
Bridal Attendant - $50
MC - $100
DJ - $50
Lighting guy - $50
Video - $100
1st Photographer - $100
2nd Photographer $100
Photo assistant - $50
Limo Drivers - $50 each
Florist Delivery - $20
DOC - $50
hair/makeup - $40 each

I have a bunch of threads saved on tipping (this one now included).

I have no intention of tipping a vendor that is the owner of a business unless they go above and beyond the call of duty on my day. I will have $$$ on hand to do this.

For all of their assistants - I plan on giving an appropriate tip - 15%-20% depending on the service from the assistant. For the guy who delivers the personal flowers (bo-ks, bouts & corsages) probably $10.

For the maitre d' and the bridal attendant I'm planning on following 'etiquette' and tipping in accordance with the 'experts'.

For hair and make-up, yes they probably are the business, and they are the exception to the rule of not tipping owners. If I went to a salon I would tip even if it was the owner doing my hair, so why should my day be any different (except for the fact that because it's wedding hair the up-do price is $125, and any other event it's only $65-$75 )

Okay....let's assume the 18% does go to the waitstaff. In my contract it's already calculated @ $3pp Maitre D fee.....so his base tip is prepaid. So at 120 people he's is getting a prepaid tip of $360. I will be giving him more the day of ...he is also my bridal attendant. I assumed I would give him an additional $150-$200.

Am I being cheap?

The 18% that is added to you pp is supossed to cover the waitstaff/bartendar.

This is what we did:

Bridal Attendant: $125
Maitre D: $400
Captain: $200
Limo: $50 per driver
Photo: $150
Lighting Assistant: $50

The tip was included in our Band price so we didn't tip them anything extra.

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Posted by vita930

I would also like to know.....

The Carltun told me (and put on paper) that I should tip the Maitre D $7-$10 per person.

I think that is ridiculous....that means I would need to tip $1500-$2000......

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That's insane.

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Posted by franksgirl323

Okay....let's assume the 18% does go to the waitstaff. In my contract it's already calculated @ $3pp Maitre D fee.....so his base tip is prepaid. So at 120 people he's is getting a prepaid tip of $360. I will be giving him more the day of ...he is always my bridal attendant. I assumed I would give him an additional $150-$200.

Am I being cheap?

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you have to 'prepay' your tip? then honestly, at $3/person already, I wouldn't tip anymore. you are already tipping the 'suggested amount' and i personally find it rude to require the tip to be prepaid....absolutely absurd IMO.

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Posted by kissy27

My FH & I were just discussing this last night! I don't want to seem 'cheap' either but as my FH put it, this is their 'JOB' & in today's day in age, everyone expects to get paid a 'tip' on top of what we pay to the company.

We decided that we will do $2pp for the Maitre D. My FH will have extra $$ on him if he deems it necessary to pay extra.

The Bridal Attendant-I intend on giving what i think is 'acceptable' to my standards. I will be playing it by ear & seeing what happens

Limo- We already paid gratuity with the bill but will probably throw an extra $20 at the drivier.

Florist- I will tip the delivery guy just like any other time I receive flowers

Band-FH feels that we are feeding them & that is sufficient enough. I am still deciding on what to do here but if anything, it will be $20 per member

Photo/video - Like Hollie said, we will not be doing this at the time of the wedding. I want to see how my pictures come out & the albums & then we will tip accordingly.

In all honesty, we do not have more then $200 left in our account when this is all over & done with. As Christine had stated before, all these vendors are getting paid their 'normal' salaries that day too. Whatever we give them for their services extra should not have a specific $$ value, I feel it should be based on how well they 'do' their job! No one tips me when I do my job well!!!!

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yes!!! i used to wait tables FOR TIPS and even then i never EXPECTED a certain amount because it is based on my performance after all!

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Posted by vixchik

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Posted by franksgirl323

Okay....let's assume the 18% does go to the waitstaff. In my contract it's already calculated @ $3pp Maitre D fee.....so his base tip is prepaid. So at 120 people he's is getting a prepaid tip of $360. I will be giving him more the day of ...he is also my bridal attendant. I assumed I would give him an additional $150-$200 for that duty.

Am I being cheap?

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you have to 'prepay' your tip? then honestly, at $3/person already, I wouldn't tip anymore. you are already tipping the 'suggested amount' and i personally find it rude to require the tip to be prepaid....absolutely absurd IMO.

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Well it's called the maitre d fee ...and its quoted as $3 pp....so i assume that is the tip. Am I wrong?

This is what I am doing:
Maitre'D -- 400
Limo drivers 2- 100
Photographer-- 100
assistant- 50
Videographer- 100
dj- (4) - 200
bridal attendant- 100
floral delivery- 20-30
hair- 30
makeup- 20