Guest list

JAAMS Posted: May 19, 2009 12:05 PM

Re: Guest list

Ugh yeah.. we need to finalize our guest list by the end of the summer so that we can order STDs.

This is going to be one of the greatest horrors of my life, I can tell.

jlt2010 Posted: May 19, 2009 12:07 PM

Re: Guest list

i know how you feel! FH and I have been trying to finalize the guest list and he's just been aggravating me.

mbscheer Posted: May 19, 2009 12:25 PM

Re: Guest list

This was so hard for me. When we initially made our list we wanted to invite 300 people!! We are down now to 220 but it has been so hard!

angel1219eyez Posted: May 19, 2009 01:26 PM

Re: Guest list

thank god im done with thiS!

Juhgail Posted: May 19, 2009 01:54 PM

Re: Guest list

Posted by NanandEric08

Okay ladies, I think I have figured out the most stressful part of the wedding planning for me...making the guest list!!!! All this proper etiquette is annoying me. I can't invite one cousin that I am close with, unless you invite your other cousins because that will look bad. BLAH BLAH BLAH. Fh wants to invite anyone who's wedding we were invited to in a 5 year radius, although we don't even talk to these people! I had to put the pen down and walk away. Ughhhh!

This is what I did. First, you have to reasonably decide how many people you can afford.

If you can afford 300 then invite whoever you want!

We made a list of immediate family and friends that we knew were invited.

Then we made a list of extended family/friends we would LIKE to invite

Then we made a 'B' list or people it would be nice to invite if we could.

Dont invite everyone who's wedding you have been to in the last 5 years if it measn NOT inviting your cousins.

I also only invited 3 second cousins. They have siblings I did NOT invite. I am friends with these cousins and not with the siblings. Honestly, if someone has a problem, I dont care. Its my wedding.

But think about all those EXTRA people. I would rather have friends than the random 10 people's weddings ive been to that I dont even kow.

jcreilly Posted: May 19, 2009 02:02 PM

Re: Guest list

Im sorry! we keep going back and forth as well FH wants to invite anyone he bumps in to, but i will cut the list down once we hit November i am sending STD only to our family9 they will never be cut) and extremly close friends right now . Once it get s closer and he see the price for the RH go home he will be a little bit better (i hope ) with cutting the list

JenBill61210 Posted: May 19, 2009 02:06 PM

Re: Guest list

i have 160ish on my list right now, but a lot include 'courtesy invites' of people that my mom knows, that i know wont come but i have to invite anyway.... i have to guarantee 125 though so im kinda scared

cateydee Posted: May 19, 2009 03:02 PM

Re: Guest list

mine is a PITA too!!!!!!! right now i am not inviting a lot of my first cousins because i havent seen them in 5 years but i am inviting others. i know im going to hear about it from some family members but i am bracing myself for it now. it s my friggin wedding and ill invite who i want (let me just add that there have been some extenuating circumstances in our relationships for me to not invite them)

GR2010 Posted: May 19, 2009 10:09 PM

Re: Guest list

FH is on this kick where he thinks the guest list have to be even... I happen to have a big family, he does not... so instead he inviting all these relatives he never speaks to and it makes me nuts! Who cares who has more people on their guest list... I don't want a bunch of people who are practically strangers roaming our wedding!!

Nina1010 Posted: May 19, 2009 10:58 PM

Re: Guest list

It is stressful...can't blame you for walkin away...LOL. FH and I keep adding...oh what about...how did we forget...lol Too much!

lissylissa Posted: May 19, 2009 11:28 PM

Re: Guest list

o god i started this in the very beginning than once my fmil gave me her list it got me sooooo pissed so i havent touched either list in about 2 months lol ugh

MrsCM Posted: May 20, 2009 08:17 AM

Re: Guest list

Our guest list wasn't that bad but there were so many revisions of it, the most stressful part was collecting addresses.

JillandJoe Posted: May 20, 2009 10:08 AM

Re: Guest list

this was hard!! I finally finoshed mine and its 50 over my minimum so hopefully some peeps are busy!

