gotten a gift from FH that wasn't exactly the most thoughtful and then got into a fight over it???
Because that's what happened last night. He sent me flowers for Vday, orchids, which are pretty and all, but he knows red roses are my favorites. And the card was a stupid movie quote......not even romantic or saying happy vday or anything. So when he got home I was kind of in a not so great mood, and when he asked why, I told him I wish he would've put a little more thought into it.
Then we got into a huge fight because he said we agreed not to get gifts anyway so they were just supposed to be a nice surprise and that I was acting like a spoiled brat.
Yet, he also sent his mother and best friend (female, single, long annoying story) flowers, and they both got roses. He said he just picked three things and had them sent out. I just wish he would've put more thought into mine. I feel like it just doesn't matter to him.
We semi-made up this morning before he left for the weekend to go upstate.......so now I won't see him again till Monday.
Seriously girls, am I overreacting here? Or am I right in wishing he'd have been a little more thoughtful?
Kiki1103
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yes, this has happened to me. And in the end I wish I didn't say anything. It caused a huge fight that just wasn't worth it. I understand what you are saying, especially since he got gifts for other people but at least he did get you something, sometimes guys just don't understand these things. I would say just drop it, and thank him for the orchids.
20mrsc10
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mmm this is a hard one fh isn't thoughtful/romantic at all-it used to bother me but ive pretty much given up and accepted it, so if i got flowers at all on vday my jaw might drop
on the other hand if he's normally thoughtful and this was less thoughtful i suppose i would be upset
regy_k
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I dont know. I am just happy to get anything. orchids sounds amazing. maybe he wanted to be a little different this time. I think u got upset over nothing. sorry that u did tho. honestly not worth it.
jmgoncal
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That would probably bother me and I would cause an argument about it and then later regret causing the argument b/c it's not worth it. Guys are just not as thoughtful as we are - he probably thought he was doing a great thing by sending you flowers at all. Irritating? Yes, but probably something that won't really change in the end.
lbkate
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I was in the same situation last May... We weren't engaged yet, and I was kinda waiting for my ring. My birthday rolls around, and he got me a tennis bracelet (beautiful, yes...but I wanted my ring!!!) He got so upset that I was mad...I wish I would have never said anything b/c my ring came after the summer...and it ****** to see him hurting about something that was so awesome to begin with...
The only thing I would be kinda pissed about is the friend getting roses... Hang in there!
GR2010
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I understand where you're coming from... when we first started dating FH was the most romantic guy on the face of the planet... tickets to the opera, ballet, dinner at places he knew I would love... sweet cards and emails for no reason.... and then this weekend it is V-Day and I get a text from him just now (I at least got him to bring Darwin to the vet for me) saying... 'Did you want to go to dinner or something this weekend??'
SERIOUSLY???? Yeah, or something... I mean I didn't go nuts for Valentine's Day for him but I got him hockey tickets and I'm not even kidding you... last night like a bunch of 3rd graders my sister and I hit up Michael's and bought stuff to make Valentine's... I don't even think I'll get a card...
So after my mini vent (I'm just a ray of sunshine this weekend aren't I???) I can definitely see how you would be upset... it's not like it's hard to remember you like red roses and it's not like red roses aren't staring him in the face everywhere he goes... so I can see being annoyed since the 'thoughtfulness factor' was nil... but in the long run it's probably not worth getting upset about... unless he makes a habit of it!!!!
StaceyWill
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Yes-I've been in that same situation and it sux!!! All I can say is you did the right thing in telling him how you feel cause now he'll be more aware of it.
If he had just gotten you flowers and noone else, I'd say let it go.
His mother gave birth to him so I understand why she gets flowers.. but why send them to a female friend? And why does she get roses? Tell FH if he really wants to help out this friend, set her up with someone so she gets married, has a baby and stops hanging around you guys.. haha. No seriously, you didn't overreact.
soontobecruz
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I understand. I have felt the same also. Last year Matt hadn't even gotten me a card for v-day (he forgot) and I was upset. I mean I don't even like v-day very much but I did want a card espeically our first v-day engaged. Well he tried to make it up by buying this balloon/teddybear/candy thing from 7-11. I accepted it and moved on.
I know how you feel but don't let it ruin your weekend. He tried better than not trying at all
flibbertigibbet
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here's the thing girls...
because i've been there too.
if we know our FH's are kind of putzy about these things... you can't be saying 'okay this time we won't exchange presents'
you just need to be straight with him now and say:
'Look I know its silly... but I love Valentine's Day/Birthdays/Anniversaries (any or all) and they're really important to me. I think its important that we ALWAYS do something nice for one another on these days. I always will put some thought and effort into what to give you so please do the same for me.'
and judging by the many, MANY, MANYMANY guys i was just laughing at the target in hicksville standing around last minute-like buying their cards and bears and candy for their womens... it may or may not work.
but at least you were up front with them.
end of story.
MrsSoto
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yes!!!!!!!!! and i didnt want to say anything of course but it was eating away at me. honestly, i swear i wouldve preferred nothing at all or for him to say that he was short on money and could we just have a nice dinner or did i mind waiting for a gift.
i dont know how i brought it up (probally something else set me off or i started a fight somehow so i could bring it up lol)
this is one of the most hurtful things fh ever did to me. to me, i was like he was going to buy a gift that he felt obligated to as if i was a coworker or something.
im sorry hunny
xela
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I wouldnt let the orchids bother me but I'd be furious over the other girl getting flowers. JMO but then again I don't know the whole story.
blessed18
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I think it was a good thing that you let him know what was bugging you. men need to understand that its not that hard to put some effort into things just like we do. and why is he sending flowers to his bestfriend who is a female? that would have gotten me furious. not sure if its a sister/brotherly relationship but still.
Clover23
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Re: Have you ever....
yes this has happened to me, but, in the grand scheme of things you shouldn't let yourself be so upset over it. you guys are getting married in 4 months and you've been together forever. i know it scuks when they don't put so much thought into things though.
AngnShaun
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FH never puts any thought into gifts for me... ive kinda gotten used to it
SoontobeGallagher
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I would be happy to get anything. It's not worth the fighting. IMO.
bride2be1012
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The orchids would upset me a little because I believe in making things as special as possible for my partner and would be pissed if he didn't return the favor. Howev,er, the thing that would be totally unacceptable is the roses to the other girl. I'd flip over that one! I can see how you would feel that that was a slap in the face/.
CloudNine
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at first when i was reading i was thinking 'she shouldnt have said anything, just let it be' but then i got to the part of him sending roses to his mom and his friend and then it irked me. if they got roses why couldnt have you gotten roses. i prob would have said something but after he made the spoiled brat comment i woulds just left it at that
