Have you ever....

---

Posted by DWKSwed

Is this the same female friend who stays over late and made that comment about how she would want to be with him if you weren't? I would be bothered by the fact that she got the
flowers I wanted. That's a little ridiculous,
I mean it shows he's thoughtful to send to her but then yeah
he should be more thoughtful with your gift.
I understand where you're coming from.

---

YES! HER! I know he's just completely clueless and just trying to be nice, but COME ON!!!!

---

Posted by Lsorrent

---

Posted by DWKSwed

Is this the same female friend who stays over late and made that comment about how she would want to be with him if you weren't? I would be bothered by the fact that she got the
flowers I wanted. That's a little ridiculous,
I mean it shows he's thoughtful to send to her but then yeah
he should be more thoughtful with your gift.
I understand where you're coming from.

---

YES! HER! I know he's just completely clueless and just trying to be nice, but COME ON!!!!

---

WHAT????? I never heard this story!!! I would be extra pissed then!!!

i agree with everyone else, especially the being bothered that his good friend received roses..

or heck, even flowers for that matter but obviously dont know details on that situation but a def a prob. with me! try ur hardest to move on but it would be hard for me... hang in there...

It definitely sux, and FH should have put more thought into it, but maybe he thought he was?

I'd honestly try not to read anything into it.

---

Posted by Lsorrent

---

Posted by DWKSwed

Is this the same female friend who stays over late and made that comment about how she would want to be with him if you weren't? I would be bothered by the fact that she got the
flowers I wanted. That's a little ridiculous,
I mean it shows he's thoughtful to send to her but then yeah
he should be more thoughtful with your gift.
I understand where you're coming from.

---

YES! HER! I know he's just completely clueless and just trying to be nice, but COME ON!!!!

---

sorry hun but i would be FURIOUS too...
FH's are a little clueless w/gifts.. i get it..

but i will def fight about him getting roses for his mom & friend...maybe not mom so much (that just shows ur fh is a great son and u should be proud of that) but the friend...ahhhhhh will drive me nuts!

---

Posted by Lsorrent

---

Posted by DWKSwed

Is this the same female friend who stays over late and made that comment about how she would want to be with him if you weren't? I would be bothered by the fact that she got the
flowers I wanted. That's a little ridiculous,
I mean it shows he's thoughtful to send to her but then yeah
he should be more thoughtful with your gift.
I understand where you're coming from.

---

YES! HER! I know he's just completely clueless and just trying to be nice, but COME ON!!!!

---

Yeah, I am sorry but I think you should put an end to that... after she made that comment I think it changed things, and you as his wife shouldn't have to feel uncomfortable about stuff like that. He doesn't need to send her flowers... he may feel bad that she doesn't have someone, but your hurt feelings about it trump hers, he needs to realize and respect that. I think you should have a talk with him about it after you both cool down.

I think you overreacted about the flowers..because it's really the thought that counts.. and it was really sweet of him to do that... HOWEVER.. I would be ANGRY if my fiance got a female friend flowers... AND.. my FAVORITE flowers nonetheless..

I can def understand you being upset... especially about the female friend...especially if it was the one who kinda sorta said something sketchy way back when. On the other side though, I honestly have come to think that guys don't think into these things as much. Hope you feel better soon

I probably wouldnt be so upset about the card or flowers in general. FH bought me the most hideous flower arrangement once...no clue what he was thinking when he ordered it...but he put some effort in so I just kep quiet.

HOWEVER, I would be mad that the female friend (I remember stories about her) got the roses. Actually, I'd probably be annoyed that she got flowers at all.

Ok the single friend... You don't need to tell me anything about it however, THATS MESSED UP! There I said it. Let some other dude buy her flowers. I have a best guy friend, and he NEVER sent me flowers and I NEVER sent him flowers. But whatever.. I don't know the situation, but whatever it is You know I will side with yor regardless

So about the gift. Last year for our anny FH bought me diamond studs. Beautiful. However, I specifically told him no Jewelry. He spends money on quality stuff and than I get nervous that I will lose them or something. That same year, I spent some pretty money on getting him Race car driving lessons. He never tells me what he wants, so I killed myself in getting him this awesome gift.