NanandEric08 Posted: May 20, 2009 10:15 AM

Re: Guest list

Yeah, thats what I am thinking. I just got off the phone with FMIL and she asked how many my dad was having and now her's has gone up a couple. I have heard that the average of 'no's' is like, 20% of who you invite. Let's hope.

asg450 Posted: May 20, 2009 04:38 PM

Re: Guest list

Omg, be glad you're not Indian. FH has so many invitation rules to follow.

We need to send invitations to ALL of his family members in India, even though we know they will not/cannot come and FH doesn't really talk to them. (our invitations are going to cost close to $2.00 to mail in the U.S.; can you imagine for us to send it to India).

We also have to send invitations to his sister's in-laws (I don't know them and neither does FH, so why do I need to give them an invite is beyond me).

We need to hand deliver the invitations to his family that lives in New York and maybe New Jersey. Hand deliver. Or else everyone will start drama with us.

Its2Snappy Posted: May 20, 2009 04:41 PM

Re: Guest list

Posted by asg450

Omg, be glad you're not Indian. FH has so many invitation rules to follow.

We need to send invitations to ALL of his family members in India, even though we know they will not/cannot come and FH doesn't really talk to them. (our invitations are going to cost close to $2.00 to mail in the U.S.; can you imagine for us to send it to India).

We also have to send invitations to his sister's in-laws (I don't know them and neither does FH, so why do I need to give them an invite is beyond me).

We need to hand deliver the invitations to his family that lives in New York and maybe New Jersey. Hand deliver. Or else everyone will start drama with us.

OMG! I would go insane. I am so sorry you have to follow that. Ugh.

MikesBride2B Posted: May 20, 2009 04:43 PM

Re: Guest list

Thank goodness this has not been a terrible process...I basically told my parents to give me their BARE MINIMUM list...which ****** because we wanted no more than 75 people total and my parents' list was 70 people...and since I'm the only granddaughter on both sides, there's really nowhere to cut people out.

But I think it'll all work out...right now we're around 130 and there's a decent amt of OOT guests who will not come...by our guesstimations we should have around 103 at the wedding which would be AWESOME

kris_gets_hitched Posted: May 20, 2009 04:47 PM

Re: Guest list

Posted by asg450

Omg, be glad you're not Indian. FH has so many invitation rules to follow.

We need to send invitations to ALL of his family members in India, even though we know they will not/cannot come and FH doesn't really talk to them. (our invitations are going to cost close to $2.00 to mail in the U.S.; can you imagine for us to send it to India).

We also have to send invitations to his sister's in-laws (I don't know them and neither does FH, so why do I need to give them an invite is beyond me).

We need to hand deliver the invitations to his family that lives in New York and maybe New Jersey. Hand deliver. Or else everyone will start drama with us.

Girl, I know the feeling.

We decided to do two celebrations. His mom really wanted an uber-traditional Bengali one and we were like 'hey, if YOU want to take it on, all on your own, go for it!' - we broke that news to her last week. She hit the ground running with her plans. To be honest, I don't even mind if I have no input in this second celebration...the one I'm planning is enough!

As for hand-delivering...uh, no. I ain't doing it. They can start whatever drama they want; I figure if it wasn't over my refusal to hand-deliver these things, it'd be over something else.

NanandEric08 Posted: May 20, 2009 04:51 PM

Re: Guest list

Posted by asg450

Omg, be glad you're not Indian. FH has so many invitation rules to follow.

We need to send invitations to ALL of his family members in India, even though we know they will not/cannot come and FH doesn't really talk to them. (our invitations are going to cost close to $2.00 to mail in the U.S.; can you imagine for us to send it to India).

We also have to send invitations to his sister's in-laws (I don't know them and neither does FH, so why do I need to give them an invite is beyond me).

We need to hand deliver the invitations to his family that lives in New York and maybe New Jersey. Hand deliver. Or else everyone will start drama with us.

Oh wow...I am sorry!

Im getting Married Posted: May 20, 2009 08:44 PM

Re: Guest list

FH thinks we need to send an invite to everyone that wants to come..NO..I purposely swayed him toward the smaller room because I do not want a lot of people.

We dd a tentative list of those that would most definately come and those who might not. That is the list we worked with for our minimum.