So here I am giving him an experience, something i busted my butt getting, and here he is taking the 'easy' way out and got me jewelry. I was upset about it and I cried and he got mad b/c they were expensive but it bothered me that he didn't listen. I love the earrings but I was so bothered with him not listening to me that i lost it. Truth be told, I wear them everyday, regardless if I am scared of losing them b/c they are beautiful, and b.c he loves me wearing them. But after that anny, whenever he gives me a gift, he puts more effort in it. And listens. Like he knows I am obsessed with Gaga. SOOOOOO he got me tixs for my bday to see her. Total surprise and I could have killed him, but he was so shocked how something like that made me jump around like a little girl.

Moral: Talk to him. Explain to him how this affected you. Say you appreciate the flowers and they are beautiful, but roses are your speed. And more importantly, you still love him. Because girl, lets face it, MEN DON'T LISTEN. So thats why you need to let him know. FH got me pink roses (finally!!!) after years of red. The other day, nonchalantly, I mentioned how much i love shades of pink for roses. He was like 'really????? All those years i've been getting you red..' Today I got Fushia tipped, baby pink roses. And I LOVE them. But thats what I mean... talk to him. They love guidence. Trust me.

If you wanna talk, fm me. I'm here

I dont think you are over reacting at all. I agree with you - I feel like I sometimes have to drop hints all the time to FH to make sure I get what I want. Men's brains are just not programmed to think outside of the box at all. They are satisfied just doing what needs to be done and thats the end of it.

I don't think you're overreacting. Actually, FH sent me flowers to work yesterday. When I opened them up there were all different flowers like lilies and a few roses. FH knows I love roses too and I thought to myself how ugly these flowers were. They even look like they're dying. Anyway, I went onto his email because I was curious how much he paid for these ugly things.....and it was $80 I bet your FH spent around the same on you and unfortunately all men are the same. They go onto a website, pick something quick and that's it.

Honestly, I also find that FH and I are also running out of things to write after all these years. For every holiday so far we write, I can't wait to spend my life with you, etc. How many times can we write the same thing in a card, ya know?

The only thing that would truly annoy me in this situation is him buying flowers for his friend who is a girl. I don't like that at all and you should tell him that although it was very sweet and thoughtful, he shouldn't be buying any other girl flowers!

Thank you girls. That's what bothers me is how f'ing clueless he is. He finds nothing wrong with it and just chalks it up to being nice. And he doesn't understand that sometimes I feel he puts more thought into her than into me.

But he doesn't realize how his 'being nice' can be taken by other people. And when I try to explain it to him, he just tells me I'm being stupid.

Am I jealous? Yes. Am I possessive? Yes. But its because I've been in a situation before when my bf's have been 'friends' with other girls and well, there's a reason I'm no longer with them.

He's never given me a reason to doubt him, but he just doesn't get this.

Ugh......

Thanks again girls........I'm off for my girls night, with FSIL and who else.....but this friend......Should be an interesting evening.

I'm sorry to be the one to say it but clueless?? No...clueless is the gift you got. Clueless is not sending some other woman flowers for V-Day. This is not acceptable IMO and I would not let this go. Is he going to do this when you're married?? Send flowers to his wife and nicer ones to his 'friend'???

I would be SUPER annoyed...not so much at the gift you received, but my FH is NOT buying some other chick flowers if he knows what's good for him!!!! Maybe send her a basket of dasies if her grandmother died, but NOT for Valentines Day...nooooooooo way!!!!!

Edited for spelling

i got a card from my FH that I just was like ***!!!

It's a card with homer simpson and marge on it

' When you've been in a relationship as long as we have, you reach a certain level of comfort....'

I open the card and it's homer peeking out from the corner of the bathroom singing

' I'm whizzing with the door open, and I love it!!!!!!!'

I can't help but laugh bc he does this ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL the time.










But yea, I'd be PO'ed too. Why is he sending his BF roses? Not OK in my book.

It does happen with FH and I at times. Some guys aren't as thoughtful as women. The little things really mean so much more... they don't get it.

---

Posted by Kiki1103

yes, this has happened to me. And in the end I wish I didn't say anything. It caused a huge fight that just wasn't worth it. I understand what you are saying, especially since he got gifts for other people but at least he did get you something, sometimes guys just don't understand these things. I would say just drop it, and thank him for the orchids.

---

ITA!!!